Pennsylvania-Pittsburgh

Good bye high horse, hello humble pie...

I'm 48 years old and I have always been extremely proud of the fact that I have never tasted alcohol -- of any kind.  No wine, no wine coolers, no champagne, no beer - nothing!I will admit to thinking I was a saint in that fashion and liked to sit up on my high horse and purse my lips and "tsk tsk."  Yeah, I did that.My daughter's in-laws hosted the rehearsal dinner at the Church Brew Works on Thursday evening.  The waitress came around to our table and asked us for our drink orders.  It was extremely noisy and I asked for "a ginger ale or 7Up."  I don't know why I got all fancy and ordered this - I always order Pepsi or Coke.  I guess I wanted to be classy or something. ;)The waitress said, "We have Seagram's, is that ok?"  I shrugged and said, "Sure, that's fine" as I wondered to myself, 'Isn't ginger ale just ginger ale."She brought our drinks to us and I grabbed the glass and just started slurping on that straw like there was no tomorrow.  I was extremely thirsty - so I kept drinking and drinking and drinking.  After the 3 hit on the straw, my throat started to burn and I had this horrible taste in my mouth.I was sitting beside the Pastor's wife and she noticed my scrunched up face and  said, "What's wrong, is your ginger ale bitter?"  I took another drink and said, "This is horrible ginger ale."She said, "Maybe they make their own, let me try it."  I passed the drink over to her - she takes a swig and makes the same face.  My husband is sitting across from me and said, "I think you have an alcoholic drink."  He takes the glass, takes a drink and says, "You are drinking...... whiskey!"I started to get tears in my eyes.  I was stunned, shocked and sad all at once.  My son-in-law was sitting right beside me, my son across from him and my daughter beside him.  They have these horrified expressions on their faces.  I think they were waiting for me to go ballistic.  My SIL then said, "This is the best and happiest day of my life."  Through my mist of tears, I reached over and patted his arm and asked, "Why?  Because you are marrying my daughter tomorrow?""No," he roared.  "I just got to watch you drink whiskey!  You can never, ever again say, 'I'm 48 and I've never tasted alcohol.'  You drank whiskey!"I had two options:  I could pitch a unholy fit and make a scene or I could find humor in the situation like my SIL did.I chose laughter.  I bent over double and howled.  My kids howled with me.  The Pastor and his wife lost it.  The bridesmaids were next.  The groomsmen and my daughter's in-laws were at another table and soon chimed in with peals of merriment.My son said, "I'm telling Grandma!"  I sent the drink back with the apologetic server and she returned with a ginger ale.Hours later, as we prepared to leave, one of the bridesmaids asked if she could leave her gown with me to take to the Chapel.  I jokingly said, "No way."  She replied, "I don't know what happened to you.  You used to be so sweet, now you're nothing but a mean drunk."By the time the reception began, I think 85% of the people knew the story.  Everyone wanted to buy me a 7 on 7.  I've learned my lesson - next time I will keep my holier-than-thou comments and thoughts to myself.  Oh - and I'm still sticking with Pepsi, btw.

Re: Good bye high horse, hello humble pie...

  • edited December 2011
    Lol, what a memorable story you have to share! I'm glad you could find humor in it. My DH is the same way- as never drank alcohol and never wants to. Heck, he's so picky, he probably wouldn't even like it if he tried!
  • edited December 2011
    Oh Pam, I'm so sorry this is how you fell off the wagon!  I'm glad you were able to find humor in the situation and that this "You used to be so sweet, now you're nothing but a mean drunk" made you laugh too (because that is funny). 
  • morainemommorainemom member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Kim, I didn't like the taste of alcohol at all.Yeah, it was funny.  I can be a little self-righteous prick sometimes and I totally deserved to be knocked down several pegs.The kids all want to take me bar hopping now. *lol*I did call my Mom on the drive home and tell her the story. (She's only tasted alcohol once, when she was a kid and she took a drink from her step-father's beer.)  She had to laugh ad shared the story with all of the guest riding the bus on the way down to the Chapel.That story just spread like wildfire.
  • edited December 2011
    Seagrams was definitely not a good choice to "experience" alcohol for the first time....eeewwwrrss! Even I would spit that puppy out.
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  • LaFemmeRousseLaFemmeRousse member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Oh my gosh Pam, this is too funny!  I'm glad you were able to have a good attitude about it.  Agreed- Seagrams is not a "starter" alcohol by any means :) 
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  • morainemommorainemom member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Oh, well now that makes sense!  I was expecting Seagram's ginger ale!My throat burned for a couple of hours! And I took the Pastor's wife along with me on my road to hell! ROTFL!  She was really a good sport about the whole thing.The server kept apologizing and said, "Well, you are in Church, so it's ok."My Pastor said, "We could have a altar call -- but the beer tanks are up there and I think that would only make matters worse for you!"
  • elishanbelishanb member
    1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    That is really a great story. So funny. I have to agree though that any kind of whiskey is not the best alcohol to take any sort of sip on as your first and only taste! Glad you could laugh it off :)
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  • edited December 2011
    Too funny!  This story made me laugh:-)  My mom is the SAME way about alcohol, so I get it.  But what a memorable story you have of your daughter's RD!
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  • edited December 2011
    What a cute story Pam! It kinda stinks though you made it all these years without tasting alcohol and then that happened haha Impressive record though! You'll remember it always I'm sure!
  • edited December 2011
    Pam, this story made me LOL!  I'm sorry that it happened byt thanks for sharing with us!  The BMs reaction to you being a drunk was hilarious! 
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