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Rehearsal dinner guest list

Hi there! I've got another question. My FI and I are trying to firm up the guest list for our rehearsal dinner, and we've reached an impasse. I know that anyone who is needed at the rehearsal is then invited to the dinner, along with their SO's and the parents and siblings of our ring bearer and flower girls. Now, I also thought that the invitation should be extended to the minister and his wife, as well as the organist/pianist and her husband, because they are needed at the rehearsal. But my FI, as well as both of our mothers who we've consulted, don't think that they need to be invited. Which of us is wrong?
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Re: Rehearsal dinner guest list

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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_rehearsal-dinner-guest-list-7?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c25f72df-2b83-4865-b0c0-b582014cdf42Post:23f2e6c5-f797-41e2-88c5-8b97b67ad3ec">Rehearsal dinner guest list</a>:
    [QUOTE]Hi there! I've got another question. My FI and I are trying to firm up the guest list for our rehearsal dinner, and we've reached an impasse. I know that anyone who is needed at the rehearsal is then invited to the dinner, along with their SO's and the parents and siblings of our ring bearer and flower girls. Now, I also thought that the invitation should be extended to the minister and his wife, as well as the organist/pianist and her husband, because they are needed at the rehearsal. But my FI, as well as both of our mothers who we've consulted, don't think that they need to be invited. Which of us is wrong?
    Posted by kamilovich[/QUOTE]
    The rehearsal dinner is for everyone that rehearses. My take on that is, that would also logically include the minister (and his wife) and the organisit/pianist (and her husband).
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    The minister and pianist are both technically getting paid, I think. Although the minister's money might go to the church. I'll have to check. But they're also members of the church I grew up in, and its more than just a vendor relationship. If it changes things. I had the same logic, Simply. But when I said that to FI and the mothers they looked at me like I had three heads. I'll have to talk to them all again.
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    I'm a wedding musician. When I'm asked to attend a rehearsal, I always appreciate an invite to the RD. If I didn't know the couple, I would probably politely decline. I think you should extend the invitation.
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    We invited our JOP to the rehearsal dinner and she came.  Little awkward since we didn't know her from Adam, but whatever.
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    The rehearsal dinner is a thank you. You thanks your vendors by paying them. I agree with the moms that they do not need to be invited, and if I'm reading right and FMIL is the hostess, I think you should defer to her on this.
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    Anyone needed at the rehearsal, along with immediate family, should be invited.  Out-of-town guests are optional.
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