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Hotel dilema

Hey allSo while my mother was up visiting last month she kept talking  about how she just wanted to stay at our apartment during the time of the wedding. And I kept argueing back with her that even I am not staying at my place the night before. But that things could be potentially choatic and it would be best for everyone to have a hotel room to stay in for that weekend (keep in mind we are arguing over something still over a year away)But she still thinks that she and two of my three sisters plus my sisters two kids should be staying at our place. WellI  thought it was just my crazy mom who didn't believe a hotel was the right choice. But then I was talking to a friend of mine and we got to talking about the wedding, and he seemed shocked that he and his GF would need to get a hotel room. he figured they could "just crash at our place"how and when (STDs or invites) do I tell people that they aren't to stay at my house that weekend? I'm afraid a suggestion of hotel options isn't going to get the point across to several of my friends/family
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Re: Hotel dilema

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    edited December 2011
    I didn't have this particular issue as my mother decreed no one would stay at their house so early on, no one crossed it. I did create a website with all of the information for the wedding blocks, etc, and put it on every piece of paper I have sent out, and in emails to invitees.  That way people know which ones to go with without you sending out all this paper to people.
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    edited December 2011
    I think it's crazy that people actually think you would want people crashing at your place the weekend of your wedding.  As if you don't have enough to do without worrying about guests!!Do the hotel options - and if people bring up staying at your place - let them know it's not an option, and to spread the word.Say you're sorry that they have to pay for a room, but with everything going on, plus the fact you won't even be staying there yourself the night of the wedding - you just can't worry about having guests.  I can't imagine trying to deal with people at the house the day before or morning of the wedding.
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    edited December 2011
    I think it's ridiculous that guests expect to stay at your house! I would never expect that, let alone make a comment to you about it! As pps mentioned, create a wedding website and have a list of hotel blocks (mention that they are even discounted if that's the case). In the invitations, have an insert of the hotels as well. I think that's pretty much all you can do- if they mention about staying at your place, just be firm about it. Good luck!
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    d78d78
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    edited December 2011
    I had one friend stay with us during our wedding. We stayed at a nearby hotel on the wedding night and she also had a room there. To be brutally honest, once she actually got there (drama there!), I enjoyed having her there to calm my nerves. BUT, she was only one person, and not someone who annoys me or would judge me if my house weren't immaculate. :-)
    BabyFruit Ticker
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    LaFemmeRousseLaFemmeRousse member
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    edited December 2011
    Yikes!  I too can't believe that people (especially people who aren't related to you!) would expect to stay at your house before the wedding.  Agreed with PP, just emphasize the room blocks and local hotels in all your wedding information, and speak directly to the people you know are planning to stay with you already- remind them that you won't be staying there, the house will be crazy during that time, you and your FI have plans that will keep you out of the apartment and you can't be worrying about everyone else being able to get in and out, etc.  Be firm!
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    McBridetobeMcBridetobe member
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    edited December 2011
    Never in a million years would I assume that I could stay with the bride and groom the weekend of their wedding.  How crazy.Do you guys have any other friends/family in Pittsburgh that they could crash with?  In our group of friends, we often will share hotel rooms for weddings to keep down on the costs. 
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    elishanbelishanb member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Yea so far I (including my mother and two sisters and two kids) there are 10 people that have said something to me about just "crashing at our place" it's really starting to drivbe me crazy and I am SO worried that they aren't going to get a hotle and then just show up expecting to stay which means big drama   MY MOH is coming to stay with us the week before the wedding but she's only one person and her an dI will be staying in a hotel the night b4. Do you think it's ok to put hotle info with the STDs just to start to get the point across and hopefully people will take the hint and reserve a room?
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    elishanbelishanb member
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    edited December 2011
    see me not being from here means a lot of the people that are coming in to town haven't even met the people that are already here that I know. So I think it would be weird to have them stay with them I think the hotel(s) is the best option.
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    edited December 2011
    Do you think it's ok to put hotle info with the STDs just to start to get the point across and hopefully people will take the hint and reserve a room?Absolutely, esp. in your case!
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    d78d78
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    edited December 2011
    You can absolutely hope they'll take the hint, but don't expect it! ;-) And if you get any more "crashing at your place" talk, immediately say you won't have the space, which is surely true, because you'll have your dress, decorations, etc. and it'll all take up some room!
    BabyFruit Ticker
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    LaFemmeRousseLaFemmeRousse member
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    edited December 2011
    I think it's quite common to put info about your hotel blocks on the STD- I plan to do it as well.  Usually, I love getting as much information about a wedding as early as possible so I can make all my plans! 
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    edited December 2011
    Wow I would never expect to stay at the bride or grooms place right before the wedding. It would be so hectic. I can't believe someone even asked you this. Right from the start I would make it clear that there are hotel blocks, and you won't be available to entertain or house anyone for the weekend... my goodness.
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    edited December 2011
    I'd get a list of all the local hotels if they come bags in hand and ask to crash.  I'm sure hotels that still have vacancies will give great rates to these last minute "planners."
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    elishanbelishanb member
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    edited December 2011
    good ideas. Thanks so much for making me feel ok to tell people to stay somewhere else. I mean I love these people but I love my sanity too.
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    EmilyBerdellEmilyBerdell member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    WOW. That's really crazy that all these people expect to crash with you during your wedding. I'd never think that was a viable option as an out of town guest. I think putting the info on your STD is a must, but you really need to verbally let the people already mentioning that to you know that it's not going to happen. Just sending out the info and hoping they get the hint will likely not work. GL!
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    elishanbelishanb member
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    edited December 2011
    EMily- you are totally right. the people that ahve alredy mentioned it to me I was quick to point them in the hotel direction and most of them have said that they understand so I'm hoping that there aren't any other out there planning on asking me to stay
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    edited December 2011
    Yeah definitely look into arranging for a block of rooms at the nearest hotel. And include that info on your website AND as an insert  in your official invites.  Like:There are rooms available at X hotel for a discounted rate of $$$. Rooms may be reserved by calling ### and must be reserved by Y date. Mention the Elishanb wedding for discount. Usually my brother & his family stay with my parents when they come to Pittsburgh, but my parents are going to pay for them to stay at the hotel. My mom was like no way are we dealing with all of us getting ready with one bathroom and 2 little kids. 
    Crosswalk
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    edited December 2011
    I agree with others...that's just insane they expect to stay with you.  I'd do the hotel block, send it in the invites and on wedding website.  if anyone still says they are staying with you, just say that it's going to be a very hectic, stressful weekend, and you jsut can't take anything else on that weekend.GL!
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