Bridesmaids Dress Color??

mallorylee0790

Hey all,

Ok, so here's my dilemma....my parents won't let me get married next March because my little brother is graduating high school next May and they don't want me to steal his thunder so to say. However, they will let me get married in October or November instead. But the colors I want for my bridesmaids look a little springy (and yes I'm dead set on the colors because it's the ONLY thing I can choose...my parents are paying for it therefore they picked out the Church and reception hall). Here's the link to color blue I would like. Is it too "springy" to use in an October wedding?

http://www.davidsbridal.com/Browse_Bridal-Party-Bridesmaids-Shop-By-Color?colorName=Malibu

Teddy917

1. Decline their money and do what you want.
2. Do whatever colors you like, no matter what season.

mallorylee0790

Lol, my fiance were just talking about that, but then my mom would get pissed cause I'm an ungrateful spoiled bitch who didn't want their money and the nice things she wanted for me yadda-yadda-yadda. And I can't do that cause my mom's got this fashion thing and certain colors can only be used in certain seasons. She's very uppity and I'm the complete opposite. 

allispain

Let your mom get pissed. If you're getting married you're old enough to make your own decisions and not do everything your parents want you to do. If you let her dictate your entire wedding, she's going to keep trying to dictate your entire life - where you live, how many kids you have, what you name your kids, etc. Granted, if you're okay with that, then hey, whatever floats your boat. Me? I'd be running as fast as humanly possible in the opposite direction.

mallorylee0790

True, but I still live at home with my parents and we don't have our own house yet and moving in with his parents would just make the situation worse cause my mom thinks I like his mom better (which I do cause we get along and we have the same personality), so it'd be VERY uncomfortable in my household and it's already awful enough. I keep playing with the idea of eloping lol and taking the money so we can get a house and I can get the hell away from her cause she has anxiety and depression and takes it out on my dad, brother and I all the time and it's a horrible feeling not wanting to go home cause you never know what's waiting for you when you walk through the door with her. That's why my brother is always at friends' houses and my dad's always gone on the weekends for work. 

Maggie0829

Your Mom is the one acting like a bitch.  I really don't understand how you getting married in March takes away from your brother who is graduating 2 months later.

Honestly, I really think you should turn down her money and pay for it yourself because it doesn't sound like you are going to get any input into your own wedding.  Is that what you really want?  You don't want to look back on your wedding 10 or 20 years down the road and hate everything about it and resent your Mother forever because she is so utterly controlling.

What is your Mom going to say if you decide to have kids?  That you can't get pregnant during April because it will over shadow her birthday?  Seriously that is the way you are headed.

mallorylee0790

Because everyone's still gonna be talking about my wedding and they "can't afford" for me to get married and send him off to college (which is TOTAL bs cause my dad makes a crap ton and she doesn't have to work, not to mention we both went to private schools). And I don't understand if he leaves in August and I get married in October it's the same difference between March and May. 

She says that when I look back in 25 years IF my fiance and I are still married, that where it was and all that won't matter cause what we'll remember are the people who we shared that day with, not the details of it. Which I agree to a certain point, I will remember details about where it was and all that too. And what's funny is she always says she doesn't want me to resent her for anything later on in life, well she's headed down that path but she doesn't want to hear it...that's when she pulls the ungrateful bitch card out at me.

So far the only thing she says about us having kids is that they're going to live miserable lives because we both like to do fitness competitions and don't really eat junk food, but I am going allow my kids to be kids and if that means letting them eat cake and candy and cookies and ice cream and pizza, they're going to have it. That's the fun of being a kid! 

Maggie0829

Your mother sounds awful.  First no mother should call their daughter an "ungrateful bitch", second she is already telling you that your marriage isn't going to last and third, what a horrible thing to say to you about any future children.  She is basically saying that your marriage is going to fail and you will be horrible parents.

Please, do not take her money.  Your mother needs to learn boundaries and respect.  You taking their money will just let her continue her awful behavior and leave you feeling like you have no control over your own life.

mallorylee0790

RetreadBride: You have my mom and brother down to a pinpoint lol. Everything is always "poor him" cause I'm the oldest and he always gets the short end of the stick, but he's allowed to do a lot of what I was never allowed to do, not to mention he's mommy's little boy. And I know that it doesn't matter what colors are in what season, but she always has to impress someone and wants to show what an amazing wedding they could throw for their little girl. It's all a show to impress people...who, well you got me there. 

The more my fiance and I talk the more I'm just ready to elope and start our lives together, because in the end that's all that really matters.

MairePoppy

mallorylee0790 said:

I keep playing with the idea of eloping lol and taking the money so we can get a house and I can get the hell away from her 

Have your parents offered you a choice between a wedding and the money they would have spent on your wedding? That sounds like a generous offer, to me. 

I'm the mother of three adults. In your mom's defense, that last half of senior year, college tuition payments, books and all the stuff students need to move away from home and into a dorm, can be expensive. Your father may make a 'crap ton of money' but you don't know what your parents expenses are, unless you're their accountant. Plus, they've sent both of you to private school, another expense.Are they still supporting you? Did they pay for your schooling? They very well could need some breathing room between your brother's graduation and your wedding.

That said, if you're not happy with what your parents are offering, turn down their money. Elope, if that's what you want to do. Tell your parents, you did it because you didn't want to wait until October to get married. They'll be pissed, but they'll get over it. Just make sure that you and your new husband are able to afford a place of your own, before you do it. It would be really difficult to go home after that.

Now to your question: you don't have to use seasonal colors for your wedding. Your bms can wear whatever color you like. If you decide to have a fall theme, the blue can still work. Think autumn leaves against a bright blue sky.

Viczaesar

Time to cut the cord.  You're an adult and should be making decisions about your wedding and your marriage with your husband, not your parents.

hockey20

 

You could have neon green in the middle of winter and it won't matter, it is your wedding and you use the colours you want, whether it's the appropriate season or not.

NerdyLucy

mallorylee0790 said:

 

The more my fiance and I talk the more I'm just ready to elope and start our lives together, because in the end that's all that really matters.

If I were you, I would.