May 2012 Weddings
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Why didn't I think of this before?

Hi ladies,

FI and I were over at my mom's this weekend and the subject who would be in the room where we are getting ready, came up.  The girls and I are getting our hair done in the morning, then heading over to the venue.  The venue is someones property and the whole upstairs is a bridal suite where the girls can get ready.  My father is unable to attend the wedding, so my mom will be bringing her close friend.  I want my mom to be there, but what about her friend? Her friend isn't going to know anyone, because the wedding is out of state..is it rude just to have my mom there or should I invite the friend? Also, our flower girl..she is my niece..if she gets ready with us, I assume her mom will be helping her get ready..so that's more people.  FI mentioned that his mom would probably like to be there too, which I am not a big fan of.  I'm not sure why I never thought about who would be around me right before the wedding, but I'm having a bit of anxiety about it.  Who are you having with you before the wedding?


TIA!

Re: Why didn't I think of this before?

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    We don't have a flower girl, so most likely just my mom and BMs.  FI's mom is getting her hair done with us, but I'm not sure if she's getting ready with us.  I'm okay with either option, but we also get along really well.  I suppose the only other person will be our photographer, but she won't get there until right before I get dressed. :)
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    I am hoping my family will be the only ones there (my sisters, my aunt, my mother) and that his family will be with him. 

    I don't think I would be able to relax if everyone wanted to be around.


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    That sounds like a lot of people in one room! I think I would be too anxious for all those people. I hadn't thought about this either. I guess I am assuming that my MOH, mom, and FMIL would get ready in their own rooms and then come to mine to help me. I haven't figured out hair and make up yet, since it's costly to have them come to the hotel. I don't want anymore than that. My FMIL barely speaks English, so my anxiety will go through the roof as it is. I want to keep the amount of people around minimal.
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    mandi921vhmandi921vh member
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    edited February 2012
    I understand not wanting a lot of people in the room while you are getting ready. I think it will just be me, my mom, my sister (BM) and MOH, at my parents' house getting ready before the ceremony. I have two other local BMs that would be invited to get ready with us, but I am not sure if they will. There is also FSIL who is staying at a hotel the night before, I am not sure if she will be getting ready with us, but she is invited.  All of the BMs will be going in the limo to the ceremony together so they would eventually need to make it to my parents'.

    Personally I don't want my FMIL in the room. Not because I don't like her, it just isn't something I want her to be a part of. It's more of my mom and my BMs thing.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_why-didnt-i-think-of-this-before?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:867791e1-97c4-4ae6-aab1-34f5475c07d4Post:46b2fcf1-20d2-4f50-8e06-741010d2bbc7">Re: Why didn't I think of this before?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I understand not wanting a lot of people in the room while you are getting ready. I think it will just be me, my mom, my sister (BM) and MOH, at my parents' house getting ready before the ceremony. I have two other local BMs that would be invited to get ready with us, but I am not sure if they will. There is also FSIL who is staying at a hotel the night before, I am not sure if she will be getting ready with us, but she is invited.  All of the BMs will be going in the limo to the ceremony together so they would eventually need to make it to my parents'. <strong>Personally I don't want my FMIL in the room. Not because I don't like her, it just isn't something I want her to be a part of. It's more of my mom and my BMs thing.</strong>
    Posted by mandi921vh[/QUOTE]

    This!
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    I think it'll be me, MOH, my FSIL (also my only BM), mom, FMIL, maybe her mother, and our hair stylist. And I imagine the photographer will be in and out.

    Somehow in my head I thought it would be more people, but I guess not :)
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    Orginally I was staying at my aunts house the night before, but because of unforseen circumstances I cant stay there any more and me and my MOH are staying in one place while my other bm's are staying somewhere else...Everyone will get dressed (except for me) before they come and then will come up to do makeup and hair and stuff. So now that its not at a reletives place it will just me me, my moh/2 bridesmaids, one of the photograpehrs and possibly my mom, and thats it getting ready...then my jrbridesmaid and flower girl are going to come about half a hour  to an hour before the ceremony to get in some of the pictures with us. I am kind of relieved its going to be a few less people I was picturing utter chaos when it was at my aunts since i have 4 aunts who all live on one property!

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    My "getting ready people" >>> Me, MOB, BMs, Photog + FOB (most likely)
    My flowergirls are getting ready and then meeting us at the ceremony site AFTER prewedding photos and the MOG simply was only invited to the boys getting ready...we don't really get along.

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    I guess I hadn't thought of that either. We're all staying at the hotel the night before so I guess everyone will get ready in their room. Otherwise it would be me, my Mom, MOH and 4 BMs and that's just too many people! 
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    At the hotel, it'll just be the bridal party, my mom, cousin, photographer, and videographer (for part of it). The room just isn't that big lol. When we go to the church though, I'll invite the FGs and their mothers in with us.
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    I think you should def invite your mom's friend to tag along, otherwise how will she occupy her time? FI's mom? Not if it'll make you uncomfortable. Just say you don't want a lot of ppl there, anxiety and all.

    I'll have my mom, one of my older sisters, and one of my younger sisters. I don't have a bridal party, but I think I'll invite one or two friends to join us to get ready, or meet us at the hotel early.
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    Me, my BMs, my mom, & my FMIL will be in the room while we're getting ready. My mom & FMIL are getting their hair/makeup done with us, & they both know they're more than welcome to stay & get ready with us too! I get along very well with my FMIL so it's not a big deal to me, at all.

    As far as your situation goes, I would invite your mom's friend & your flower girl's mom. Overall, I don't think you'll really notice them being there & they probably will stay out of your way. Just have fun with your BMs & don't let them stress you out :) I would also allow your FMIL to be there since your mom is going to be there, that way no feelings are hurt. GL!
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    My FI wants us all to get ready at his parent's house, but that could end up being a lot of people. So it hasn't really been decided yet.

    At minimum, my mom and my two sisters and my aunt. 

    At the other end of the spectrum, a houseful of his aunts and uncles, his parents, my parents, his sister and some of our friends. A pre ceremony party, essentially. (His parents love to entertain and have the house for it, so it is actually possible that most of the wedding could get ready there while his mom and aunts feed everyone.) 


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