New Jersey

Frustrated - Sorry for the Rant but I'm tired of being the " Go-to" Person

My FI and myself have pretty much handled everything for the wedding ourselves. However, throughout the process my mother has felt that she hasn't be "involved." Now, she is the mother of the groom so she understands that she takes a little bit of the backseat to the parents of the bride. Plus my future MIL is a strong willed woman and she can overpower some people. So I try to think of ways for my mom to get some involvement. She has felt left out in the past because her relationship with my brother wasn't the best and my brother did a justice of the piece. I have compassion on her and I understand that it's tough not having a daughter. So I thought she could help with the ceremony programs. Now I already formatted, typed out and printed out each panel to the wedding program ( we are doing a 5 panel, fan program, 90 total programs). I printed all this stuff out and organized it in seperate boxes and sent it over to my future MIL's house. I told my mother to please call early this morning to schedule some time for the two of them to link up today and start putting together the programs. We're 3 days out and I still have to type out and print all the seating cards so I was hoping that they can handle this without me. Of course I give my mother a call at 5:30pm....and she hasn't even called my future MIL to schedule a time. Classic.  This is why I just do things myself. Now I gotta play parent and start following up on every little thing because this is a clear sign that somebody else is going to drop the ball on the other items. Quick....someone find my cape.

Re: Frustrated - Sorry for the Rant but I'm tired of being the " Go-to" Person

  • edited December 2011
    First of all, I know many of the girls have said it on here already, but you are a fabulous person for doing all of this!  My FI is a great guy but I do not think he would even know where to begin- printing, organizing, panels... love it!  So unfortunately you are the go-to person and it sucks (trust me) but you will be rewarded when your wedding is the most beautiful day in your life.  I can tell from reading your posts you are not cutting any corners just because you are a guy (not to sound so stereotypical but most of the time its the bride doing all the planning and the grooms do not care much about the detail). 

    As for following up with everything, you might just want to do that anyways because you are so close to your wedding.  I would just call your mom and say "will you have time to do this otherwise I will handle it, etc".  I know it feels like you are doing everything, but like i said, it will all be worth it. Hang in there and have a great wedding day!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • rlavachrlavach member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I already feel that way and we're 8 months out! It does suck to be the only person who seems to keep on schedule and remember deadlines, but at this point, it may be the only way to keep your sanity. 

    It may sound childish, b/c they really should be able to do this themselves, but maybe you could set up an appt for the two mothers to meet yourself. That way, there's no excuses. If it were me, I'd even call that night to make sure things are going smoothly and that they didn't forget. 

    Being the responsible one brings a lot of pressure, but at least it's only for a few more days...then you'll get married and have a great honeymoon! Hang in there!! 
  • edited December 2011
    Thank you!! The mothers are working on them today. Of course there was a typo and I had to redo the whole set of one of the panels. If they would have contacted me early I wouldn't have to rush over to Michaels seconds before their 9pm closing. lol

    Hoepfulyl they wrap this stuff up. Off to pick my future FIL up so the both of us can try our tuxes on. His health ain't the best and really can't drive around as much anymore. a car.....alone....Uh Oh. lol  j/k  hopefully he won't drive me too nuts.
  • edited December 2011
    I appreciate the compliments ladies. Both my parents are artistic and despite being a lifelong athlete, my mom spent a lot of time teaching me about the arts and making me do puzzles when I was younger. I guess they turned me into this detail freak. I took a lot of flak for it from my friends. I think I was the only linebacker in football that understood what abstract impressionism was. Laughing
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