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S/O: Registry Question

I really don't want this to come off as snarky, because I'm 100% serious about this question as I'm a bit confused...

FI and I will be starting our registry soon and everywhere I look people talk about registering for china or crystal things.  What's the purpose of them?  I feel like crystal items are just dust collectors and I grew up with a very large family that has really big family holidays and we never used fina china regardless of whose house the dinner parties were at.  We either used the regular dinnerware or paper plates (if we ran out of regular plates)... side note: is my family trashy for that??? haha  :-)

Should FI and I consider registering for either?  Would it be wiser to register for items we'll actually use on a daily basis?  Are there any real reasons why we should have them or is it just a personal choice?  And for those who did register/buy either fine china or crystal - what was your reasoning behind it? 

Again, NONE of this is meant to be snarky at all (I pinky swear), I just want to know if FI and I should be thinking about registering for those types of items.
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Re: S/O: Registry Question

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    mbcdefgmbcdefg member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    We never considered regsitering for crystal, but were on the fence about registering for china:

    We don't anticipate using it until we get a house and can host people, and we don't have a place to store it so it would've had to go to my parents' house. Plus we're not fancy people and didn't grow up in families where the good china (if they even owned "good china") was used for big gatherings.

    However, a coworker brought up a good point ... she said that for most people, if you don't register for it and people don't buy it for you, you'd probably never buy it on your own. I thought that was a good point, and so did MH when I talked to him about it.

    But then my grandmother gave us a set of china, albeit nothing fancy or spectacular, that she wasn't using ... it was a set that was collecting dust in her vacation house. So we took it and decided not to register for china. We only registered for casual everyday dinnerware ... we registered for 12 settings and got 5 as gifts, and bought 1 ourselves. We're not currently using those.

    If we had the room to store/display it, I would've liked to have registered for it to at least see if someone would buy it for us. But since it's not practical for us to have china or crystal right now, we decided it'd be better to skip it. Maybe in a few years when we're in a better living situation, we'll get ourselves something nice.
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    mrs.ammamrs.amma member
    First Comment First Anniversary Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I was originally not going to register for china. We did use it in my family growing up but only once or twice a year at holidays, though some people ended up with mix and match plates b/c we had more than 12 ppl. But, I was eventually talked into registering for some. True, I can't really find a purpose for it now but I know I will probably never buy it myself. And I know I will want a nice set when we get all settled and host our own family gatherings. We ended up picking a classic pattern that isn't overly "china-y". I didnt want super fancy gold-rimmed stuff. Its brown and white and simple.

    I think if you feel like you might want china at some point in your married life, even if it not for a couple of years, you should register for some. You probably will never be able to justify buying 12 settings of china for yourself  lol
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    edited December 2011
    I didn't register for crystal other than some plain wine glasses, just because it's NMS.  I have friends who love crystal and registered for a ton of crystal items since they like having them.  I did register for china since in my family we always bring out the good china for holiday meals and I plan to start hosting some of them. 
    If you can't imagine a time ever in your life when you would use these things and think they will just gather dust, I wouldn't register for them.  But, if you think it's something you don't need now but would want for the future I would register for it - when else are you going to get it.

    Everyone's situation and tastes are different, which is why everyone's registries are different.
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    Laurms15Laurms15 member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I registered for a set of 12 for my fine china and formal glassware. I really love to cook and entertain and for me part of cooking and entertaining is setting an elaborate table and decorating it as such. However I realize not everyone likes to do that. So if you don't feel you will use it then registering for what you will use is a better idea. Its a personal preference and I lean toward being on the more formal side of things.
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    jchristeljchristel member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I didn't register for either.  My mother gave me her china and it has been in storage for 3 years.  I don't know if I will ever use it and I know I won't use crystal or "silver" either.  We registered for nice everyday dishes, a new set of stainless flatware and regular glasses.  
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    uppereastgirluppereastgirl member
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    edited December 2011
    Personal choice.  

    We registered for both everyday dinnerware, stemware and flatware and fine china, crystal stemware and service pieces and silverware... you don't have to pick one or the other.  I come from a family that uses china, crystal and silver basically any time anyone other than the nuclear family is present, so I never really considered *not* registering for it.  I've only used the silver and china once (and I've been married for a while) but I'm happy to have it.  I'm sure it will come in handy when I become a grown-up and have grown-up dinner parties, and I can't see grown-up me going out and spending thousands on china, crystal and silver because I realize later in life that I want it.

    But if you don't think you'll ever use it, I wouldn't bother.
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    edited December 2011
    I also grew up in a family where basically no one even owned china or crystal.  My mom only owns crystal because her grandmother gave it to her, and it did nothing but sit on a shelf my whole life.  FI and I are not going to register for either, and actually my grandmother gave me her china and her set of crystal wine glasses in March, since I am the oldest granddaughter, which I thought was very nice.  But we had no intentions of registering for it.
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    edited December 2011
    Thanks ladies!!  Looks like it'll probably be a no-go for us then on both fronts.  Thanks again for the honest responses!
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    edited December 2011
    We didn't register for formal china.  We are registered for really nice everyday dishes and then we registered for formal glasswear.  My mom has a beautiful set of china that I plan on using one day.  She has 24 plates, and said she would part with 12 as soon as I say go....but I'm holding off since we live iin an apartment in Astoria.

    I think china is a personal choice.  My family always uses it, although my FI's family never uses it. 
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    edited December 2011
    We registered for China.. I cant wait to use it - now we need a china cabinet.
    (it's dishwasher safe btw)
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    edited December 2011
    I have been debating the same thing. I didn't grow up in a family that used fine china so I was thinking I would just get really nice everyday dishes. But on the other hand, I love hosting and I know one day, I may regret not registering for it.

    I am still on the fence. My other thought is that there are so many other things we need so I don't know if I want people spending their money on pieces of china as opposed to pots or pans that we need. Then, what happens if I don't get all the china I register for or get mismatched settings??  
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    Reilly626Reilly626 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I didnt- Im Irish so I did ask for a Belleek fram and a Waterford frame, but otherwise no fine china...
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    Reilly626Reilly626 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Actually my showers are nearing and 99% of people are buying from BBB bc I bet the coupon and convenience... Crate and Barrel isnt moving.. I only wanted bedding from Macys.
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    edited December 2011
    if you dont intend on using it...then dont register for it. 
    i wont be registering for it - i'd be afraid to use it!!  if i'm going that fancy - i'm probably eating out!  HTH!
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    edited December 2011
    We registered for it...even though it will probably be stored at my parents' house or his parents' house until we have the room for it, we decided that it's something that we'll want to have when we're grownup, but we would probably never buy it for ourselves.
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    edited December 2011
    We registered for it.  My extended family is pretty small.  Both my parents and my aunt, who do most of the holiday entertaining, use theirs all the time.  I am trying to get a holiday so I figured I would probably get use out of it.  Plus I like to entertain. 
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    DS0305DS0305 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Definitely don't register for either if you don't plan on using them.

    We didn't register for crystal.  We did register for china though.  It's not like we would use it often, just holidays.  And the only person who bought some of the china for us was my mom.
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    edited December 2011
    I registered for crystal and china and will use both regularly.  My Mom uses hers often...not just for big family holiday dinners, but for just when MH and I are visiting too.  China doesn't = only for use on special occasions.  Some people use it that way, but you could use it every night if you want.  And just because your family does it one way, doesn't mean you have to follow in their footsteps. 

    I will use mine often and that's why we bought it.  I wanted to have nice stuff for when we have company, etc.  I also am a fan of having a formal dining room, so maybe I'm just "fancy". haha.

    If there's any piece of you that thinks you may want china/crystal at some point in your life, I would register for it because I feel like it's something you'll never go out and buy for yourself at a later point in time.
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    edited December 2011
    We def skipped fine china, crystal, and silver flatware.
    There are numerous sets in my family if the queen ever comes & I need them, but all of my older cousins / step sister were made offers for them also ~ never took them.
    We just don't entertain like that.
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    dmoney79dmoney79 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    we registered for fancy china, but not crystal or fancy flatware (just every day glasses and flatware)
    we only got 4 settings of our china, and really, its kind of pricey, so i don't see us going to finish the set....plus, we don't have any room for it....so i'm not sure what we're going to do....
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