May 2012 Weddings

**Warning** Long little Rant

Okay a little history of the past two weeks (long)  

Last Saturday FI and I were visiting my parents at the winery, a little bit later my sister shows up and pretty much takes over the conversation to talk about her non-stop.  I’m pretty use to it so FI and I pretty much ignored her and still had a good time.  While I’m sitting 5 feet away from her she leans over and tells my stepmom that I’m totally acting like a bi*ch to her.  This so pissed me off but I kept my cool, got up from my seat and announced that it was time for us to leave.  Keep in mind that my stepmom was waiting on customers when she said this. 


After I got up and headed for the door everyone starts flipping out
Stepmom- This is ridiculous
Sister- Why is Lissa so mean to me
FI- I have no clue what just happened
Me- Bye 

A little bit later I called my dad since he wasn't in the tasting room at the time to tell him I had left and sorry for not saying bye. He starts telling me that I don't need to come over there starting a bunch of sh*t in front of customers.  I hit the ceiling
right about then.  1st off, someone had to have said that I started something for him to say this and 2nd I didn't say or do anything, I left before I said what I really wanted to.


So that is what led to the falling out with my parents.  After I wrote them a nice long letter explaining what happened and things from my end as well as how they had hurt my feelings by blaming me for something that I definitely didn’t do they called and apologized. 
 Well after that weekend FI and I decided to just do away with all of the original planning and go away to be married.  I let my parents know this last weekend and they flipped once again.  My stepmom (who raised me) told me that I’m depriving her of having a wedding for at least one of her girls (sister went to the courthouse a few months ago and let everyone know she was married a week later). My dad wasn’t too happy with our plans either.  Honestly I thought they could care less since they had no interest what so ever in any of the planning.  

Now my problem is whether or not to invite them to Barbados.  I don’t even know if they would come but I don’t feel that I should deprive them of the opportunity.  FI on the other hand is livid about the whole situation and doesn’t want to invite them.  I stuck between a rock and a hard place on this one. 
Thanks for listening

 

Re: **Warning** Long little Rant

  • wow! That totally sucks. :( I say just wait it out a few days before making a definite decision. That usually works for me, because if I don't, I will act out of anger/emotions. And that usually makes things worse for this emotional girl! Haha. Good luck!
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  • Mona8Mona8 member
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_warning-long-little-rant?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:f70c233b-2ece-4f87-93d6-614800cf22d6Post:66669cf4-32c3-4c6f-916f-0a36fb192e51">Re: **Warning** Long little Rant</a>:
    [QUOTE]wow! That totally sucks. :( I say just wait it out a few days before making a definite decision. That usually works for me, because if I don't, I will act out of anger/emotions. And that usually makes things worse for this emotional girl! Haha. Good luck!
    Posted by kedorsett[/QUOTE]

    ^^This^^
    Take a few days so both you and FI can calm down a bit, and then talk about what would make the two of you happy? Would you regret not having your parents there, or do you think it'd be less stresssful and better if they didn't go? This is just an awful situation that I wish you didn't have to deal with! But maybe after a few days, your parents will see things a bit more clearly and apologize?  ::fingers crossed::
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  • Thanks Ladies.  Love yall.  I've let it cool for almost two weeks now.  A week since I told the parents about the DW.  FI is just very protective when it comes to my feelings and doesn't like seeing me upset.  I'm hoping that once he cools down he wouldn't mind asking them.  But like I said I don't even know if they would come.

     

  • edited April 2011
    Awwww.... I am sorry Lissa.... I agree with PP let it die down some then revisit this conversation. Since we are doing a DW I will tell you how FI and I came about our decision with not inviting anyone.... My family would go if I got married in Nashville or if I went to Canada. FI family on the other wouldn't be able to go for financial reasons and some just dont like to fly. DW are not supposed to be stressful (but they actually are lol)... Dont worry in the end it will all work out...... *Hugs* Dont worry be Happy!!! It's Friday!!!!Tongue out
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  • I agree with all the PPs. Its crazy how the most exciting time of your life and people around you are so negative. You don't need the extra unnecessary stress.
    I hope things work out! *BIG HUGS*
  • Sorry Lissa girl! I'm with the PP and Ambie too as it makes it hard to invite one set and not the other, ours both happened to agree the same, but we were very selective with who we invited. I'd say to let things cool down a bit because in a heated situation no one can think rationally or clearly. Then weigh the pros and cons of asking or not asking. Odds are you should ask as they're your parents, but it is your wedding...xo
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  • Thanks Girls.  Yep I think I'll give it another couple of weeks before bringing this topic up again to FI. 

     

  • Ugh that is so frustrating! Nothing pisses me off more than when I am accused of being a bitch or in a sour mood when I am not.

    I think that you should just wait this out for a few days before making any huge decisions. 
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  • You need to invite them. They can say, "no" but the FI shouldn't be making that call, you should (though I'm sure he's just trying to protect your from the pain of them possibly blowing up about it)
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