WR question (not for me lol)

buddysmom80 · February 2013

Okay, so we're all scratching our heads here at work, and maybe some of you ladies can help us out. My friend found a venue she really likes, but the pricing on the menus is a little confusing.

Example 1 is a sit down dinner:
The prices are by each entree. Chicken is $40 pp, surf and turf is $55 etc. So when she gets all her RSVPs back, she has to pay the difference from her deposit and subsequent payments and what people requested? If she paid for the venue assuming EVERYONE would request chicken and everyone requested surf and turf, would she have to pay the $15 difference?

Example 2 is a cocktail reception:
Same thing, every appetizer has a price next to it, it's not a total per person. Are they going to charge her per appetizer serving?

Any comments, advice, questions would be helpful because we are all stumped (and there's about six of us scratching our heads right now on a conference call lol)

tuarceatha · February 2013

Hm. Well the way my venue did it, was an estimate was originally given for a generic menu, then later we picked our menu and the price was adjusted. As for how much we paid, we paid three times for the food. The first time was a % of the original estimate, second time was another % of the estimate and then 2 weeks before the date, we paid the balance based on the actual # of fish dishes, chicken dishes, steaks, and veggie options. Same deal though, each dish was a different price, and we just agreed on an estimate in the planning and then the only adjustment was the actual number of each entree based on RSVPs.

buddysmom80 · February 2013

Thanks so much!

How did your mom's birthday weekend go?

[Deleted User] · February 2013

I agree with what Jen said. You will pay for which entree your guests pick. Your caterer should be able to give you a good estimate of how many people will choose chicken vs surf and turf. If you know your families are big red-meat eaters...you might want to up that side of the count for your estimate to make it (hopefully) is more accurate.

For appetizers, they are priced per piece. So for example, you might pick 3 different passed appetizers at prices of $1.50, $1/75 and $2. If you have 100 guests and your only ordering one piece of each per guest, that would total to $525 total for your aps.

ETA - I realize this advice is for someone else and not your wedding...but it was easier to write my response like it was for you.

tuarceatha · February 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wr-question-not-for-me-lol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:5754793a-0c32-4614-90cc-40dc73a98fe0Post:db82f0a3-abd8-4da2-9762-cdf520648603">Re: WR question (not for me lol)</a>:
[QUOTE]Thanks so much! How did your mom's birthday weekend go?
Posted by buddysmom80[/QUOTE]

:)
Twas a success! My mom was super surprised and keeps saying thank you. The house guests seemed very happy as well.

Also, I think like 60% of our guests ordered the steak dish (much more than the caterer's estimate), but we also estimated for 150 people, and only 120 attended, so yea.

buddysmom80 · February 2013

She's leaning more towards half and half since her FI's family is more of a steak and potatoes type and her family enjoys chicken, pork, fish. She's on a tight budget, but so far she's confident it's going to work out for this venue since they want to get married during an off-season and the place gives a HUGE discount for off-season rates as well as cash discounts.

She just got engaged over V-day, so I know she's really excited (as am I for her!!!)

Jen-did you get 60000 count sheets for the guest bedroom??? I was laughing on Saturday because I had to re-fold all of my sheets (boyfriend just throws clean sheets in the linen closet) and I'm like "I use the CHEAPEST sheets for my guest bedrooms!"

tuarceatha · February 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wr-question-not-for-me-lol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:5754793a-0c32-4614-90cc-40dc73a98fe0Post:3d70cb18-8c4a-4377-8b3b-663732e11c24">Re: WR question (not for me lol)</a>:
[QUOTE]Jen-did you get 60000 count sheets for the guest bedroom??? I was laughing on Saturday because I had to re-fold all of my sheets (boyfriend just throws clean sheets in the linen closet) and I'm like "I use the CHEAPEST sheets for my guest bedrooms!"
Posted by buddysmom80[/QUOTE]

haha I actually had to give my sisters BEACH towels for blankets when they decided last minute to spend the night too. It was my two uncles, one uncle's gf, my aunt, my mom, and my two sisters sleeping over the last night.

peekaboo2011 · February 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wr-question-not-for-me-lol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:5754793a-0c32-4614-90cc-40dc73a98fe0Post:04b520b3-218e-46bb-838b-bb32ac195399">Re: WR question (not for me lol)</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: WR question (not for me lol) : haha I actually had to give my sisters BEACH towels for blankets when they decided last minute to spend the night too. It was my two uncles, one uncle's gf, my aunt, my mom, and my two sisters sleeping over the last night.
Posted by jenjenniferf[/QUOTE]

<div>You should have called me. I have a million super soft and warm blankets sitting under my bed.</div>

Peaseblossom55 · February 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wr-question-not-for-me-lol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:5754793a-0c32-4614-90cc-40dc73a98fe0Post:29cf6225-3357-4561-a8ee-f129ece4c2fa">Re: WR question (not for me lol)</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: WR question (not for me lol) : :) Twas a success! My mom was super surprised and keeps saying thank you. The house guests seemed very happy as well. Also, I think like 60% of our guests ordered the steak dish (much more than the caterer's estimate), but we also estimated for 150 people, and only 120 attended, so yea.
Posted by jenjenniferf[/QUOTE]

Glad your mom's surprise went so well! I meant to ask you about that!

tuarceatha · February 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wr-question-not-for-me-lol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:5754793a-0c32-4614-90cc-40dc73a98fe0Post:0065a350-5049-4e74-a063-caa2bdc3990f">Re: WR question (not for me lol)</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: WR question (not for me lol) : You should have called me. I have a million super soft and warm blankets sitting under my bed.
Posted by peekaboo2011[/QUOTE]

aw! It was like 10pm and 8 out of 9 people were drunk, and they were lucky we had couch and air mattress space available!

tuarceatha · February 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wr-question-not-for-me-lol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:5754793a-0c32-4614-90cc-40dc73a98fe0Post:cafd6668-2a3d-4524-9b13-f6971037a413">Re: WR question (not for me lol)</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: WR question (not for me lol) : Glad your mom's surprise went so well! I meant to ask you about that!
Posted by danser55[/QUOTE]

Thanks! This weekend is her actual bday so my sisters and I are entertaining her all day Saturday.

buddysmom80 · February 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wr-question-not-for-me-lol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:5754793a-0c32-4614-90cc-40dc73a98fe0Post:0065a350-5049-4e74-a063-caa2bdc3990f">Re: WR question (not for me lol)</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: WR question (not for me lol) : You should have called me. I have a million super soft and warm blankets sitting under my bed.
Posted by peekaboo2011[/QUOTE]

My aunt knits and crochets so I have an over abundance of blankets and afghans as well lol.

suzie211 · February 2013

My venue is priced very similarly. Chicken and pasta dishes are the base price in ours. Everything else is additional. Once the menu is finalized we'll have a closer estimate to the new total and what to expect to bring for our final payments.

We were also told that if steak is offered over chicken or pasta, 60% of guests will choose this option so it can significantly up the price per head if there is an extra charge for it. Ours suggested we also add in a fish option that would move some guests away from the highest priced menu offering and help lower overall cost. It's still more, but it means we wouldn't be paying the highest charge up for so many of our guests. Not sure if that helps with a surf and turf option, but you get the idea.

Gotta love the meat and potato lovers! Hope it works out for your friend!

buddysmom80 · February 2013

Thanks Suzie. We were just confused because a ton of the venues around here you pay X amount per person and you have a choice of beef, chicken or seafood/vegetarian so when we saw the menu we were like "wth???"

She originally wanted to do either a cocktail reception or sit down dinner but did a rough draft of what the cost pp would be for each and they were coming up about the same per person.

It's funny because she called asking if they gave cash discounts and they gave her a special that's 55.00 pp and it's definetly in her budget and has all the works (minus open bar, but she's doing a cash bar???). But will take a cash discount as well as the off-season discount which is driving her cost down dramatically.

Now I have another question. We were talking during lunch and she said she's going to skip on a photographer since it's something she's not big on and can't afford a wedding photographer in this area. Would it be appropriate/inappropriate to give this to her as a gift? My friend is an up and coming photographer and is doing weddings for a reduced rate as long as she can use the photos in her portfolio. Is this tacky or offensive?

suzie211 · February 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wr-question-not-for-me-lol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:5754793a-0c32-4614-90cc-40dc73a98fe0Post:f7359a64-2562-4b3e-a111-1fb9c50ee439">Re: WR question (not for me lol)</a>:
[QUOTE] We were talking during lunch and she said she's going to skip on a photographer since it's something she's not big on and can't afford a wedding photographer in this area. Would it be appropriate/inappropriate to give this to her as a gift? My friend is an up and coming photographer and is doing weddings for a reduced rate as long as she can use the photos in her portfolio. Is this tacky or offensive?
Posted by buddysmom80[/QUOTE]

I think that is an extremely generous gift, but I would possibly let her know you are thinking of doing this for her gift. I did something very similar with my sister for her wedding, but instead of pay for the whole package I helped pay for it making a photographer part of their budget.

Honestly, photos were important to me so I thought she should have them and would want pictures of our family. But because we just did such a basic package, nothing really has been done with the pictures. They're just on a disc. The package was cheap, but we still have to pay to print out any pics or pay for any albums. That wasn't in her budget, and I didn't think of that when we got the package. It just wasn't a priority.

If you're friend really wants pics, but just can't afford them this will be a great way for her to have some. But if they really aren't that importan, there are ways to have pics with out a professional. She'll probably have friends taking pics that she can use. There are new smartphone apps out there that can be downloaded and shared at weddings that can be used to take photos just like the disposables used to.

buddysmom80 · February 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wr-question-not-for-me-lol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:5754793a-0c32-4614-90cc-40dc73a98fe0Post:33373425-7d60-4867-a4b7-41d0297926ed">Re: WR question (not for me lol)</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: WR question (not for me lol) : I think that is an extremely generous gift, but I would possibly let her know you are thinking of doing this for her gift. I did something very similar with my sister for her wedding, but instead of pay for the whole package I helped pay for it making a photographer part of their budget. Honestly, photos were important to me so I thought she should have them and would want pictures of our family. <strong>But because we just did such a basic package, nothing really has been done with the pictures. They're just on a disc</strong>. The package was cheap, but we still have to pay to print out any pics or pay for any albums. That wasn't in her budget, and I didn't think of that when we got the package. It just wasn't a priority. If you're friend really wants pics, but just can't afford them this will be a great way for her to have some. But if they really aren't that importan, there are ways to have pics with out a professional. She'll probably have friends taking pics that she can use. There are new smartphone apps out there that can be downloaded and shared at weddings that can be used to take photos just like the disposables used to.
Posted by suzie211[/QUOTE]

I think that would be a good idea. I just want to make sure it isn't a wedding faux pas. I know my friend who just got married last year had her pictures on a disc no photobook or parent's book or anything like that and she did her wedding album on snapfish. She also did the layout on her thank you cards which were amazing. Her photographer charged her $2000 just for the disc though (I think he retouched photos as well). My photographer friend is willing to do it for a lot less, re-touch photos and put them on a disc as well as print out a few for her.

I'm going to wait to bring it up with the bride. This is her second wedding, her first was such a rush job and she was so miserable because of it. She wants this wedding to be better than the first one, but has a lot of financial issues and I just want to help out any way I can.

Thanks for the advice. I haven't helped a close friend out with a wedding in a long time, so I feel like I forgot everything.

WR question (not for me lol)

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