S/O Funeral

VarunaTT · November 2010

Just b/c I'm curious.

I refuse to walk past an open casket. I read one time that the ones you love the most are the ones that you have the worse time remembering their face b/c you see it in so many different expressions. I'm afraid with their face so still, that is the image that will be burned into my head and that's not the memory I want. When we buried Dr. Bartee, I sat in front with her other students/faculty and I almost had to move b/c it was too close.

Will you go to the casket if it's open?

MrsMyrtle · November 2010

Yes. It's one last moment to spend with that person, even if it's just their body and not their soul.

MinM · November 2010

Every funeral I have attended I have visted the casket, open or not. It is how we do it in my family. Also, you take a flower from the arrangement on the casket.

mrsoh · November 2010

I have gone to the open casket, and it's never as bad as I think it's going to be.

On the other hand, I refused to visit my grandfather in his last couple of weeks because I didn't want my last memories of him to be in a nursing home. He'd been and alzheimer's patient for going on 9 years, and had recently been diagnosed with lung cancer (it was so aggressive it spread from his lungs, to a lymph node, and his spine in a matter of weeks). My grandmother had just made the decision to move them out of their home here of 46 years and into a care facility for him and a smaller apartment for her near my aunt in SoCal. I was there the day they pulled out of the driveway for the drive south, and I knew that day I would never see him again.

zsazsa-stl · November 2010

I've never been to a funeral where the person looked too much like themselves in the casket. I don't have a problem going to the casket because I know that isn't really "them" inside. They have gone on and this is just the shell. So while I remember the face in the casket enough to remember that the looked overly made-up and unnatural, that definately isn't the face I see in my head when I remember the person.

**O-Face** · November 2010

Varuna. I am with you. I have never really wanted to see the casket. I will float past, without looking in. I cannot bear it.

mrsconn23 · November 2010

I will look because I can't look away, but I really don't like open caskets. They make me uncomfortable.

Sposati · November 2010

A little morbid, but my mom wanted an open casket viewing for just the immediate family and a few friends when my sister was murdered. What I didn't know was that she had been beaten and obviously strangled. Before the viewing, I was just told that she was held down and given a hot shot to make it look like an OD. I will never forget that image seared into my head of my sister, and I still can't believe they spared me those details before I actually saw her. And I REALLY don't understand why they wanted to remember her that way or have an open casket at all. Just seems like torture to me to actually see it.

Cant_wait! · November 2010

Not anymore. I want to remember my loved ones alive and full of life. When my grandmother died it was an open casket, and I put my hand on hers, and it was the worst feeling ever.

mrsconn23 · November 2010

Oh Spos, that's just awful. I can't even imagine.

DH's BFF was T-boned and basically the whole left side of his face was blown out from smashing into the drivers side window upon impact. They had an open casket. They made sure his right side was toward the crowd, but when you were upon the casket, you could see the the damage/disfigurement. No amount of make up was going to cover that up.

6fsn · November 2010

Holy hell spos that's terrible.

I've never had a problem with open caskets. I remember my dad pitching a fit over his mom's lipstick.

TheDuckis · November 2010

I hate it. I absolutely hate it, but I always do it. I always have to hang out at the back of the room for awhile, then catch a glimpse out of the corner of my eye, and slowly work my way up. I will say that the way the person looks in their casket is never actually the way I remember them.

Spos, I can't imagine.

w102mmd · November 2010

i am scared to death of open caskets. I have a story like Spos's, my dad was electocuted when I was 11 and among many things, it charred him purple, blew up his internal organs (so his body appeared bloated), and no amnt of make up would make him look like my daddy.

And then after sitting there for hours on end, i started to think he was moving. It was awful.

PMeg819 · November 2010

God Spos that's horrible. I agree with you though...open casket is horrible. Similar to MrsConn but I had a friend in HS that was in a horrible car accident. They tried to cover it up with makeup but he looked so unnatural and you could see the damage faintly underneath that it was horrifying. I always think of him in that way and I hate it.

S/O Funeral

Re: S/O Funeral

Choose Another Board

Search Boards