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Attire and Accessories

Second thoughts about the dress

So I bought my dress a few months ago, and it came in this weekend. I had been questioning it since I bought it, and putting it on didn't solve anything. I immediately wanted to take it off. Of course I was super bummed. When I bought it, I'd been to three bridal stores and tried on probably 40 dresses. At the last store, which was huge, we for some reason were limited by our consultant to looking in their front "set up" room, not on the hundres of racks. So I settled for trying on dresses I didn't really like. After hating them all, I made her let me try on the first dress I had ever tried on again. It was the only one I didn't hate and actually felt "bridal" in. It's not an ugly dress, it's a pretty dress..but trying it on again this weekend I just didn't feel like I had hoped I'd feel. It wasn't the most beautiful I'd ever felt, I didn't love it so much that I never wanted to take it off...I just feel like when you put on your wedding dress you should cry because you're happy, not because you feel like you look just "fine". I'm at a loss---do I look for a new dress? My wedding is in about 6 months.

Re: Second thoughts about the dress

  • did you try on any other dreses anyplace else that you really loved.? i think the reason you were limited on the bigger salon was beacuse you said you went shopping for  the dress  a few months ago so thats 2 months thats 8 months out. one reason could be  is the dresses on the other racks cant get to you in time even with rush. another reason is those were out of your budget and they didnt want to show you any of those dresses.  

    this is what you should do 

    put the dress on as is without anyones help in your room or a room by yourself close your eyes and picture your wedding day your fiance your friends and family at your ceremony and reception  in this dress. can you feel your self in this dress walking down the aisle to your fiance . 

    i mean if you truly want to get another dress beacuse you dont feel like its your dress then go out again limit your self to 2 shops. let them know you have already gotten a dress but you are having remorse about it and you want to try on more dresses to see if anything can top that.

    i found a dress my mom sister and aunt loved i liked it because it was the designer i wanted my dress from mori lee but they all convinced me to try one other salon ( i am plus and its hard to find salons that have bigger samples). i went to the other salon and nothing could top the dress from the other store i kept thinking about the mori lee dress the whole time. that same day i was able to go back to the orginal salon and try it on. leaving the second salon i was crying beacuse i knew the first dress was the one for me 


    doeydo
  • It was 9 months out when I bought it, and my budget wasn't low by any means. I'd been there twice before with friends with similar/lower budgets and we were allowed to look wherever. (Price ranges are separated by floor). I think I got a bad consultant.

    The dress I got was the very first dress I'd tried on at a different store...other than that, I didn't try on anything I liked. But there wasn't a very large selection anywhere. I never had an "oh my god this is it" moment. It was just kind of "this one's okay, I'll get it"
  • I didn't cry when I put on my dress... & I posted recently about having second thoughts about mine as well! My situation is a little different than yours because I second-guessed my dress after what people said, not after how I felt.

    I definitely felt like I didn't want to take my dress off.....but with lots of time before the wedding, I believe it's normal to second-guess what you bought, & think about all the other wedding dresses out there you could have purchased. Do you not like the dress at all? Maybe you could get an alteration done, or talk to the bridal salon about an exchange or return for money/credit.

    Do you have your jewelry, veil, etc.? Maybe if you have all your accessories as well it will complete the look that you wanted. Either way, you have six more months to get the look that you've always wanted. It's not too late to fix things & truly feel like a bride!




  • It's a nice dress, and it looks okay on, but it just doesn't make me feel special... The dress was a little long and only a teeny bit big in the boobs, but otherwise it fit, so alterations I doubt would do much. I have a rhinestone belt, shoes, veil...still nothing helps.
  • i'm really sorry you feel like this :(... I bought my dress last year Sept. and i had the whole "this is the dress" moment with the water works. However, now 3 weeks from my wedding i'm second guessing it and i don't know why? I had my dress fitting a month ago and this dress fits like a glove on me so there were barely any alterations done. I started nit-picking at how each part of my dress looked on my body and started feeling really self-conscious... I don't know how I can go from loving something so much I couldn't stop smiling to now freaking out that I look like a total fool?! So I do understand your frustration and concern... i'm going through the same thing but have no choice with it being so close to the wedding.

    Good Luck!! And I bet whatever you decide to do you will be beautiful and your fiance will love it no matter what, and that's what all of us brides have to keep reminding ourselves (easier said than done! lol) :)

  • You are investing too much emotionally into this dress. It's a dress. I'm guessing you tried on that many because you were looking for a certain feeling that not everyone gets. I didn't have any waterworks when I bought my dress- and my mom and sister actually cried at a dress I hated.

    Wipe your mind clean of all your impressions, your opinions and what you want to feel and go back in there with an open mind. It will always just be a dress- how you see it is all mental.
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  • SBmini said:
    You are investing too much emotionally into this dress. It's a dress. I'm guessing you tried on that many because you were looking for a certain feeling that not everyone gets. I didn't have any waterworks when I bought my dress- and my mom and sister actually cried at a dress I hated.

    Wipe your mind clean of all your impressions, your opinions and what you want to feel and go back in there with an open mind. It will always just be a dress- how you see it is all mental.
    I second this. I never had a single teary-eyed moment trying on dresses, including the one I bought and wore on my wedding day. Not everyone has that moment - and that's perfectly ok. At the end of the day, should you really like your dress? Yes. Should you burst into tears the moment you see yourself in it? Not necessarily - it all depends on the person.

    I will also say, my BM who went dress shopping with me got all choked up when she saw me in one dress, which happened to be my least favorite of the bunch but also happened to be very similar to her wedding dress. Everyone has their own expectations of what "bridal" should look and feel like - what's important is that you find something a) in which you can sit, move, dance, etc. b) that's in your price range and c) that makes you feel good/beautiful/ready to get married.
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