Wedding Invitations & Paper

children 18+ who live with parents --separate invite?

Full of questions tonight:

I know to iclude the names of invited children of invited guests, but do they need their own invite if they are 18+ and live at home with their parents?  It is a casual rustic wedding.  TIA

Re: children 18+ who live with parents --separate invite?

  • I think they should get their own invite.
  • I agree with PPs
  • Why should they get separate invites? One invite per household is enough. The 18 yrs old can't read it on the frig like the 10 yrs old? I am only sending one per household.
  • Each adult (and 18 is an adult) should get their own invite.

    I sent FIVE, yep FIVE to one address.   My GMIL, MIL, 2 SILs and BIL all lived under one roof.  The youngest of the group was 22.     They all had dates so you can't really put 10 names on one envelope either.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited March 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_children-18-who-live-with-parents-separate-invite?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:c67893e4-d344-4dbc-ad69-db5727986098Post:76b129c4-29f7-41b8-8524-d30ce1b7e718">Re: children 18+ who live with parents --separate invite?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Why should they get separate invites? One invite per household is enough. The 18 yrs old can't read it on the frig like the 10 yrs old? I am only sending one per household.
    Posted by RNMOMTO3[/QUOTE]

    You can do this but it's completely wrong.

    Those 18 and over get their own invitation.  Invitations aren't to households - they're to social units.

    If you opt to do otherwise, know that what your'e doing is completely inappropriate.
  • PeavyPeavy member
    1000 Comments 5 Love Its
    Although proper etiquette says that those over 18 should receive their own invitations, I personally think it's pretty silly to send a separate invitation to someone in the 18-21 year range.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_children-18-who-live-with-parents-separate-invite?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:c67893e4-d344-4dbc-ad69-db5727986098Post:b3610a82-c9a1-4e73-8701-b808474b9d89">Re: children 18+ who live with parents --separate invite?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Although proper etiquette says that those over 18 should receive their own invitations, I personally think it's pretty silly to send a separate invitation to someone in the 18-21 year range.
    Posted by Peavy[/QUOTE]

    Be careful with that.  That's often the range when the "children" aren't in the house and awake for the same hours as their parents.  They often lead separate lives and interact only once every few days.  When I was that age, I was either away at college or working around the clock and out with my friends.  If my parents received an invitation and I was included on it, there would be a good chance that I wouldn't have a clue about it.

    However if I had my own mail, I'd be able to respond appropriately.

    This is not the place to cut costs.
  • I know etiquette says children 18+ should get their own invitations, but honestly, we won't be doing that and I don't GAF what etiquette says on the matter. If I still lived with my parents, I wouldn't be offended to be invited with them. We're all part of the same nuclear family, and thus I would consider us part of the same social unit. 
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_children-18-who-live-with-parents-separate-invite?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:c67893e4-d344-4dbc-ad69-db5727986098Post:0fdcad08-45f5-4233-ac87-b38a5a0dfa36">Re: children 18+ who live with parents --separate invite?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I know etiquette says children 18+ should get their own invitations, but honestly, we won't be doing that and I don't GAF what etiquette says on the matter. If I still lived with my parents, I wouldn't be offended to be invited with them. We're all part of the same nuclear family, and thus I would consider us part of the same social unit. 
    Posted by Beads921[/QUOTE]

    Etiquette isn't about how YOU would feel.  It's about treating others appropriately.

    Social units are adults.  You can be in the nuclear family but you can't be in the same social unit as your parents. 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_children-18-who-live-with-parents-separate-invite?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:c67893e4-d344-4dbc-ad69-db5727986098Post:0fdcad08-45f5-4233-ac87-b38a5a0dfa36">Re: children 18+ who live with parents --separate invite?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I know etiquette says children 18+ should get their own invitations, but honestly, we won't be doing that and I don't GAF what etiquette says on the matter. If I still lived with my parents, I wouldn't be offended to be invited with them. We're all part of the same nuclear family, and thus I would consider us part of the same social unit. 
    Posted by Beads921[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>I sent 5 invitations to 1 address.  Yes 5.  My GMIL, 2 SIL, BIL all lived with my MIL.  The youngest of the group was 22.   All but GMIL had SO.   So you really think it would have been appropriate to send 1 invite to the household?</div><div>
    </div><div>
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    </div></div>






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • Im going to have to agree to disagree on this one. I think its a waste of money to mail more than one invite per household unless its 2 completely separate families sharing a living space. As far as not cutting corners on separate invites for each person, I would rather get a little better food at a wedding that get a separate invite I could have shared  with my housemates. Cant eat an invitation!
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