How to tell photographer we won't be using her services?

sder0320

I met with this great photographer. But when I say great, I mean her personality. We instantly clicked. She's actually a friend of a friend, and I feel like the two of us could form a friendship. We got to chit chatting and we have a lot in common. Her pictures are of good quality, but I was attracted to her work-ethic, friendliness, and open-mindedness. Only problem is - she kind of ASSUMED that just because we showed an interest in her, we definitely want to use her services. She has sent multiple overly-excited e-mails (signing them with the word "hugs"), saying that our wedding day will be beautiful, asking if we have any questions, yada ya. Which would be great had we said that we would definitely like to book her.

We have since found a photographer whose work I ADORE. He has wonderful reviews and his photography style is exactly how I'd like for our wedding. He's less expensive, too. There are a few downsides, as he doesn't work with a second shooter and I don't believe he's quite as friendly (but I have only talked to him via e-mail) as the aforementioned photographer. But shouldn't picture quality be more important than the photographer's personality?

If we do decide to go with the photography whose work we like more, how can I let the first photographer down easy? She seemed so excited to shoot our wedding, but it's also not really fair to us as clients who simply showed an interest and never committed. She's such a nice person and I'm such a people pleaser. Help!

emmyg65

Just send her a simple email and say, "I'm sorry, but we've decided to go with someone else for our wedding." It's to-the-point but polite. She's a professional and should be used to this. Probably best to make your decision sooner than later since it sounds like she has expectations. You could at least lay the groundwork now by mentioning that you're looking at other photographers and haven't made a decision yet. Then she won't be saving your date and maybe miss other business.

photokitty

@sder0320 ~ Picture quality should be your priority. But feeling comfortable with your photog is also very important. Otherwise you won't get good shots. I wasn't willing to hire someone who didn't have a second shooter, so that was a priority for me. I think you should meet the other photog face to face before you decide.

Until you a signed contract she is just being optimistic. If she is a professional she knows it's not a done deal without the deposit and contract. Many will behave in an "assumed" manner to try and drive the sale home.

GL!

Bubbles2014

Liking your photographer is so important! We met with a photog for engagement pictures and I ended up really not liking him at all. I don't want him anywhere near my wedding. Sure his photos were good, but personality wise he was cold and business like, and I need someone I can feel comfortable with!

atlastmrsg

I'd send a cordial, but to the point note.  Something like "Thanks for keeping in touch with us.  Perhaps there was a miscommunication on our end, but we're still working on making the decision about who will photograph our wedding.  This is really important to us, so we're putting a lot of thought into it.  We will let you know if we'd like a copy of your contract and deposit information if we decide that you're the best fit for our wedding.  Thanks again, (sign name)."

This leaves space for you to send another note, once you're sure you want to use someone else, saying "Hi again.  As a follow up on my email on 9/2/2013, I just wanted to let you know that we have chosen another photographer.  Thanks again for the consultation with us, we really appreciated your time."  Or a follow up email that you do want to use her, and it's time to put your agreement on paper.

Sometimes it's easy to diffuse a tense situation by taking the burden of a miscommunication.  It lets the other person down gently, and prevents them feeling badly because they think they were wrong.  Even if it really is her bad.