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Ceremony and Vow Ideas

Who Should Walk Me Down The Aisle?

My dad recently passed away so I now don't know who should walk me down the aisle. I have an older brother, and while that may seem like the next logical choice, he and I don't really get along and I honestly don't feel any sort of connection to my brother. I worry that if I don't have my brother walk me down the aisle my mom is going to get upset because all she wants is my brother and I to be close to each other. 

My other options are walking myself, but writing in the program that my dad is symbolically walking with me. Or asking my families really really close friend who has been friends with my parents for as long as I can remember and I grew up referring to him as an uncle. I truly see him as a second father and he has shared in many important moments in my life. 

Any opinions? 

Re: Who Should Walk Me Down The Aisle?

  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom South Jersey member
    Eighth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers

    My dad recently passed away so I now don't know who should walk me down the aisle. I have an older brother, and while that may seem like the next logical choice, he and I don't really get along and I honestly don't feel any sort of connection to my brother. I worry that if I don't have my brother walk me down the aisle my mom is going to get upset because all she wants is my brother and I to be close to each other. 

    My other options are walking myself, but writing in the program that my dad is symbolically walking with me. Or asking my families really really close friend who has been friends with my parents for as long as I can remember and I grew up referring to him as an uncle. I truly see him as a second father and he has shared in many important moments in my life. 

    Any opinions? 
    First, I'm sorry to hear about the passing of your father.

    Next, you should have whoever YOU want to walk you down the aisle.  Don't let your mom influence your decision.  This is a very personal decision.  Another suggestion for you, would be to have your mom walk you down the aisle. 

    Overall, it sounds like your brother should not walk you down the aisle.  It should be someone you are close with.

    Good luck thinking through your decision.
  • doeydodoeydo Southwestern Ontario member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    Either walking by yourself and saying that your father is there in spirit or go with the person who is like your uncle.  It is completely up to you though.
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  • SP29SP29 member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I'm sorry to hear about the passing of your father.

    The person you want to walk you down the aisle should walk you- don't choose your brother to appease your mother.

    If you have a personal connection with your father's friend, go ahead and ask him to walk you. Anyone can. Likewise, your mother could, you could walk down by yourself, and I saw one ceremony on a wedding show where the B&G walked down together. 
  • Whoever you want (male/female, family/friend, etc.) or by yourself. 
    *********************************************************************************

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  • Dreamergirl8812Dreamergirl8812 your closet member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
    Definitely your decision and only your decision.



    Anniversary
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  • phiraphira Bahstin member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary 5 Answers
    I'm sorry to hear about your father :(

    Pretend for a moment that NO ONE'S feelings would be hurt by any decision you made. That whatever you decided would be perceived as a great idea by everyone.

    Would you walk down the aisle alone? Or would you walk with someone (or two someones)? Who would you ask?
    Anniversary
    now with ~* INCREASED SASSINESS *~
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    This should be your decision and not made on the basis of potential hurt feelings.

    If you prefer to walk down the aisle alone as opposed to with your brother, then that's the decision you should make.

    All the best!
  • Sorry to hear about your father's passing.

    I agree with the pp, if you and your brother don't get along and you don't want him to walk you down the aisle that's your decision. If you decide to walk by yourself that's fine also. Maybe if you have your family friend walk you down, he can hold a picture of your dad as he's walking with you to show he's standing in the place of your father, and as a memory and honor of your father.

  • Sorry to hear about your father OP. I agree with PPs about doing what you are comftorable with, don't pick someone to appease anyone.

    There are ways you can incorporate your father too. For example, I'm wearing the pearls my late father gave me when I was in high school. I've seen ladies on this board get a small photo frame and incorporate it in their bouquet, and of course you mentioned the program which is a great idea.

    I'm walking myself because it's what feels right to me, you need to find what feels right to you.
  • As others have said, you have to do what's right for you. No one else can make that decision for you. I knew once my dad passed that my mom would expect to walk me down the aisle, but I also knew that if she walked me down the aisle, I'd be thinking the entire time that she weren't my father. Same goes for anyone else. I also knew that I'd be doing the same thing if I were to walk myself, so in the end, I had to do what was right for me and make the moment as lighthearted as possible. That said, the mascot for the college I attended will be walking me down the aisle.

    Reactions? Some people said it was perfect and so fitting. Others said it didn't reflect the serious nature of the moment. But ultimately, it's what I felt would get me through the moment and that's all that people can ask of you.

    So go with your gut and don't look back.

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