Did I wait too long...? 3 Bridesmaids' Dress Questions

sarahdactyI

Our wedding is November 9th of this year. I have been postponing picking a bridesmaid dress (Or designer/fabric/etc.) because I really wanted to be able to go with my girls (or at least my MOH) and look together (I live away from the rest of them). Unfortunately, that just is not going to happen. 

No worries! I've made my peace with not having that sort of experience. My problem is that last week when I was in town and had my gown fitted, my mom and I poked into the bridal section to take a look at colors. While we were in there, the bridesmaid consultant basically told me that we need to order our dresses ASAP (5 months before the wedding). For some reason I had been thinking 4 month - but she said you need to give the girls another month for alterations. 

Now I'm really worried and all of my bridesmaids are quite busy this June, so I feel terrible calling them and saying "I know I told you that we had until July, but I need you to go and get measured/try on dresses RIGHT NOW kthxbye." 

My questions...

1. The bridal salon won't give any promises (at all) about when the dresses will get here/what the latest date is we can order. Is that normal? Or should I find another salon? (They will give us 15% off since it is where I got my dress. My mother is paying for all the girls' dresses and is not too concerned with costs, but 15% off 5 dresses would be fantastic.)

2. Is it OK to just ask the girls to get measured and not to try the samples on? I have only been a bridesmaid once, and we did not have any involvement in the dress selection nor did we get to try them on before we paid for them. I really wanted to give my bridesmaids a different (better!) experience and I just feel really stupid for waiting so long... especially since I've taken care of so many other things, all relating to ME. 

And tangentially related:

3. One of my bridesmaids is currently international. How does that work?! Should I have my mom ship the dress to her when it arrives, so she can try it on and get it fitted? I think her plan is to fly in just for the wedding weekend, so no time to get alterations before, unless the bridal shop is super-conservative on their times and the dresses come in 1-2 months in advance of what they say.

FWIW we are looking at Bill Levkoff.

Thank you! 

calliopeia2013

1. Find another salon!!!!!!  This is a thing that some salons do; it's not abnormal, exactly- but one of my BMs ordered from a salon with that policy, and it was a nightmare.  An absolute nightmare.  Rush alterations at the last minute, me fighting with the salon manager over the phone two days before the wedding, the works.  And she ordered much earlier than your girls would be.  Not.  Worth.  It.

2. Depends on your BMs.  I am unusually shaped and many standard bridesmaids dresses will not fit me at all.  Like, it's not that they won't fit me off the rack, it's that even with alterations, they wouldn't fit me.  (My bust to waist ratio is pretty unusual; effectively I would have to buy about a size 12-14 in many BM dresses to fit my bust while I wear a 4 or a 6 in the waist/hips- many dresses can't be taken in that much at the waist and still maintain their structure.)  No matter how much I loved a friend, I would not buy a bridesmaid's dress before trying it on.  I mean, it wouldn't be fair to me OR to the bride if I ordered a dress that I then couldn't wear.  If all of your BMs have very standard body types and can wear almost anything off the rack, though, you might be absolutely fine just ordering them.  I'd recommend talking to your BMs about this- most people know that I'm busty, obviously, but not everyone knows quite how dramatic it is, because I usually dress in such a way as to not draw too much attention to it.  So they may have fit issues you're not totally aware of.

3. Can she order it in the country she's living in?  Some lines may be available internationally.  It certainly sounds like she'll have to get her alterations done there, either way.

 

 

 

chaiteachick

Ugh. This is exactly why I'm having my girls' dresses handmade by someone I KNOW I can rely on. Ridiculous... we don't have time for this sort of shenanegans; you think a BRIDAL SALON would be able to figure that out! 

Best of luck to you... is there any way you could get the dresses made by a local seamstress? That way, the dresses could be done to exact measurements, with little or no need of alterations before the big day. 

sarahdactyI

Thanks for all the input! I feel better already. My MOH tried on a few dresses at David's Bridal and sent me pictures so at least I know that (color and fabric wise) we always have that option. I'll have to research international dress companies!

ETA - Unfortunately we do not have a local seamstress. That is the kind of thing that I would think comes in VERY handy!!