Dear Prudence,
My father is 65 years old and in outstanding health. He has a small real
estate empire of 30 or so multifamily residential homes. He built the
business himself and runs it as a one-man band. Toilet clogged? My old
man fixes it so as not to have to pay someone else. The legal structure
of my dad's business is a jumble. Some homes are owned by him and my
stepmother, others are held by an LLC he formed. He also has unwritten
deals with half a dozen friends and family members. My mother lives in
another state in a house owned by my father and possibly his wife. My
father is a generous and caring person, but is disorganized and his
"office" is a bunch of piles of paper in his basement. Recently, my
sister and brother-in-law quit their jobs and sold their house to
relocate with their two small children to work in and maybe take over
this business. My father has no will or succession plan and if he were
to die or become incapacitated he would leave behind a complicated legal
mess. My sister and I would have to work with our stepmom, with whom
neither of us are close. I find it cruel, irresponsible, and selfish for
my dad not to create an estate plan. I am well-off financially, have no
direct interest in his estate, and live far away, although I speak to
my father regularly. My dad keeps promising me that he will take care of
this but he never does. I’ve brought this up so much that he’s tuning
me out. What’s the most effective way to persuade him to address the
issue?