venting!

toothpastechica

So, i was at FI's parents house for dinner today, and as much as i think his parents are great people...i think between his mom being a social person and his being an only child she want this wedding to be everything she wants. Its just starting to annoy me, and i know what she says is all only suggestions....and FI keeps reminding me that...its hard to want to talk about the wedding with her, and thats all she seems to want to talk about! She mentioned what kind of food SHE wants at the wedding and how there should be a buffet and stuff...and well...my parents are paying for the catering and my parents dont have a lot of money, so ive told my mom what we for sure dont want, what the special food needs of certain people who are coming are and told her from there that whatever she finds that they can afford would be great. So for MIL to be saying all this stuff about what she wants kinda really annoys me....NEWSFLASH its our wedding not yours!!!! And as much as we would love to invite all your friends....well we have already cut out all our friends we dont really wanna go over budget to invite people we dont care about. We have included everyone on her "must be there list" but cut most of the people on her "it would be nice" list...which even that annoys me since ive cut people who are on my MUST BE THERE LIST...to make room for more of his parents friends. And apparently shes talking to florest without me, about what would look nice, and im like....uhhh hello......my wedding remember?

 Sorry for the rant i just needed to vent somewhere. I think the thing that annoys me the most is that i feel like i have to be quiet because they are paying for most of the wedding since fi and i dont have a lot of  money right now any my parents are in a hard time financially....but its just getting to the point where i dont want to make my parents feel like what they are doing isnt enough because of what his mom wants...because i know that they are doing thier best.

mandi921vh

I am a little confused... at the beginning you mentioned that your parents are paying for food, then towards the end of your post you mentioned that you have to be quiet because they are paying for most of the wedding.

Whoever is paying for something say food, music or flowers gets a say on where their money is going. If your FMIL is not paying for any aspect of the wedding or is telling you her ideas for things she is not paying for then just say, "that is an idea, I will think about it", then change the subject, and limit the wedding talk with her. 

toothpastechica

my parents are paying for food..his parents have more money then my parents and shes going on and on about what SHE wants on the menu.....its the only big thing my parents are paying for, and i feel like shes trying to force them to spend more money becaue they are willing to give us more then my parents can afford