Bridal Shower Guest List question - part 2

cmac3504

While we're on this topic...... I know it is customary that only people invited to the wedding are to be invited to the bridal shower.... however, two of my FSILs threw a fit when they found out kids were not invited to our wedding.  FI has four nieces.. one is 18 (she's invited to the wedding) and the others are 10, 3.5, and 1.5.  Does this seem like a good time to "break the rule" and invite the younger nieces to the shower so that they can feel included in some part of the wedding?  Besides the fact that it's sort of against the rules (note that my FILs are NOT people that are big on etiquette..) FI also has two nephews (9 and 4.5) so I don't know if somehow they'd feel left out.

So I'm too lazy to set up a poll, but I supposed my options are to
1) Invite the nieces
2) Don't invite the nieces
3) Ask the FSILs during the holidays if they'd like to bring the girls to the shower. (aka put the ball in their court)

FYI- I don't even know if it's an actual option to invite all the nieces AND nephews considering it's a traditional shower with just women but even if it is an option, I wouldn't go with it

kamarks08

I would probably put the ball in their court if I were in this situation. I don't think it's such a big etiquette killer since their kids. If her kids were like 24, 26, etc, then I would say you'd have to invited them to the wedding and the shower. Since their kids, I would just make it known that they are fully welcome to the shower if they would like to come. That way, whether or not they choose to is all up to them. Good luck with that

elidellio

I agree. I'm not technically inviting my nieces to my shower but I'm giong to make sure my sister knows they can come if she wants them to. I'd be happy for them to be there but I think she might like a little time out on her own...lol

cmac3504

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_march-2012-weddings_bridal-shower-guest-list-question-part-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:955e4823-0be1-44ef-9ee7-99a63794e103Discussion:a14eabd8-9ea3-4303-ae1f-504c377f56a1Post:367cc567-0a25-4ac1-a640-3b4c0a163218">Re: Bridal Shower Guest List question - part 2</a>:
[QUOTE]How are bridal showers in your area/family usually done?  Ours are adults only.
Posted by HobokenBride2012[/QUOTE]

Funny you ask because I've never been to one, so I'm not sure!! I guess part of me felt like having no kids at the wedding was what really mattered to me, so I'd be open to letting the kids come.... on the other hand, do you usually get lingerie type gifts?? While I could never see anyone on my side of the family giving me a risque (sp?) gift at the shower, you never know... Is that why some showers are adults only?

HobokensFury

How are bridal showers in your area/family usually done?  Ours are adults only.

HobokensFury

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_march-2012-weddings_bridal-shower-guest-list-question-part-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:955e4823-0be1-44ef-9ee7-99a63794e103Discussion:a14eabd8-9ea3-4303-ae1f-504c377f56a1Post:17d424b7-6e64-4d47-aea1-63891daaa2eb">Re: Bridal Shower Guest List question - part 2</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Bridal Shower Guest List question - part 2 : Funny you ask because I've never been to one, so I'm not sure!! I guess part of me felt like having no kids at the wedding was what really mattered to me, so I'd be open to letting the kids come.... on the other hand, do you usually get lingerie type gifts?? While I could never see anyone on my side of the family giving me a risque (sp?) gift at the shower, you never know... Is that why some showers are adults only?
Posted by cmac3504[/QUOTE]

That is one of the reasons.  Some games/gifts may not be PG but you know your guests best.

brittandjp

Honestly, I don't want children at my bridal shower. We are inviting them to the wedding, but I'd like an adults only shower.

cmac3504

Thanks for your input!!! I'll have to talk to my mom/ sister and FSILs separately over the holidays to see what everyone expects out of the shower.  I suppose I don't care either way if it's a PG party or not but I'd be interested in seeing what others are used to before deciding if the nieces will make the guest list. 

mrsmustard12

Personally, I wouldn't want little kids at my shower since it is an adult type of party.  I wouldn't invite them.