Jen (New To) I read your post the other day and it had me laughing hysterically. Your MIL got $1. Have you warned her "not to spend it all in one place!" I'd ask her what her big plans are for the money! :)Anyway, I wanted to share my FIL drama with all of you. I posted it on the Nest, but realized I didn't tell you ladies. I may DD because who knows who is out there lurking.DH received an email from his mom talking about how FIL wants to come and visit soon. FIL would be coming alone (MIL and FIL don't get along but are still married). My DH talked to me about it; we felt that FIL wanted to come for Thanksgiving. We are spending two weeks with our families at Christmastime and decided that Thanksgiving would be "our" holiday and Christmas would be spent with the families. When the three of us spent Thanksgiving together 2 years ago, it was generally uncomfortable, awkward, we don't get along, etc. So DH and I decided that any time this month was good other than Thanksgiving. DH's dad said he wants to come see us from Nov. 20th through December 4th. He will be staying in a hotel. My DH cannot take vacation days and has to work a lot. He said this and told his dad to pick a different time because we are very busy over Thanksgiving and wouldn't be able to host him.DH's dad just kept saying that he is getting a good deal over these two weeks on flights. I think it is pretty rude to book flights without discussing the days with your host. My DH told him that Thanksgiving is just going to be the two of us (me and him). He said "Fine, I'll just go to the beach." Every time DH told him that these two weeks are not good for us, he repeated that he would amuse himself, go to the beach, etc.I feel incredibly rude knowing that a family member is in town and not inviting him or her for a holiday meal. However, FIL has done this in the past. I do not want to continue letting him think he can just come here anytime he wants. On the other hand, we can't tell him he can't visit this state/area and stay in a hotel.Our plan now is to see him once or twice for dinner over the two weeks. There is actually a chance I may be working promotions on Thanksgiving, so if I can, I will do that (with DH's blessing, since I feel like FIL alreadymessed up my plans, I might as well make money). I realize that I should be a nicer person and cherish the time we do have with family. However, I do not get along with this man at all (he is racist, makes sexual comments about me, treated his wife and kids badly). I am cordial and don't mind a visit with him, but want it to be on our terms. My DH and I are on the same page.WDYT of all of this? Am I wrong? What is your advice?