POLL-- DO or DON'T? Dollar Dance!

xtinazeternity

I originally did not want to do the dollar dance at our ballroom reception because I did not want to take money from our guests that had to pay enough as it is on traveling to Vegas. 

I went to a wedding today (1-1-11!) and a my friend who is also getting married in 2012 sat next to me and we talked wedding the whole time.  She asked about the dollar dance and said we should totally do it.  I am considering it now... I think it would be fiun and we could use some extra money for the slots.  Was thinking if we did it- we might specify one dollar dance- so people don't feel obligated to give a lot. 

What do you think?

direy25

The main question for me - is the dollar dance common in your circle? I had never heard of it until I started posting on the Knot and my first thought was that it seemed super tacky. BUT, if this is something that your guests are accustomed to then it really is up to you. Unfortunately when I think of a dollar dance in Vegas, I'm definitely not thinking of a wedding, if you know what I mean...

xtinazeternity

LOL!

I have been to 4 weddings in the past 5 years and 2 of them had the dollar dance (if that is what its called... i dont even know).

I don't know what you mean by "your circle"-- I'm just a normal American living in Arizona. I just it was something a lot of people did...?  That is exactly why I am taking the poll!  

Thanks for the feedback!!

direy25

I guess I mean your circle of friends? Now that I typed that it sounds a little lame. I just don't think it would be very well received by my family / friends because it's not a common tradition in our group. I also don't like the idea of asking for money after our guests have already spent so much to attend. So I probably didn't really help but I've also had a few glasses of wine, lol...

stinkerbell6879

Honestly only do it if it's common among your friends and family's weddings. IF it is not then they will think it's tacky, IF it's done then they won't care. In my family it's normal, but because of it being a DW I felt it was not appropriate.

xtinazeternity

I don't really know if there is anything common amoung my circle of friends or family... we are all very diverse- gay, straight, wealthy, poor, some more ethnic.. etc.  We have friends and family of all different backgrounds.  That is why it is hard. 

This poll really helps- I love the knotties!  It looks like most people are confirming my original thought was right- its' too tacky for a destination wedding!  I'll keep the poll going!  

I really liked the idea of dancing for 30 sec- 1min with a ton of guests as the dollar dance goes.  Wonder of I could still do it, but just not call it a dance for money....?

guamibear

I think it's a common thing to do. The last wedding I went to  in DC had one because the groom's family requested to have it. I think either way is fine. I'm undecided on it myself. It's common enough where most people will likely know what it is, but if you skipped it, no one would likely take issue.

j_jaye

Where I come from it is not very common and when it does happen it is at the wedding of people of European descent. Basically it is excepted if you are of european decent but for everyone else it is not. We even have a Nurofen (asprin) ad on TV here that shows a money dance and a thoughful guest attaches a packet of nurfen to the the girls dress amongst all the cash! Funny though all the notes are Euros which goes to show that it must be a European tradition.

vegasgroom

I've been to lots of friends' weddings over the past few years and had never seen the dollar dance, hadn't heard of it until this website; I think it's tacky and can't imagine doing it but some people like it.

Gribbles

If it not tradition amongst your family and friends I would definitely not do it - it will seem gift grabby and tacky - and imagine if noone knew what the purpose was, and you didn't get any money pinned on you - that would be really embarrassing.

Also, isnt the money given considered a wedding gift? As a guest I wouldn't be too pleased that you would use it as 'slot money'...! But thats just my opinion.

jb51411

I totally agree with Gribbles and VG. If it isn't part of your culture it is tacky. I have never been to wedding that had one. I also second Gribbles with the "slot money". Cash gifts are there to help you start your life together, not to gamble it all away.

wiwicaty

I most definitely don't think it's a european tradition. I'm fully European and even though I can only speak for Italy and France I have never heard of or seen a "dollar dance" in my life. Ever so often people attribute the weirdest things to other cultures and then try to incorporate them in their event as something "exotic". I read a post on another board a few months ago in which the bride to be wanted her guests to dance around the cake because she had heard it was a strong italian tradition. I swear I laughed so hard I was in tears.

Anyways, to stick to the point, I don't know how it works exactly but it sounds a bit too tacky to me. 

RachNRich

You're already asking friends/family to travel for your wedding. Chances are you have a registry, too. There's no point in asked (literally) for more money. It's just plain 'ole tacky!

Kmills811

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_poll-dont-dollar-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:bb6f6619-3d2d-40a7-902e-483fefb12004Post:174369f4-36e3-46a0-9811-c61d9edcc607">Re: POLL-- DO or DON'T? Dollar Dance!</a>:
[QUOTE]You're already asking friends/family to travel for your wedding. Chances are you have a registry, too. There's no point in asked (literally) for more money. It's just plain 'ole tacky!
Posted by RachNRich[/QUOTE]

Exactly what she said. Super tacky!

aerinpegadrak

I really wouldn't.  Even if it is traditional, I think it's rude to ask your guests to open their wallets for anything at your wedding.  The dollar dance came from a time where attending a wedding meant waking up, putting on the nicest thing you owned, and walking out to the village green, and the money given in the dollar dance would be the only gift you gave.  Now people tend to buy gifts or give cash separately, not to mention having to spend money on travel, hotel, time off work, sometimes new clothes, pre-parties...  It's really no longer an appropriate thing to ask of people.  There are plenty of ways to combine the good parts of the dance (tradition, getting one-on-one time with your guests) while omitting the bad parts (money changing hands).

ricekim

Almost every wedding I've been to has had a dollar dance and I roll my eyes every time. I think it's tacky to ask people for money if they have already travelled and brought a gift.

ebonyivory10

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_poll-dont-dollar-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:91Discussion:bb6f6619-3d2d-40a7-902e-483fefb12004Post:6c125bca-8780-46cc-b547-7d23461d374a">Re: POLL-- DO or DON'T? Dollar Dance!</a>:
[QUOTE] I also second Gribbles with the "slot money". Cash gifts are there to help you start your life together, not to gamble it all away.
Posted by jb51411[/QUOTE]

Well really once you give cash as a wedding gift, it's up to the couple to do what they want with it. Unfortunately you can't really dictate how someone uses cash once you give it.

That being said, I would not participate in a dollar dance or have one at my wedding. They are not common or traditional where I'm from so I don't care for them.

xtinazeternity

Thanks everyone!  I will not have a dallar dance!  That was my original thought to begin with- we don't need our friends money and it means so much to us that are traveling to share our day.  I actually told me MIL that I did not want to register for gifts because I didn't want gifts from our friends.  She insisted that we do, because there will be people who will want to bring gifts. 

j_jaye

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_poll-dont-dollar-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:bb6f6619-3d2d-40a7-902e-483fefb12004Post:75e8fb28-a3d8-4be3-a201-bfdd8a492737">Re: POLL-- DO or DON'T? Dollar Dance!</a>:
[QUOTE]I most definitely don't think it's a european tradition. I'm fully European and even though I can only speak for Italy and France I have never heard of or seen a "dollar dance" in my life. Ever so often people attribute the weirdest things to other cultures and then try to incorporate them in their event as something "exotic". I read a post on another board a few months ago in which the bride to be wanted her guests to dance around the cake because she had heard it was a strong italian tradition. I swear I laughed so hard I was in tears. Anyways, to stick to the point, I don't know how it works exactly but it sounds a bit too tacky to me. 
Posted by wiwicaty[/QUOTE]

It is of Eastern European descent....Poland, Croatia etc

thefuturemrsrumley

We didn't do any of those traditions:money dance, bouquet toss, or garter toss.  Just wasn't our thing. 

danilynnae

I have the same concerns. But everyone I have talked to family/friends/wedding coordinator say that I should do one and my guests will be disappointed if we don't. I couldn't care less about the $... just want everyone to be happy.
Here is an idea though. Please tell me what you think. Our venue is the Art Museum in downtown. It is a beautiful building, but of course they don't make any money. The cost of having my wedding/reception there is a great deal and the facility manager has been awesome with everything. Thinking of announcing our dollar dance as a donation to the museum? Any thoughts?