Pennsylvania-Pittsburgh
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Minor vent...

Ok, 
I know this is not a huge deal, but I need to vent. A co-worker recently said to me: "My husband asked me yesterday if we would be invited to your wedding, and I told him I thought we definitely would be, but I would check... so are we?" This woman is a close co-worker, but I am trying to keep the guest list small, and wasn't going to invite anyone from work. I was caught off guard and just told her that we hadn't even started planning the guest list stuff yet. How do you respond to something like that? So awkward! 

Re: Minor vent...

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    edited December 2011
    That is tough.  You just respond by saying you are having a small wedding and that you aren't inviting anyone from the office.  Tell her it's only family and a few close friends, which means neither you nor your FI can invite anyone from the office. 
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    edited December 2011

    I agree. Just tell her that it's small and intimiate. No shame at all in that and I think your response to her was perfect.


    My question is WHY she asked. That's really an odd thing to say...

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    edited December 2011
    I think you responded fine this time- you're still a little over a year out, so I think it's pretty early for someone, esp. a coworker, to ask that! Like H said, if she asks you again, or when it gets closer, just be honest and say you're not inviting anyone from work in order to keep it small.

    As a side note, I wouldn't dare ask someone if I was invited to his or her wedding! A coworker of mine is getting married next June, and we've talked wedding stuff. I figured I'd be invited, and she said I would be, but I didn't ask first.
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    jrsygrl10jrsygrl10 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    yeah, totally inappropriate question to ask! when i was planning our wedding i had a super close coworker, but because i didnt want to invite the entire firm i couldnt invite just her..though i wanted to. but she never ever asked if she was invited, and i dont think she assumed that she would be. i ended up not working there anymore and was able to invite her anyways, so it was a moot point in the end. but still. you responded perfectly. if she asks again, tell her you had to keep the guest list small. i had one acquaintance pout about not being invited to our wedding and i simply told her that we were keeping it as small as possible and that DH's family was so large it ate up a lot of the guest list. case closed.
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    gmc22gmc22 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I agree with the pps - I just can't believe someone would ask that?!? To me, that's extremely rude... :( But as everyone else said, you responded well and if it comes up again tell her you are keeping it small.
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    edited December 2011
    i hear you! my boss (who's a major pain in the a** when it comes to innapropriate personal questions) assumes that he and his wife (who works with us, whom i can't stand) are both coming... and i'm not inviting anyone from work! i've told them that we had to cut the list way back already, but i doubt he understands. so i'm still not sure how they're going to find out, but i say if they're rude enough to ask/assume, then the response really doesn't need to be perfectly sweet.
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