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Poll: Money Dance/Toss

I know this can get quite controversial, but for the sake of curiosity I'd like to know what all you ladies think about money dances/tosses...
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Re: Poll: Money Dance/Toss

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    uppereastgirluppereastgirl member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    What is a money toss?

    And why can't I vote?
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_wedding-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:90Discussion:dd5d0969-0ead-4d71-abb0-fbd5d581da4bPost:9953dffc-6f48-4aa1-ba0e-444ea9c40d7a">Re: Poll: Money Dance/Toss</a>:
    [QUOTE]What is a money toss? And why can't I vote?
    Posted by uppereastgirl[/QUOTE]

    I'm gonna guess it's your guests throwing money at you...anything related to your guests giving you money (other than their gift in the card they give you) is rude and unacceptable to me.
    ~Chelsea~
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    edited December 2011
    I think it's kind of tacky - They did do it at my friends wedding a few weeks ago... She didn't necessarily dance for dollars, but they randomly threw dollar bills at her and her DH. I think it was very much a part of their culture, and if that's something your family does, I don't think you should sacrafice it. We can Americanize everything, but I think it's nice to keep some ethnic traditions - If that's your case.
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_wedding-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:90Discussion:dd5d0969-0ead-4d71-abb0-fbd5d581da4bPost:be93ebb7-1ac0-459d-9a55-dbb5e062e8ee">Re: Poll: Money Dance/Toss</a>:
    [QUOTE]I think it's kind of tacky - They did do it at my friends wedding a few weeks ago... She didn't necessarily dance for dollars, but they randomly threw dollar bills at her and her DH. I think it was very much a part of their culture, and if that's something your family does, I don't think you should sacrafice it. We can Americanize everything, but I think it's nice to keep some ethnic traditions - If that's your case.
    Posted by jaimelody[/QUOTE]

    Because (and ONLY because) you brought it up, I'll admit that's why I asked.  My family is Greek and at all of the weddings on my mom's side it's a tradition to either pin money to the bride's dress or (because pins can obviously ruin a dress) do a money dance/toss.  I don't know how I feel about doing it just because from an etiquette standpoint I know it's very tacky, especially since guests have already shelled out money for a gift for the wedding and/or shower(s).  However, when FI heard about it he was really excited and I know that his side would most likely be totally on board with it (and the Greek side of my family definitely would).  If we did it, it would obviously be due to tradition and not greed, but I'm really having a hard time deciding what to do.  And it's not like we would insist that people contribute, but I know that at some point during the night when FI and I are dancing if someone initiates it by throwing money then everyone else will (unless FI and I put a stop to it).
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    edited December 2011
    IMO Money Toss Cheesy and bad...thats me though some religious nationalities see it as normal, since its not mine, I won't do it, and probably wouldn't participate at a wedding to do it.
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    noonescookienoonescookie member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    If you like the idea of honoring the culture, but not taking the money, perhaps you could do a money dance for charity? If you have your DJ or an attendant explain the cultural tradition, I don't think anyone will get offended. And, if it's for a charity you could make yourself a container to collect instead of allowing your guests to attach it to you.

    Either way, as long as you make sure your guests know what you're doing, and why, and that throwing money at you is optional, your nearest and dearest shouldn't hold it against you.

    The opposite question is, how would you go about keeping your Greek relatives from starting it? While you don't want to alienate guests who are unfamiliar with/would be offended by the money dance, you also don't want to alienate or insult your relatives.

    Oooh... just had a potentially cheesy, admittedly half-baked idea. What if you put out fake money at each place with an explanation on the back, "In some Greek families, like BRIDE's, it's traditional for relatives to pin money to the bride as a gift. We would be just as thrilled to receive your words of wisdom. If you'd like to contribute your '10 cents,' during the money dance, write your advice below and keep an eye on RELATIVE." That, or something like that, would explain the tradition to guests, and give them a way to participate without forcing cash out of them. I dunno. It was a thought.
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    DMLJDMLJ member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I second the charity idea.
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    leah2bleah2b member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    To preface this message, we will not be doing one and I have no desire to. However, it doesn't offend me.

    They do this often in polish cultures as well.  Also, other parts of the country it is more acceptable.  The whole thing stems from a tradition to bring the newly married couple good luck and fortune and financial security in their future. Usually they do not throw the money at you  but I think one of the attendants actually stands by and collects the money.  In any event, I recently went to a wedding where they did this. Both the bride and the groom danced with guests.  It was not awkward at all.  Lots of people participated, as did I.  Some people seemed to have a great time with it. 
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    edited December 2011
    My fiance is Macedonian and its a tradition for the guests to throw money at the bride and groom when they are dancing...however the bride and groom don't keep the money, instead they give that to the band sort of like another thank you for playing at the wedding.
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    edited December 2011
    I really don't know much about them, and have never been to a wedding where it is done. However, if it is the normal practice for a particular culture, then it is acceptable. If there are guests (like myself) who are unfamiliar with it, they just wouldn't partake. (Or would, if they felt like it)

    Although it's not something I would personally do (cause it's not part of my culture/background), I'm sure there are other aspects of my background that are unfamiliar to others.  If your family is comfortable with it, and has always been a part of weddings you attended growing up and have always pictured it as part of your wedding, then go for it. 

    Do know that some guests may be confused/shocked/unsure/possibly insulted if they think it's tacky and don't recognize other backgrounds - but if it is something YOU want, then do it. I think it also depends on how many guests are familiar with it vs. how many are not. 
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