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Wording for bookmarks - how does this sound?

With much thought and consideration, we have chosen a special way to say “Thank You” for sharing our wedding day with us.  A donation has been made in your honor to the Gift of Immunity Guild of Seattle Children’s Hospital.  For more information, please visit www.giftofimmunity.org/">www.giftofimmunity.org

Re: Wording for bookmarks - how does this sound?

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    felicia220felicia220 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Are you making them?  Or is this what is written on the one the charity provides?


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    uppereastgirluppereastgirl member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Just my thoughts -- they're definitely of the "take them or leave them" sort.

    "thought and consideration" is redundant.  "Consideration" is careful thought.  But I'd cut that out anyway because people will know that you thought about it.  "With much thought and consideration" sounds like a buffer at the beginning of bad news to me.  ("After much consideration, we have decided to cut salaries company-wide by 25%...")

    I sounds kind of odd and awkward to classify your own action/decision as "special".

    "thank you" should not be capitalized because it isn't a proper noun.

    image
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    felicia220felicia220 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I agree with uppereastgirl about the consideration thing
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