Save the Dates Question

Stacey42901

OK, when you send out STD's do you send them to everyone you are inviting to the wedding?, just people you def want to make sure have the date put aside (i know that sounds rude, dont mean it to be!) I am just wondering becuz what if your guest list isnt 100% finalized?? We want an adult only reception and are trying to decide the cutoff age becuz alot of his cousins are like 13-21 and we are trying to figure out how we are gonna do this !    Thanks in advance for input!

LeiselEB

We only sent Save the Dates to our "must haves". It's not rude at all to do that - actually, I think it's smarter to do it that way because anyone who receives a STD MUST receive a wedding invitation, and if your guest list isn't finalized that could get tricky. 

As far as an age cutoff, I personally think picking a random age is not the best way to do it. If you have a family with one 22 year old you want to invite, but they also have a 15 year old, that would probably offend the family to only have some kids invited and not others. 

Try inviting in "circles" - only aunts and uncles and no cousins, or only out to first cousins, etc. 

Or just invite who you want no matter their relation - keep your family dynamics in mind, because everyone's are different. There's no cut and dry way to trim the list

Stacey42901

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_save-the-dates-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:c1bf3e5d-658f-41e8-8f9b-4a88c6c30db4Post:6565ec00-78e9-4a28-9b49-ff3bec6fd7f2">Re: Save the Dates Question</a>:
[QUOTE]We only sent Save the Dates to our "must haves". It's not rude at all to do that - actually, I think it's smarter to do it that way because anyone who receives a STD MUST receive a wedding invitation, and if your guest list isn't finalized that could get tricky.  As far as an age cutoff, I personally think picking a random age is not the best way to do it. If you have a family with one 22 year old you want to invite, but they also have a 15 year old, that would probably offend the family to only have some kids invited and not others.  Try inviting in "circles" - only aunts and uncles and no cousins, or only out to first cousins, etc.  Or just invite who you want no matter their relation - keep your family dynamics in mind, because everyone's are different. There's no cut and dry way to trim the list :)
Posted by LeiselEB[/QUOTE]


Ok thats kinda what I was thinking about sending to must haves for now! :-)
And Yes, we have a family who has a 9yo, 13yo and a 18yo...so we were like ummmm now what?? The problem is his cousins ages are like that, mine are all older so theres no issue. But theres no way we can just cut out 1st cousins either. Hmm, maybe we will just have to do 1st cousins and cut out the 2nd cousins......decisions, decisions!