Family budget weirdness

liticaphobia

So my mom and stepdad offered to contribute 2000 $ to my wedding, I really don't mean to sound spoiled so hear me out first. My mother and I made plans to go to a fabric shop to pick out some stuff for table cloths and she cancelled on me then told me that before we go and get anything we have to make a list and have my step dad approve it before we buy anything..it makes me a little uncomfortable because its my wedding and I would kinda like to be in charge of it and it just seems very controlling to me. I'm not a bridezilla by any means and just need some opinions if this is normal. I know when my dad paid for my sisters wedding he just wrote them a check and trusted they would know what to do. Please no hateful remarks please

amc331

While I understand that your step father would probably just like to see where the money is going, I think I would feel the same way as you. If the $2000 was considered a gift to you and your hubby-to-/be to help with wedding costs, you should be able to use the money however you wish, as long as it pertains to the wedding. However, I am just on the outside looking in, so my opinion may not mean much of anything. I probably didn't give you the answer you were looking for, but I hope that helps!

VarunaTT

I think I would see if they'd like the $2K to go towards something specific like photography or flowers?  Or if there's something they don't want to pay for like alcohol?  

They're attaching strings, so it's best to just find out what they are and budget accordingly.

DG1

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_family-budget-weirdness?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:1296ab5d-b226-4ffb-b844-2e1fba656f97Post:a24dc485-e514-4b5c-bd43-4aafcf002c2f">Re: Family budget weirdness</a>:
[QUOTE]I think I would see if they'd like the $2K to go towards something specific like photography or flowers?  Or if there's something they don't want to pay for like alcohol?   They're attaching strings, so it's best to just find out what they are and budget accordingly.
Posted by VarunaTT[/QUOTE]

<div>This. It sounds like they aren't just giving you money.</div>

TheMrsC23

Is there any way that you could have him pay the vendor of your choice directly?  Like the bakery or photog or dress shop?  That way he knows exactly where his money is going.

If that's not possible, then just make a list of expenses and give it to him.

If you're not comfortable with that (which is honestly confounding me), then say "thanks, but no thanks," and move on.