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Don't want to invite FI's nasty relative to my bridal shower... help

Years ago, my FI's cousin hosted a party on New Years Eve, at her house.  She becomes belligerent when she drinks excessively.  As the night wore on, she accused me of making a pass at her husband!  She got in my face and called me a wh*re.  Okay,  I hate to state the obvious, but I was there with MY boyfriend.... her cousin!  Why would I try to pick up any man, let alone someone in my FI's family?  It was so utterly absurd.  She became so violent, her husband had to stop her from coming after me.  She clawed his face so bad, it look like he got into a car accident. My FI is adamant, that she be invited to our wedding.  Fine.  I will just try to avoid her and hope she doesn't make a scene.  There will be a lot of people there so that should be easier to do.  The bridal shower is being hosted by my step-mother and sister, and I really don't want this woman in my family's house.  She is my FI's guest... NOT MINE.  It was about 6 years ago since this happened.  She never talks to me at social functions, and has never apologized for her behavior.  She has gone to two other weddings after she went nuts on me and made a scene at both, and another one she had to be taken away by an ambulance for a meltdown.  Her mom is the sweetest person.  Can I invite his aunt without inviting her daughter?  How would I answer questions if people asked?

Re: Don't want to invite FI's nasty relative to my bridal shower... help

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    What a tough one. Your FI wants her to be there, so that puts you in a tight spot. I would talk to him, and say the thought of her being there is making you crazy. If that doesn't work, You can hire security or designate someone to watch her for your wedding reception, and they can boot her right out the first sign of trouble. 
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    I'd also post this on the etiquette board.  I'm admittedly no expert on etiquette, but if it were me I'd have my stepmother/sister invite the aunt and not the cousin.  What's nice about the bridal shower is I think it can be more lax about who gets invitations than a wedding is (as long as all invitees are also invited to the wedding).  I mean, people don't usually invite everyone to the shower that is coming to the wedding.

    It sounds like she doesn't like you anyway because she is a wacko, crazy person so what is the harm in not inviting her? That she will like you less and think you are a b***h. No biggie. If you're lucky, maybe she will be so in a tizzy about not being invited to the shower that she won't come to the wedding either.  Win-Win lol.

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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