North Carolina

I just need to vent..

So FI's sister just myspace im'd me asking if I knew if their mom was coming to our wedding. I told her I didn't know but I sure hoped she would be there. She then says well okay I'll try to make it.Ugh. To FI's sister: This is your brother. Why can't you make it a point to come to his wedding.Now on to FI's mom. She's a piece of work. She is a 3rd shift customer service manager at Wal-mart. We graduate from college 2 weeks prior to the wedding. She INSISTS she can't take 2 weekends off in the same month to come to her ONLY SON'S graduation and wedding!!!I think I will cry for FI if they don't show up. He says he doesn't care. They don't have a bad relationship, they just don't think these kinds of things are important or once in a lifetime events. :(
~Kaitlyn~
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Re: I just need to vent..

  • alliegator8alliegator8 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I would think taking off time for the wedding would be more important then graduation. To me, the graduation is secondary. The wedding would be much more important to me. It FI mom can't take off work both weekends, maybe she could take it off for the wedding instead of the graduation.
  • ktyd8ktyd8 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Yeah we've suggested it to her. FI is really proud of graduating since he's the first in his family EVER to graduate from college. I guess I just find it very hurtful because my family would never miss anything like this!
    ~Kaitlyn~
    image
    Anniversary
    My Chart
    DX PCOS 2002 @ age 14
    DX Diabetes 3/12
    My Diabetes Blog
    TTA until ?
  • alliegator8alliegator8 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    That's completely understandable
  • edited December 2011
    Ugh Kaitlyn that sucks.  I'm sorry that you and FI are going through this.  I agree with Alyson, I think that the wedding should come first but I understand that graduation is also important.  Vibes for you both during this time!
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  • meredithl618meredithl618 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Uggh. I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this stress! I'm sure there has to be a logical way for her to deal with this. Can't she try to minimize the amount of time she needs to take off, ie just taking off one day instead of the entire weekend... Or, couldn't she work with them to work other days in the week to make up for the days she needs to miss? May is long enough away she should be able to figure something out!! Good luck though!
  • edited December 2011
    I know im a little late on this but this sounds EXACTLY like my FI's mom!  She works some rinky-dink job and she acts like she doesnt know if she can make it to his graduation (in Dec) and doesn't really try to make an effort to help with any part of the wedding!  FI doesnt have a great relationship with his mom either obviously.
    Married my best friend 06.23.10 :)image *Photo by Story Photographers*
  • CJ4578CJ4578 member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I'm so sorry ktyd8, I have the opposite problem with the FMIL (over-involved to the point of major irritation) but I think it would be so much more hurtful to us if we were in your situation.Is it a "I will lose my job" type deal or is she just worried they'll be angry? Or, the worst, if she's just doing this to cause drama/get you to beg her to come (my friend had this problem with her FFIL) THAT is way beyond not-okay. My friend dealt with it by just saying "we want you there" and leaving it at that. Once FFIL saw he wasn't going to get any more attention he said he was coming and ended the drama. Maybe that'll help?Don't know but I do hope everything works out!
    -- C
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