So, am I wrong?

SJimenez218

Well, I picked my Spring colors - Orange, yellow & ivory. I fell in love with these pictures of bouquets and my mom kinda agreed. So out with the two toned pinks & in with the orange & yellows! So happy.Now, guest list >_< well we finally did a guest list. We decided to only have immediate friends & family. Awesome 1,2,3 quick an easy. Well now the issue is children. I am going to allow my family children to come because there are only really like 5 and one of them is a newborn. They are all well behaved; we never had a problem with them at a restaurant or anything. But now this is where the issue comes.. some of our friends have kids & they are horrible - sometimes I get impatient with them. I do not want their children to come.. is this me being selfish or mean? Like for example, last year I went to my best friends wedding and the only kids there were her nephews & during the entrance they ran in the middle wouldn't let them have their first dance & they were caught putting their fingers in the cake!! Can you image if they come to mine? I would flip out.HELP LADIES HELP.

kpeteley

I say invite your family kids and don't invite friends.  I would imagine your friends would want a night for themselves anyway.  I am having my first cousins (ages 2 - 16) come and FI's god daughter and her sister. We are not inviting any other children and that's that.  I am not a big fan of being told I HAVE to invite anyone. 

kle0113

The ONLY kids that were allowed at my reception were family (nieces and nephews).  My nieces are 16, 13 and 5, my nephews are 8 and 7.  MH nephews are 4 and 2.  We had not one problem with them they were all awsome.  We pretty much made it known to whoever asked that their kids were not invited.  We had one couple not come because of this, but in my mind they are the ones who missed out and a fun night. 

mbcdefg

You're not selfish at all. You're entitled to invite who you awnt to your wedding ... and drawing the line at "family kids only" is perfectly fine. If your friends have a problem with that, then they don't need to come (and frankly, I would think that most parents would welcome the opportunity to have an adult date night). We're not inviting ANY kids, even family (although the only kids in our families are second and third cousins, so they're not immediate family like nieces or nephews). Doing so would open the floodgates for at least 12 more people that we just can't fit.

SJimenez218

Hey ladies,Thanks now I feel better because my FI was like you are being too harsh & I told him I was not because I do not want to deal with someones headache because I will definitely turn into zilla if they ruin my day LOL.Now did you ladies tell them by word of mouth or did you put it on the rsvp?

Danes983

Your not wrong... You only should invite who you want.  If they get upset that is stupid of them.  Its your day. What you and your FI want is what happens.

kle0113

My invites were only addressed to the couple...Mr & Mrs Jon Smith.  If it were a family invite we did Mr & Mrs Jon Smith & Family.  We did not have an inner envelope for our invites so we just made the outer say who was invited.  Like I posted before only one couple had a problem with this...o'well! 

Lola Minnie

You don't have to invite their children. I don't get what is with some parents these days. Wouldn't they want a fun night out at a wedding when their kids are home with a babysitter (or family member)? Just make sure to address the invites to "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith" - they should get the point since you are not writing "and family". If they do RSVP with their children, nicely say it is an adult reception aside from immediate family.

alliecarrie41

stick to either no kids or family kids only.  you can't invite one friend's kid bc you like them, and not another. 

acablitas

You're totally not being selfish at all.  I'm only invite my immediate family's children, and there are A LOT of them to begin with from both mine and FI's side. Family friends' children.  No need to invite them.  Don't feel bad at all.

uppereastgirl

I think that's absolutely fine, and not at all selfish or mean.Orange and yellow sounds pretty.

30may09bride

We also only had family kids at the wedding.  DH has 2 nephew's (who were in the bridal party) and I have a few cousins with children (all very well behaved children) and that was it.  All of my friends with kids were happy to have a free night. 

SJimenez218

Lola, thanks great idea. That is exactly what I am going to do. Invite only my family children & no friends' children. Hopefully by not applying & family they will get the point. Just with maybe two of the friends I am going to have to put down how many people so they exactly get the point since for them it will be & family since I am inviting their parents & stuff! BUT GIRLS THANKS FOR THE HELP - YOU ARE ALL AWESOME!

mbcdefg

Just with maybe two of the friends I am going to have to put down how many people so they exactly get the point since for them it will be & family since I am inviting their parents & stuff! Are you talking about doing something on the reply card like, "2 seats have been reserved in your honor"?Just be careful with this. Say you invite Jim and Jane, and Jane has to work late that night. You don't want Jim to reply that he's bringing Little Stevie with him, and then if you argue that you don't have room he could reply, "But you SAID we have two seats reserved, so obviously you have room. Jane can't make it so I'm bringing Stevie to fill her seat."Where are you getting your invitations from? Some people have made their own RSVP cards, or filled in guests' names ahead of time, to show exactly who's invited:Mr. Jim Smith __ accepts __ declinesMrs. Jane Smith __ accepts __ declines

Beach_Bride

We also only had our nieces/nephews at our wedding.  Flame away if you want, but we put "Adults Only Reception" on both the invite and rsvp card.  It saved us from having to call people back and explain no kids. Some people do not understand that Mr. & Mrs Smith on the envelope literally means only Mr. & Mrs. Smith.

brad1431

it is your wedding, so do what you want, but know for a fact that some people will not be happy and may not show cause of your decision.

SJimenez218

Paper Divas - hm, that is very true. I gotta see because its hard to put Adult Reception only because I do not want to confuse my family.. But I am going to check out if they do that each persons name which I doubt it.

SJimenez218

This is what they recommend and I think I am going to go with their idea.Wedding Invitations and Children So you've made the decision about whether you're going to invite children to your wedding or not. The first suggestion is to be specific with regards to the wedding invitations and children. If you choose not to invite children, address the envelope to Mr. and Mrs. Guest. If you want to have children, invite The Guest Family. If you're not inviting children and the guests RSVP with the children included, call them and politely and diplomatically discuss the situation with them. In fact, if you're going to have an adults-only reception, it may be a good idea to telephone all of the guests with children beforehand to ensure they understand. This is also a good way for you to gauge how many people will be inconvenienced by not bringing their children. Try to be understanding--your decision to not include children at your wedding can cause stress. On the other hand, your guests have to similarly understand that you're not trying to be discriminatory, but you are planning YOUR special day, and you want it to be perfect.

mbcdefg

Wedding Paper Divas? I got my invites from them as well. I know they have a live chat feature on their website, so you could always ping them and ask. I saw some info about custom work, but that seemed to be for changing around the colors of the paper alignment of the text. Are you hiring a calligrapher? Maybe ask WDP to leave spaces and accept/decline checkboxes on the RSVP card, and then have the calligrapher fill in each guest's name.