Wedding Etiquette Forum
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Thank you notes

I just attended my cousin's wedding. I flew halfway accross the US to get there, bought her a really nice present, and had to take a day off of work to do so. Is it weird that my mother is insisting that I need to write a thank you note to the bride's PARENTS for inviting me to the wedding? Also, I know the bride pretty much planned the whole thing.

Re: Thank you notes

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    Yes that's weird. Ignore her.
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    That's weird. Just don't do it.
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    Very weird and totally unnecessary.
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    Ditto. Not at all necessary. Odd. 
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    Ignore that advice! They should be sending you a thank you note next day air! It's always a lot for people to come to other's weddings out of state (or destination) as well as give a generous gift! I would be calling them poking for a thank you within 2 months! Seriously!
    Loving every planning moment!
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    Thanks for all the replies! I thought it was weird, but I wanted to make sure I was in the right, etiquettewise, before I ignored my mother.
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    hoffsehoffse member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper
    I actually don't think it's that weird.  We had many guests write my parents thank yous.  The hostess for my bridesmaid brunch also got thank you notes, as did the hostesses for my shower.  It's something that people do in my circle.

    A nice compromise might be to send a quick email to the bride's parents telling them that you enjoyed the event and thought it was lovely, blah blah blah.  
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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    I'd call or e-mail the bride and say you had a good time and thank her for inviting you. You could send a card, but I think it would really be most natural to just communicate with her the way you usually communicate, whether it's phone, e-mail, or text. If her mom hosted the event, you can do the same thing with her. It's not necessary, but when I received texts and e-mails from people saying they enjoyed my shower, it just warmed my heart. I am always on board with things that make people feel good. You can then tell your mom that yes, you communicated your appreciation to the bride and mom and then change the subject.
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