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July 2010 Weddings

ok, really? we're not even married yet...

And people are already asking when we're planning on having babies!  

Anyone else having this akward question come up?

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Re: ok, really? we're not even married yet...

  • I'm getting the baby question like crazy! Everyone seems to want to know when we plan on starting a family.  My response is always the same...."lets just get through the wedding first, and then we will talk about it".  Even my dad (and if you knew my dad you would know why it's so surprising coming from him) stated that he would have grandkids within the year.  At this point we were still about 5 months from the wedding.  I said "Dad, the wedding is still 5 monts away, and then pregnancy takes 9 months.  You can't possibly have a grandkid in a year".  Dad responds "well can't you just start now?"   UGH!!!  Seriously. I can only imagine it's going to get worse after the wedding!
  • I would just tell people it's none of their goddamn business.
  • I tell them that we are already trying (which we are) and most people are just like "oh ok" sooo totally didnt expect that answer from me

  • I think I'm the only one that hasn't gotten that question yet. My mom is pretty much okay with us waiting. I've mentioned babies a few times to see what her reaction is, and she flips out a little each time, haha. We're hoping to wait a couple of years before TTC, but we'll figure it out when we're ready.
  • We're actually wanting to start right away, its just weird talking to family & friends about our sex life.

    And then you get the one's who try to change your mind and tell you what you should do.  I just smile & nod. Only the couple really knows what they're ready for and what they want.
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  • Of course, we are trying because of the fact that MY clock is ticking ticking ticking.....I want to be a SAHM/Housewife so bad
  • Ha no!  My friends and family wouldn't even dare ask that.  We are both very focused on our careers right now.
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  • A week after we got engaged FI's dad said he expected a grandkid the first week of April, 2011!
  • My mom has been asking that since I was like 20, and I have not even had a boyfriend until 3 years ago when I met FH!
  • CourtAndDougCourtAndDoug member
    edited June 2010
    I think other than the deacon (in our premarital counseling, to see if we had discussed it) asked when we are planning on having kids. I think FMIL would be the first to want to know because our children would be her first grandchildren (and she's already stated that we should wait a few years to have a "honeymoon" time before kids.) where as my side already has my niece. We've been together for almost 6 years so I think most everyone figures we've come to a decision on when we want kids and they don't care about when.

    PS When I called my MOH to tell her we got engaged, she asked me when the date was and I came back with "When are you having babies?" (at the time she had been married for a year and a half). The line went silent. Probably because neither one of us really had and answer for each other at that time.
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  • ive been getting that question from FIs family since 3 weeks after dating him. That was 5 years ago. they are coming more now and its so awkward. Sorry, you dont get to tell me when i should start having babies. that will be between my husband and me.

    and we're waiting at least 2 years. we are still young and want to enjoy married life first!

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  • People haven't been asking me, but have been asking my mom (weird). I want to know why the condition of my uterus is so important to people now that I'm getting married...
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  • My mom has been bugging me with that one since I was 20 too. 
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  • yeah, I get that one.  And LOTS of bets that we will be pregnant within the year, which just makes me want to wait to spite them!  I like to fire back with something as sarcastic as possible, like "well, we are waiting to have sex until our first anniversary.  We just don't want to rush things..." even though we live together now:)
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  • I'm into the total shock value answer too. IMO, asking that is rude, and people do it to me all the time.

    My stock answer is, "When I'm ready to be fat." -- it makes them feel akward, which is exactly the emotion that i feel when they ask me that!
  • I've gotten a few.  It's mostly coming from family and closer friends that know that my sister is never having kids.  So it's all up to me to give our parents grandchildren.  Talk about pressure!  At least she's accepted that it'll be a few years before that happens.

    A lady at my bridal shower said that every ribbon you cut or tear is a kid you'll have--I got up to seven before I found this out!  So untie your ribbons by hand!
  • The wedding was 8 days ago, and all of the grandkids were there.  One is only 5 months old (husband's side) and my mom was holding him.  then she looked at my new MIL and said, "what do you think?  Do you want another grandson or a granddaughter next?" 
    Really Mom?  You know I am on birth control and I don't feel like telling my new MIL on my wedding day that I am taking some serious precautions so I don't get preggo til I am ready...and right now is not the time for that!

    So yes, I totally feel you there!
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