Thank You etiquette- MIA gifts

agu101

We have a few people that did not bring gifts to our wedding.  A few claimed to have forgotten their gift and will be mailing it, but we have yet to receive those either.  We're getting ready to start writing out our thank you's.  What is the protocol- should we still send a thank you note to people just for coming to our wedding?  

Also, a gift from a very good family friend went missing the night of our wedding.  Last I heard their envelope was handed to a waiter at our venue along with some other people's envelopes at their table. We received all but that one envelope from their table. My parents are very upset about it and don't want to say anything to the couple.  They are fairly certain there was cash and not a check, which makes it much harder to trace.  We're assuming the proper thing to do would be to thank the couple for their gift and just cut our losses with that one.  Has anyone had a similar experience?  

Giaspo

Ooops.  I sent thank yous to guests who didn't give a gift...they traveled a long way and I didn't expect a gift, and I wanted to thank them for making the effort (plus one was a reader so I thanked her for that). 

klustig

Honestly, I couldn't disagree more. You need to thank everyone who came to your wedding, gift or not. There's a lot of effort that goes into attending someone else's affair, and it's really not right to not thank them for coming.

Ginabean42712

True etiquette would have you write out thank you cards to everyone who attended, regardless if they brought a gift or not.  However, no matter what my financial circumstances were, I would never attend a wedding without giving some sort of gift.  That being said, I did not send thank you's to the people who didn't give a gift at my wedding.  

As for the one envelope that got lost at your wedding, did you bring it up to you venue?  Maybe they have cameras in the venue and could go back to see if any of the waiters pocketed the envelope. You should deffinetely send a thank you to the couple who's gift got lost.  

mrsR12

We are writing thank you to all who attended, even some who did not bring gifts (did not travel far).  

I think you might want to contact the venue just to "double check", in case they've gotten similar questions before about the same wait staff.  

HobokensFury

We wrote thank yous to everyone that came, even those that didn't bring a gift. Make no mention of the gift.  Write something like thank you for sharing our special day with us.

michellej2011

I had the same problem with some guests. We were married in July 2011 and gifts trickled in until August this year (2012). When we sent out thank you's, we sent them out to everyone. For the people we did not get a gift from at the time, we just thanked them for coming to our wedding. When we received the gifts later on, we sent a second thank you for the gift.