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my mom remarrying, does she need to invite my fiance's whole family?

pulchi21pulchi21
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
My mom is getting married December 2010 and my fiance and I are getting married May 2011.  My mom is definitely going to invite my fiance's parents to her wedding in December.  However, we are not sure if we should also include my fiance's brother, sister, and sister's fiance.  Is there a correct or polite thing to do?  My mom obviously has a relationship with my fiance's parents because of our upcoming wedding, and she has been around my fiance's brother and sister a handful of times.  If my fiance's sister is invited her fiance also must invited, but my mom has only been around him maybe once or twice.

Basically, my fiance's parents are being invited to my mom's wedding because we think that is the polite and right thing to do.  We definitely dont want to hurt anyone's feelings and make things awkward for my wedding in May 2011... What is the best thing to do about the rest of his family?
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Re: my mom remarrying, does she need to invite my fiance's whole family?

  • Beachy730Beachy730 member
    5000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    No you don't have to invite them.  My parents have been invited to plenty of weddings that I haven't been.  I don't even think its necessary to invite the parents either.  Just because you are marrying their son doesn't mean your and his parents are required to be close.  But that is their choice. 
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  • emilyinchileemilyinchile member
    5000 Comments
    It's not at all necessary to invite any of your FI's family, although if your mom has been spending time with his parents and wants to invite them, that's fine too.
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  • ichellemay1ichellemay1
    500 Comments
    I agree with PP.  She doesn't "need" to invite them, but if they have a relationship because of you and FI - that is fine.
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  • ohwhynotohwhynot member
    2500 Comments

    I really don;t understand why your mom is inviting any of them.  She certainly has no obligation to do so, and frankly I find it a little strange.  It's not impolite or wrong, but neither is it "the polite and right thing to do."  It would be perfectly okay not to invite them at all. 

    But if she wants to, it's okay to invite just the parents.  

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  • mica178mica178 member
    5000 Comments Fourth Anniversary 5 Love Its

    I don't think she needs to invite anyone but you and FI, unless she is independently friendly with them.  If her whole relationship with your FI's family revolves around wedding planning, that's really not much of a relationship and does not require an invitation to her wedding if she doesn't want to invite them.

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  • eastunder1eastunder1
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited November 2010
    I think the real awkwardness would be being invited to something as personal as a wedding for someone you barely know just because your kids are getting married to each other.  THATS awkward.  Because they would feel like they have to go.   Now if they have met and become friends over time, thsts one thing.  But if its just out of some perceived sense of obligation, I have no idea why she would invite them in the first place.  Any of them. 

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  • squirrlysquirrly member
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    She needs to invite your FI.  Other than that, it's not at all necessary.  And maybe even kind of odd.

    If your FIs siblings still live at home and she's inviting his parents, she should invite the siblings.  And if she invites one sibling, invite them all, including their SOs.

    But, if her wedding is in December, the invitations should likely have gone out already.  So - HUSTLE.
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