PLEASE PLEASE HELP!!!!!

Duffy27

I am between a rock and an even harder place. It is about three months before my wedding and my fiancé and his family want to change our wedding venue, which unfortunately means changing our wedding date. This means all the invites need to be redone, I need a new DJ, redoing our entire website and schedule ect. In my mind it’s an obvious Heck No but I am totally outnumbered by both sets of his parents (who are paying for most of the food). It's causing a lot of drama and my parents are telling me to just call off the wedding or at least postpone it another year and I want neither of those!! I am beyond stressed because I feel like all the hard work I have put in is being flushed down the toilet. Don't get me wrong the new place is gorgeous and has all the bells and whistles for just about the same price but it really doesn't fit in with my vision or stress tolerance. Please Help!! How do I stand up to both his parents and mine, or should I just give in??

soontobehanby

I answered on the Etiquette board. If you are posting on more the one board put a XP in the title.

thejucheidea

If you're wanting to adhere to 100% your 'vision', you might want to pay for the wedding yourself. If you're not paying, you don't have full say in what happens.

kmmssg

I answered you on the Etiquette board.  Like I said there, it seems you planned the wedding you wanted and your FI wants what his parents are suggesting.  Compromise.

Lyds85

I think you need to sit down and seriously talk to them. Try to understand where they are coming from but also get them to understand where you are coming from. Find some middle ground. I know this is stressful, but try to get through this as calmly as possible because stress will make it worse. best of luck to you hun.

stampadhesive

I say if you've already ordered invitations, it is too late to change the location or date.

amorrison340

I agree that it is your wedding, and at this point it sounds like it is unneccessary stress.  It is really nice that they are paying for most of the food.  But, are they also planning on paying the differences on your lost deposits for the DJ, venue and anything else?  Will they be the ones paying for the reprinting of the invitations?  Is there a particular reason they want to change the venue at this point, other than they just like it? 

I would take a long bubble bath, breath deeply and then talk to your fiance and then his parents.  Opening the lines of communication might be a good start so you can address these things calmly and openly from both sides.  Honestly, I would most likely say no, and explain all the time and effort that went into my choices and difficultly in changing so close to the date. Also, if they aren't willing to pay for all the changes, they may change their minds or if you do say no, it won't really be justified for them to get upset.  You might even want to prepare what it would end up costing to change at this point, sometimes figures speak to people better than words.

Hope that helps, and good luck!