Wedding Etiquette Forum
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Face palm...

So my fianc and I are home drinking wine watching a documentary on Elton John and start talking about the wedding. I asked him if he's asked his last groomsman yet and he says "no, I'm not going to because it will make the bridal party uneven."

Soooo.... Of course I tell him he's ridiculous and if he wants him to stand up he should ask him. Uneven sides is no big deal. And basically tell him everything we say on here. But he isn't having it. So please... Ladies respond to this so I can show my fianc I'm not nuts.

Re: Face palm...

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    Awwwww - it's nice to hear that a bride isn't pushing to make the bridal party even. I think that it's important that you invite people to be part of your bridal party if it's something that you've already envisioned, or hoped for. 
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    vsgalvsgal member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    Sides do not have to be even.  You pick your side and he picks his. 

    The people that stand next to you should be your nearest and dearest. Keeping someone out because you want even sides is like saying them "You are one of my best friends, but my FI is only having 3 in her party and I already have 3 and I like you 4th best.  You don't make the top 3 in my life."  How would you feel if someone said that to you?
    ROCK IS KING!!
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    Pick the people you want to stand by you. You want your very best and closest friends there on such a fabulous and joyful day! We had uneven sides and it didn't matter AT ALL. Each guy and gal walked down on their own, so there weren't any 'escort' issues. And I'm not sure I can even tell in the pictures unless I take the time to sit and count.

    We even shook up the norm and had girls as groomswomen. And a Best Maid (his sister). This shouldn't be about looking perfectly even in pictures or anything like that. People won't think it's weird if the sides are uneven. They might not even notice. It's important to have the people you love with you. You won't look back on your wedding and say 'man, I wish I hadn't asked so-and-so; the pictures are sooo uneven.'. You WILL look back and say 'man, I really wish I had asked my good good friend so-and-so to stand up there with me.' 
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    What does he think will happen if the sides are uneven?! Are the wedding police going to shut you down and declare the marriage invalid? And when he looks at wedding pictures, is he going to be counting heads and weighing bride:groom ratios? Or is he going to look at them and think, man, I wish I had asked my friend.
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    AddieCakeAddieCake member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited April 2013
    SJM's fiance:

    Nobody will care if your sides are uneven. Our sides were uneven, and our best man was a woman.  If you want someone standing with you on your wedding day, you ask him or her; you don't worry about even sides. The only thing anybody cares about at a wedding is the cake. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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    My sides were uneven.  I heard are wedding was deemed invaild because of it.  Wink



    Honestly, nothing you really can do if he is not willing to take your advice.  Maybe let him think about it and revisit the topic again in a few days?






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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    mlg78mlg78 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper
    Oh thank God. I thought I was the only one who had a fiancé obsessed with having even sides. I've told him time and time again it didn't matter...and wouldn't ya know, 4 months after asking our groomsmen he's regretting not asking another one because, *gasp*, that'd make for uneven sides! Oh, the HORROR!
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    In Response to Re:Face palm...:[QUOTE]Oh thank God. I thought I was the only one who had a fianceacute; obsessed with having even sides. I've told him time and time again it didn't matter...and wouldn't ya know, 4 months after asking our groomsmen he's regretting not asking another one because, gasp, that'd make for uneven sides! Oh, the HORROR! Posted by mlg78[/QUOTE]


    Lol. It's funny how clueless they are. He hasn't really been involved in much of the planning... Which I'm fine with. He works crazy hours and I have no problem handling most of the planning. But he really is clueless when it comes to certain things... Like this. And like when I told him I need him to start getting family members phone numbers. He asked why and I told him in case we have to call people after invites go out and we don't get rsvps back. He looked so confused and said "that's dumb. If they don't RSVP then they're not coming."
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    I dunno. Maybe WPs are like boats, and if one side is heavier than the other, you'll all tip over and drown at the altar. I mean, formal clothes are hard to swim in, ya know.
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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    Anniversary

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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_face-palm?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8ca60501-32a0-43b4-8c1b-b6e13eeae945Post:c0b19925-a9a5-42dc-8a7f-b897d9e9e742">Re:Face palm...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I dunno. Maybe WPs are like boats, and if one side is heavier than the other, you'll all tip over and drown at the altar. I mean, formal clothes are hard to swim in, ya know.
    Posted by Peledreamsofrain[/QUOTE]

    Lol - nice!

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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_face-palm?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8ca60501-32a0-43b4-8c1b-b6e13eeae945Post:c0b19925-a9a5-42dc-8a7f-b897d9e9e742">Re:Face palm...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I dunno. Maybe WPs are like boats, and if one side is heavier than the other, you'll all tip over and drown at the altar. I mean, formal clothes are hard to swim in, ya know.
    Posted by Peledreamsofrain[/QUOTE]

    <div>*like*</div><div>
    </div><div>In that case, I'm glad ours was even. Whew--catastrophe averted!</div>
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    Sides don't need to be even. We each started with four. Then my wife had a bridesmaid drop out due to work reasons. We didn't replace her. Then I had a bridesmaid drop out for other reasons, which made the sides even again. You just can't guarantee your numbers won't change anyways. Ask him if he is going to insist on last minute replacements if someone has to drop out of the wedding.
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