Wedding Invitations & Paper

confusing family member title issue for programs

Ok, I'm not sure if this is the correct place to post this but considering it should only affect the ceremony program, I figured this should be the best place. Be prepared to get lost in this, I'm sorry ahead of time but I will try my best to make it easily understandable. When I was a baby I was taken away from my biological mother. My grandparents (which were her parents) then adopted me and cut ties with her. They had kept it a secret from me until I was about 12 years old. So, because I had no idea, I always had considered my grandparents to be my parents, my aunt and uncle to be my sister and brother, and my cousins to be my niece and nephews. They, too, considered me to be their daughter, brother, sister and aunt... After I learned about what had happened, we still considered each other to be those things except for my niece and nephews (of which the niece is a month younger than me but the nephews are older than me, the oldest being nearly 20 years older) who instead of being only my niece and nephews, then changed to them being niece, nephew, or cousin interchangeably, partially due to age differences. Infact, my one nephew/cousin calls me his CuzAunt. So the problem lies with my nephew/cousin being my officiant and my niece/cousin being my maid of honor.... How should I address them in the program? It isn't too awkward to call Ashley my niece since she is only a month younger than me. However, Bryan is 7 years older than me (he is the one that calls me his CuzAunt). Any input on what I should do would be great. Obviously my side if the family understands, but I'm not sure if my fiancee's side would understand. Thanks a lot! Sorry it is such a long post!
May 2013 August Siggy: Hair Inspiration
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Re: confusing family member title issue for programs

  • I think you have a couple of the opinions.  You could use the relationship that you and the other person are most comfortable with.  You could use the relationship that requires the least explanation to other people.  You could not put familial relationships in the program for bridal party members.  I think doing what's easiest and most natural for you would be best.  I don't think a lot of people will be looking to you for explanations on your wedding day.
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  • Honestly, I'd skip listing relations at all. You can just put Maid of Honor...Ashley Last Name. There's no need to list how you know these people.

    If you do want relations listed, I would ask them what they prefer. I doubt that anyone will be overly concerned with who these people are, so don't worry too much about it :)
  • Thanks, I think I'm over analyzing it.. I just figured that it was proper etiquette to put relations on the program... It'd be nice to put relations because his sister and nieces will also be in the bridal party so maybe I will ask them what they prefer or just not put anything. Thanks!
    May 2013 August Siggy: Hair Inspiration
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  • Also, it's not totally uncommon for neices/nephews have younger aunts/uncles.  It's become a little more common for people to have "late in life" babies.  So I would just ask them which they prefer, since you are obviously all very close to each other!
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