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Ever hear of this?

My FI told me a crazy story that his friend is going to get his girlfriend an e-ring.  They discussed the Cs and style she wants. However, he said that they discussed that she would get him a gift equivalent to the cost of the ring!  FI claims that the friend said it's the new "thing" to do.I've heard of a small gift exchange the day of the wedding, but never the equivalent to the ring as a seperate gift!  Am I not with the program?  Has anyone heard of this?

Re: Ever hear of this?

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    edited December 2011
    I bought my DH golf clubs as an engagement gift.  My cousin had bought her DH a nice watch when she got engaged and I thought it was a sweet idea.  Um, but they were nowhere near the cost of a ring.  :P
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    edited December 2011
    I told E I would buy him a PS3 after we got engaged. it is his X-Mas present. Not even close to the cost of a ring though.
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    bel138bel138 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    FI has an engagement ring. And I knit him a blanket. My ring is not a diamond, so it wasn't expensive at all. I would say his ring plus my time spent knitting add up to the value of mine. :)
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    edited December 2011
    My sister bought her husband a watch, but again, no the same price point.
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    edited December 2011
    Ha ha, my DH wanted a Rolex in return for the e-ring he bought. I told him no :-P He ended up with a pretty expensive and very nice wedding band though, so he is happy. There always seem to be new trends in wedding planning that just help spend more money. Ridiculous.
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    edited December 2011
    Oh my!  I have never heard that....I hope my FI doesn't find out about this new "thing" ;)   He is getting me a gift on our day and I am paying for him to have his sleeve of tattoos done.... By far not as expensive as my ring!  
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    edited December 2011
    No way, my DH spent too much money on my ring for me to return the favor.  I gave him a nice watch as a wedding gift and he didn't get me a wedding gift at all, so we're kind of even.DH even bought his own wedding ring, lol.
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    Er&JerLemEr&JerLem member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    No way!  I didn't get DH an engagement gift (did get him a wedding gift, nowhere near the cost of my e-ring).  But it sounds like just another way to spend money.  In my head - the ring isn't so much a gift as it is a symbol.  I don't think it's something like getting someone a Christmas present - where you feel guilty if you don't have something in return.And to say it has to be the equivalent cost is completely nuts in my mind.
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    pinksonyapinksonya member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My DH refuses for me to know anything about the cost of my ring.  I don't even have a clue how much it was.  I kind of like it that way.  I gave him a card/little gift.  Never heard of buying a gift of equal value!  He enjoyed giving it to me and bought it because it was something he wanted to do.  He wouldn't want anything in return.
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    blush2422blush2422 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Thank goodness!  I was worried that I was neglecting my FI!
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    bel138bel138 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I could have never accepted a gift this extravagant without reciprocating. Especially since our finances weren't and still aren't merged. I also threatened him within an inch of his life that I would not accept a ring that cost over $500, though.
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    edited December 2011
    Heck no! I didn't buy DH anything for our engagement. He spent way more money than I even had at that point and time :p I did, however, buy him a Movado watch for our wedding. 
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    jennybean2010jennybean2010 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    goodness no! i didn't even promise to buy him something after we got engaged. FI doesn't want anything materialistic, just time to play warcraft without me bugging him. seriously. i'm doing bpics for him for his wedding gift, and he bought me a wii a couple of months ago as my wedding gift. he had no idea couples exchanged gifts for their wedding, so he was unhappy he was going to have to get me something else anyways. i know what the cost of my ring was (had to deal with the receipts afterwards to get it fixed when a diamond fell out) and there is no need for us to spend that amount of money all over again.
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    cobrien1976cobrien1976 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I did not buy anything for FI for his engagement gift and we are not exchanging gifts prior to the wedding either. Our honeymoon is our gift to ourselves.
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    edited December 2011
    I've never heard of this, so obviously we didn't do it. We just exchanged gifts for the wedding. I agree with Jbee- it's ridiculous that people keeping coming up with new trends just to pump more $ into the wedding industry.
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    snorgesnorge member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I still owe FI an engagement gift, and he jokes that we can't get married until it's ready--it's an extraordinarily complicated cross-stitch tapestry that he picked out truly ages ago...I've been working on it off and on for years, and am maybe 1/4 of the way done with it. But that's because I wanted to give him an engagement gift, not because it was a trend (I've never heard of that).
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    edited December 2011
    Agree with Snorge - I wanted to do something for FI...I didn't do it because it was expected or because someone told me to.  :P  And that was back in the days when I had a salary and he was a poor grad student.  :)
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    edited December 2011
    Agree with Snorge - I wanted to do something for FI...I didn't do it because it was expected or because someone told me to. :PSame here. Plus, I waited until X-Mas to do it as a non-wedding-related gift.
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    edited December 2011
    I got DH Big Lebowski cufflinks and that made him smile. No need to do more than something personal.
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    d78d78
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Haha! DH tried to talk me into getting him a quad or dirtbike in exchange for my engagement ring. I laid the smack down on him. (JK!)I see no need for it, and am guessing that FI's friend is trying to start a new trend for selfish men. lol
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    edited December 2011
    We didn't do it, but I think it is a new trend. I've heard of a bunch of our "upper" crust friends who did it. Besides, out here in Jersey (and I *think* also in PA), the ring, as long as it is not given on a holiday, is legally considered a contract and not a gift. It is seen as an intent to marry and has to be given back if the wedding doesn't occur.
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    hey_its_jennhey_its_jenn member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    No engagement gift but we did wedding gifts - but no where near the amt of the ring(s).  I got him some old comic books he's been looking for and he got me a gift card to Lowe's and a roll of toilet paper.  That sounds odd  but the GC is to use for stuff for our 2nd bathroom we plan to put it and the toilet paper "must be the first roll used"... haha.


    Married 9/19/09
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    October 2012: DH Dx: Testicular Cancer -- Left Orchiectomy
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    January 2013: Starting the adoption process!

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    edited December 2011
    I bought FI a guitar he'd had his eye on when he got me my e-ring.  As with everyone else, it's nowhere near the cost of my ring, but I wanted to get him something to show how happy I was:-)
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    AMK2009AMK2009 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    No way!  I'm glad DH didn't expect anything.  We didn't discuss getting engaged before we did.  The morning of our wedding I gave him a card and a nerds rope.And like someone else already said, I have no clue what my engagement ring cost anyway. 
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    elishanbelishanb member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I've never heard of this. FI would not be down for this, I think he's too "old fashioned" for an engagement gift for himself. He thinks of the HM as wedding gifts for each other, although I think it would be nice for me to be able to buy him something for the wedding, but I look for any reason to buy him something, I love spending money on him. I kind of love spending money. :-/
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