Wedding Etiquette Forum

Send an invite? Yes or no.

A family friend (a childhood neighbor of my mom's) attended my shower this afternoon and brought along another friend my mom has in common with this family friend. This other woman was not invited to the shower nor did the invited friend RSVP to my mom that she was bringing someone was coming. It wasn't a problem. There was plenty of room...however my mom is now questioning whether we need to invite this woman to the wedding. I say no because she wasn't invited to the shower...they were the ones who broke etiquette, not me. Your thoughts?

I wouldn't question inviting her if we weren't already a few bodies over capacity in the church. It's not a reception budget issue.  The invites just went out on Saturday so it's not so long after the fact that I can't invite...but I just don't think it's necessary.

Re: Send an invite? Yes or no.

  • I agree with you -- she wasn't actually invited to the shower and she is the one who broke etiquette by showing up uninvited to a party. I wouldn't invite her.
  • She crashed your shower. She doesn't require a wedding invite.
  • I agree.  She wasn't invited to the shower, there's no need to invite her to the wedding.
    Don't worry guys, I have the Wedding Police AND the Whambulance on speed dial!
  • mlg78mlg78 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Answers
    I forgot to mention -- she did give us a gift at the shower. That doesn't change anything, right?
  • Agree with PPs. You don't have to invite her.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker

    image
  • Nope.  Just like an invitation isn't an invoice for a wedding present, a wedding present doesn't "buy" you a ticket to the wedding.

    Don't worry guys, I have the Wedding Police AND the Whambulance on speed dial!
  • mlg78mlg78 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Answers
    Thanks, ladies!
  • mlg78 said:

    I forgot to mention -- she did give us a gift at the shower. That doesn't change anything, right?

    Send her a thank you, but don't feel obligated to invite her. A cousin who is not invited to the wedding sent us a card. I called to thank her, but she's still not invited.

  • Definitely don't need to invite her to the wedding if you don't want to. Though you should send her a nice thank you note for the gift.
    image
  • Just send the uninvited guest a nice thank you note and let it go at that.  There's no need to invite her to the wedding.
  • She crashed your shower but was nice enough to bring a gift.
    You need to write a thank  you card.
    If you want to be extra super nice, you can invite her to the wedding if your budget allows, or if you feel like it, but you are not obligated to.
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards