How Many Guests Bring Actual Gifts to Wedding?

rlavach

Someone asked me if I was going to have a gift table at my reception & I said no. In the last 25 years of my life, I've rarely seen more than 2-3 guests bring actual gifts to a wedding. Most bring a card. I'm wondering if this is a Jersey thing, or maybe just all the people I know!

JoBell123

No one brought actual gifts to my wedding (though we would have put them on the table with the card box if they did).  Gifts were either from the registry and shipped to our home, or they made plans to give the gift to us before or after the wedding.

I will admit, I once brought an actual gift to the wedding, because I had missed the bridal shower and my friend and I just could not come up with a good time to get together and it was breakable so I was nervous to ship it (we'd plan and then the day before one of us would have to cancel...we were both in the last weeks before our weddings, it was crazy times), so I brought the shower gift there.  I left it in the car, then at the end of the wedding I ran out and got it, then I put it by their card box.

annandted86

I find that it varies wildly based on family and traditions.  I've been to weddings where I didn't see anything but the card box.  I've been to weddings where it looked more like a shower with a large pile of physical presents.

odonnellalys

I went to California for a wedding a few years back. I was told that the whole "cover your plate" didn't apply on the west coast, so we brought them an actual gift instead of money. We were told that on the West Coast, actual gifts for the home are wedding appropriate. The shower is intended for small "fun" gifts for the home, like board games and decorative items. I felt kind of silly not giving them money, but in the end, they appreciated our gift and thanked us for it. I feel bad now that they are coming to our wedding, but I feel that their presence is enough, and flying in from CA to be with us is plenty.

rlavach

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_many-guests-bring-actual-gifts-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:90Discussion:e21b1821-f823-4988-9870-4f1658e01f82Post:ffbf1496-cce7-4d59-bb5b-90526d6bfe47">Re: How Many Guests Bring Actual Gifts to Wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]I went to California for a wedding a few years back. I was told that the whole "cover your plate" didn't apply on the west coast, so we brought them an actual gift instead of money. <strong>We were told that on the West Coast, actual gifts for the home are wedding appropriate. The shower is intended for small "fun" gifts for the home, like board games and decorative items.</strong> I felt kind of silly not giving them money, but in the end, they appreciated our gift and thanked us for it. I feel bad now that they are coming to our wedding, but I feel that their presence is enough, and flying in from CA to be with us is plenty.
Posted by odonnellalys[/QUOTE]
Wow, that sounds so weird! I realized, from these boards, that covering your plate was a tri-state thing. But bringing a board game to a shower would feel weird. Unless matched with some other more useful items. I have a few family members in Cali too. I think they've been lying in the sun too much! Haha!

cindyn9178

This is definitely dependent on region, family and traditions.
I have never been to a wedding in my family, or in NJ where anybody gave anything other than money at the wedding.
But I've definitely heard of it being done in other locations.

We had a card box on a table for people to put cards in, so if by chance anybody DID bring a gift, they could put it there.

sgdc2011

We had a few gifts brought to us, but honestly most of our registry was bought prior to the wedding anyway, so there wasn't much left.

kristen8040

We had about four actual gifts, and they were placed on the card table.

Giaspo

I got one gift which was placed next to the card box, and I'm almost positive it was regifted!

rlavach

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_many-guests-bring-actual-gifts-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:90Discussion:e21b1821-f823-4988-9870-4f1658e01f82Post:859bd398-21db-4d46-ac3c-70b74268f37c">Re: How Many Guests Bring Actual Gifts to Wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]I got one gift which was placed next to the card box, and I'm almost positive it was regifted!
Posted by Giaspo[/QUOTE]
HAHAHA! That's hilarious. I agree with everyone's posts that really very few bring gifts. At the moment, 22 voted 0-20%. Pretty strong evidence, in my very unscientific poll.<div>
</div><div>I was planning on putting the cardbox on our sweetheart table so it's easily visible by both sets of parents. We don't want anyone swiping it! If there happens to be an extra table, I guess I'll put it there for the 5% who might bring gifts. Thanks everyone!</div>

Deidresmiles

Money is always an uncomfortable topic... I tried to get my dad to get a real present instead of a check.. its just not the same. If you think of being thoughtful,  is actually the best way to go.

kellybee83

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_many-guests-bring-actual-gifts-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:90Discussion:e21b1821-f823-4988-9870-4f1658e01f82Post:859bd398-21db-4d46-ac3c-70b74268f37c">Re: How Many Guests Bring Actual Gifts to Wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]I got one gift which was placed next to the card box, and I'm almost positive it was regifted!
Posted by Giaspo[/QUOTE]

That's too funny! We only got one gift as well.

Renee1105

We actually got 3 gifts. One was given at the reception (an ornament) with a card with money and two were sent to my parent's home.

shoebie

You should have enough room on the card table if some one happens to bring a gift. The last thing you want is for their gift to sit on the floor

kristen8040

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_many-guests-bring-actual-gifts-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:90Discussion:e21b1821-f823-4988-9870-4f1658e01f82Post:f6d45025-efa8-42a3-b192-9118c743883c">Re: How Many Guests Bring Actual Gifts to Wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]You should have enough room on the card table if some one happens to bring a gift. The last thing you want is for their gift to sit on the floor
Posted by shoebie420[/QUOTE]

<div>Not really sure why that's such a big deal, especially if it's a big gift.</div>

shoebie

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_many-guests-bring-actual-gifts-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:90Discussion:e21b1821-f823-4988-9870-4f1658e01f82Post:ee3c0c8a-5b8c-42a2-9812-09c1cfd875f7">Re: How Many Guests Bring Actual Gifts to Wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: How Many Guests Bring Actual Gifts to Wedding? : Not really sure why that's such a big deal, especially if it's a big gift.
Posted by kristen8040[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>What if its not such a big gift? I have seen people do small round tables for their card boxes that pretty much take up the whole table, and have seen people have to put their gift on the floor to where the matradee actually moved it under the table the couple was called the next morning and their parents went back to get the gift that was forgotten under the table cloth. I cant imagine being that guest and watching my gift get shoved under a table ..... is this rare yes probally a 1 and a 100 if not less ocassion can it happen yes. </div>

rlavach

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_many-guests-bring-actual-gifts-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:90Discussion:e21b1821-f823-4988-9870-4f1658e01f82Post:f6d45025-efa8-42a3-b192-9118c743883c">Re: How Many Guests Bring Actual Gifts to Wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]You should have enough room on the card table if some one happens to bring a gift. The last thing you want is for their gift to sit on the floor
Posted by shoebie420[/QUOTE]
Thing is, I wasn't really planning on having a card table. I have a birdcage for cards that I was going to put on the sweetheart table, that way both sets of parents can keep their eye on it so no one walks away with it. I guess now I need a separate table! 

cindyn9178

If I were a guest bringing a gift, went to the card box table and saw there were no other gifts there, I wouldn't just leave it there, I'd ask someone!

And the bride could also instruct the Maitre'd to put the gifts (if received) in one specific location so they don't get lost or forgotten.

I wouldn't make a big deal out of trying to provide a big table for the gifts that most people aren't bringing anyway.

ashlieandfrank

I voted 0-20%, as I got 2 gifts - however, on our honeymoon, we talked with another couple who said they only received gifts - NO money. It depends on where you are from (they were from the south and didn't know of anything different...).