Wedding Etiquette Forum
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seating parents and stepparents

My parents are divorced and are both with other people. Was wondering how best to seat them at the ceremony. Is it rude to have my parents sit together in front with their partners sitting behind? Save 4 seats in front and let them sort it themselves? Am I over thinking it?


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Re: seating parents and stepparents

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    I would let each parent sit with their spouse.  Just have 4 seats on the front row.
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    You should let your parents sit with their SO's. Wherever that may be is up to you, but please don't make your Mom and Dad sit together in the front row like they are still married and sit their SO's somewhere else. That will be uncomfortable for everyone.
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    I would sort it out before hand if you dad is walking you down the aisle. You don't want him to get there have the empty chair not be next to his SO. Or if it is a pew her be slide all the way to end on the other side of your mom and her SO.

    GL!
    :kiss: ~xoxo~ :kiss:

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    Seat them with their SOs. Parents are traditionally seated in the front row. 
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    Just like everyone else said, seat them with their SO. However if they don't get a long, you may want to separate them by a few seats, or have one right behind the other but still with their SO. My FI's parents are divorced and do not get along so we have to separate them unfortunately.
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    My DH's mom and her boyfriend sat on one end of the front row, and DH's dad and his wife sat on the other end.

    Problem solved.

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    itzMS said:

    My DH's mom and her boyfriend sat on one end of the front row, and DH's dad and his wife sat on the other end.

    Problem solved.


    This.
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    Under no circumstances should you separate them from their SOs - doing so would be very inconsiderate. 

    You have several options. 
    - You can sit all four of them in the front row and have them be the only people there
    - You can sit all four of them in the front row and have a sibling (if there is one) be in the middle (human barrier)
    - You can sit your mom and her SO in the front row and your dad and his SO in the second row (or vice verse)
    - You can sit your mom and her SO in the front row, sit grandparents in the second row, and sit your dad and his SO in the third row (or vice versa)

    According to our officiant, the last option is considered to be a traditional way to handle such a situation (but he is Irish, so that may not be the case where you are from). We were going to go this route if my dad had attended our wedding, since my parents' split was not cordial in the least.
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    We just had my mom, step-dad and maternal grandparents in the first row, and my dad, stepmom and paternal grandmother in the second row.
    If anyone cared or thought poorly of it, they didn't say anything and the wedding went on just fine.

    But if your parents are totally civil I see no reason why your mom and stepdad and your dad and stepmom couldn't all just sit together in the front row, assuming they are seated with their respective partners.
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    Not sure why im in the box but...My parents can get along. they barely see each other anyways so can be seated together with SO's,  BUT my mom doesnt like my dads gf (for valid reasons i wont get into) so i think i like the idea that they sit one row behind the other. its a JOP service so it will be quick anyways. I just worry that one parent may feel the other is more important based on where they sit...silly, i know! im sure when the day comes there will be a seat for everyone and i wont remember who was where...:)


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    Not sure why im in the box but...My parents can get along. they barely see each other anyways so can be seated together with SO's,  BUT my mom doesnt like my dads gf (for valid reasons i wont get into) so i think i like the idea that they sit one row behind the other. its a JOP service so it will be quick anyways. I just worry that one parent may feel the other is more important based on where they sit...silly, i know! im sure when the day comes there will be a seat for everyone and i wont remember who was where...:)
    If it's a JOP service, let them seat themselves. Block off the first couple of rows and let them know ahead of time you've blocked that off for them and they can sit wherever they want. They'll figure it out and you won't be on the hook for making the decisions.
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