Wedding Party

Multiple maids of honor?

My wedding party will consist of the following: 2 of my sisters, 2 of his sisters, and 5 of my best friends.I know that it is a lot, but it's what I want. All of the sisters are too young to be the MOH, except for one, but she is getting married, plus being a part of 6 other weddings this summer, so she's not really an option.  I really cannot choose just one of these friends as the MOH because I love all of them equally. There's not really one that stands out as the perfect MOH. SO I've decided that I have two options: have no MOH, or to ask all of my friends to be my MOH's. Of course, I would make sure they realize that they will all be MOH's. I'm not really expecting them to do anything for me, they would all be willing to help with little tasks anyways. I just want some way to distinguish them from my sisters in the wedding party. Is this completely inappropriate? Which option do you think is best? 

On another note, no two bridesmaids are in the same town except for the sisters. They are all in different states - from California to Virginia - and two are out of the country right now.

Re: Multiple maids of honor?

  • 1. No one could ever be too young to be a MOH unless they can't stand next to you for 20-30 minutes. 

    2. Why would a friend getting married and being in other weddings prevent her from being your MOH?

    3. Why would the bridesmaids being in other state have anything to do with MOH?

    3. I personally would just not have a MOH. Being a bridesmaid is an honor. I think rather than playing a weird game of everybody wins or eenie meenie miny mo, it's probably best to just not have one. 
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  • My wedding party will consist of the following: 2 of my sisters, 2 of his sisters, and 5 of my best friends.I know that it is a lot, but it's what I want. All of the sisters are too young to be the MOH, except for one, but she is getting married, plus being a part of 6 other weddings this summer, so she's not really an option.  I really cannot choose just one of these friends as the MOH because I love all of them equally. There's not really one that stands out as the perfect MOH. SO I've decided that I have two options: have no MOH, or to ask all of my friends to be my MOH's. Of course, I would make sure they realize that they will all be MOH's. I'm not really expecting them to do anything for me, they would all be willing to help with little tasks anyways. I just want some way to distinguish them from my sisters in the wedding party. Is this completely inappropriate? Which option do you think is best? 

    On another note, no two bridesmaids are in the same town except for the sisters. They are all in different states - from California to Virginia - and two are out of the country right now.

    Ditto PDKH. 

    Age doesn't matter.  My niece was just MOH in my sister's wedding along with me.  I signed the marriage license, but my niece still stood up in front during the ceremony with the rest of us.  I wouldn't try to distinguish your sisters from your friends, it will make some of them feel not as important as the rest.  And if you make the 5 friends MOH, that will make the sisters feel not as important. 
  • Ditto everything above.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • I hate it when people have more than maybe 2 MOHs. I think it's just silly.  If for whatever weird reason (yes, from what I've heard so far, your reasoning is weird) you don't want your sisters to be your MOH, have just BMs and no MOH.
  • I don't want a sister to be MOH because there are 4 to choose from and I'm not doing that. Plus, 2 of them are young enough to be junior bridesmaids. I will just not have any MOH. 
  • PDKH said:
    1. No one could ever be too young to be a MOH unless they can't stand next to you for 20-30 minutes. 

    2. Why would a friend getting married and being in other weddings prevent her from being your MOH?

    3. Why would the bridesmaids being in other state have anything to do with MOH?

    3. I personally would just not have a MOH. Being a bridesmaid is an honor. I think rather than playing a weird game of everybody wins or eenie meenie miny mo, it's probably best to just not have one. 

    This exactly.  I am not having a MOH because my BMs are all very special to me in different ways.  It seemed stupid to make them al MOH's so I just kept them as BMs.
  • There are definitely pros and cons to each option.

    I was initially going to have three bridesmaids (with two maids of honor).  My two sisters were going to be MOH, and my best friend is a bridesmaid.  I originally just wanted one sister and the MOH (she would be sort of a rock for me while I'm stressing out) and then I felt that asking both would be better so there would be no hard feelings. The "rock" sister has since removed herself from my wedding, since she was too busy planning her own (even though she wasn't engaged).  I now have my other sister as MOH and my best friend as a bridesmaid.

    But now I'm unsure of that choice and I'm wondering if picking no attendants at all would've been the wiser decision.  The remaining sister is a bit flakey and doesn't balance responsibilities very well.  She has the amazing power of keeping me calm (since she is a very calm person herself) but I feel like as far as helping me with the planning goes, she might be a lost cause. My best friend is having a hard time supporting the things I've picked out for the wedding, so I feel like her "support" is more hurtful than helpful.  I wonder often if having no bridesmaids would've been the better choice for me, because then I wouldn't be stressed about their opinions! (And I wouldn't have to feel bad about the sister who's removed herself from the party).

     

    In your shoes I think I would opt for no MOH.  Especially since the majority of them are spread out and don't live close. That way whoever wants to share in certain parts of planning process can do so, and those who are too far away don't feel as though they're letting you down by not being there to help.

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  • I was a Jr Bridemaid in the early 90s so its not a fad its a "title" you can give young ladies that are too young to BM ( 17 & up) & too old for flower girl (3-8). Or at least thats what I have read.

    My sisters are not my MOH my 2 best friends are! I say do what you feel is right. If you cant just pick one then all should be Bridemaids because it is a honor & no need to cause drama because htere is always one that will get upset.

  • jenniferursjenniferurs member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    edited November 2013
    I'm having 2 maids of honor, a matron of honor, 2 bridesmaids, and 5 bridesmen. I really don't think there's any "right" or "wrong" answer here, so long as you understand that the title/honor should not be given based on who can (or cannot) help you the most.
  • I have my 2 sisters and my future sister in law standing up in my wedding (among 3 other BMs) and while my sisters are only 14 and 18, they are my SISTERS so there was no question about who would be MOH. My fiance's sister is lovely too but I never felt like she was in the running for MOH simply because she was a sister. My sisters may be young and might not have any wedding experience but when you think about your big day just think about what is really important, your sisters would surely be honored to be your MOH and do the best they can! :)
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