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No MOH just Bridemaids

I just want to start by asking is it wrong to not have a MOH?  According to my FMIL and some other family members it is.  I am getting married in August so i recently asked my four closest friends to be my BM's.  One of them I have been friends with since grade school and we are still close even though she lives in HI!!!! Another maid is my FSIL and friend since I met my then boy friend (who lives in NY and is moving to NH).  My other two friends both live near me in PA.  All I am asking of my BM's is to show up on time and in a dress within the parameters set up. (length/color/fabric)
Yesterday my FMIL asked me which one of the girls is going to be the MOH.  I told her that I couldn't put one friend above the other and that I love them all equally.  She seemed confused and then proceeded to ask, well how can you not have a MOH?  I told her I didn't want any one girl to be above the others.  Besides I had already asked them to be Birdesmaids...wouldn't it be strange then come back to one and ask her to be a Maid of Honor instead?  At this she dropped it and we went on to a different topic, but this got me thinking...is it a crime not to have a Maid of Honor?  
Antonia9984

Re: No MOH just Bridemaids

  • doeydodoeydo Southwestern Ontario member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    No, there is nothing wrong with having BMs and no MOH.
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    southernbelle0915
  • You don't need an MOH. Your plan sounds great!
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  • Thanks ladies, I guess I just needed to know that I'm not the crazy one, being that both my FMIL and my aunt were all amazed by my decision!
  • I'm having 3BMs and no MOH.  I've definitely had people ask about it, but no major side-eyes (well, that I know of). 
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • I had 5 bridemaids: My 3 best friends, and 2 SILs.  No "MOH."  Could not imagine picking one of the 3 best friends, so they were all bridesmaids.  But my 3 best friends pretty much took on the role on their own.  They hosted my bachelorette party and did the "toast" together.  My mom thought I was crazy but at the end of the day it would have been odd to have 3 MOH and 2 BM so I went with 5 Bridesmaids.  end of the day it is just a title, they do not do anything different.  The one who happened to stand closest to me held my bouquet, and one of them asked to sign the marriage license.  
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    Anniversary
  • I'm not having a MOH either! Just four bridemaids! All that matters is that they communicate when it comes to your shower and bachelorette.
  • I was in a friend's wedding last year and she didn't technically have a MOH either. There were only 3 of us, and she asked me to hold her bouquet and sign the marriage certificate but other than that we were all equal and it was fine!
  • I wish I had thought to do this, it would have be so much easier to have them all equal. I have 2 BM and my cousin is my MOH, but they're all pretty much equal as it is. I wish I thought to go just BM rather than giving one of them the title of MOH
  • ViczaesarViczaesar Central Coast, CA member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    anniebrx said:
    I'm not having a MOH either! Just four bridemaids! All that matters is that they communicate when it comes to your shower and bachelorette.
    It's not their job to host a shower and/or bachelorette party, so no, that doesn't matter at all.



  • Just bridesmaids for me!  We are having a smaller wedding (65-75ish) and decided we will just have our siblings in the wedding party.  3 sister/sis in laws and 3 bothers between us so worked out evenly.  I am not selectioning any of them as more important than the others and see no reason to.  my mom has thought it's crazy to not have a MOH, but I don't see why i have to have one!  I've told them to pick their own dress (gave them the color) but I am not asking anything more of them.  they are important in my life and i just want them to be part of the day with me. 
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