(Possibly former) fiance and I had a huge fight last night over the guest list. He has a tendency to be stubborn and selfish and jump into feeling he gets screwed rather than explaining why something is important to him, when I'm not in sync with something he wants. He was trying to say I need to tentatively try to find out which of my guests are coming so HE can invite more people if we are going to get a lot of regrets. I said it is far too early to ask people if they might be coming, and for various reasons including space-wise, money-wise, and I'm-not-comfortable-with-social-gatherings-wise, I don't think it is wise to use tentative regrets to prioritize the guest list and/or tack on more people when I had already estimated a certain number of people which I felt was reasonable who would not attend. I don't trust him that if I let him tack on more people now he will not think of more that he wants to tack on before we sent out invitations in nine or ten months. (He wants me to trust him, but knowing him and his past behavior, I don't). Plus he didn't offer to contact any of HIS guests until I pointed out that he also has out of town guests that may not come. It got to the point where I told him I refuse to continue any further wedding discussion without a mediator.
This is why I didn't want a wedding in the first place other than immediate family. I didn't even turn on the TV to see Kate's wedding dress this morning. I just don't care about weddings and am not sure I want to marry someone who is going to be such a brat and insensitive to me when I don't agree with him.
Whoever said it was supposed to be happily ever after is a big fat liar.