Is is rude to NOT open gifts at your bridal shower?

bellekristin83 · March 2010

Seriously...Sucrets...you're rude and ignorant...share your opinion, fine...but don't act like everyone else's doesn't matter or that your opinion is fact, that's why it's called an opinion...RUDE.

[Deleted User] · March 2010

Yeah, but Sucrets's opinion does matter more because she is counted as two people. Unless, of course, her baby disagrees with her and then they would cancel each other out.

So maybe instead of wasting your time getting all butthurt over nothing, you should be focusing your energy on convincing her baby that you are right. Just a thought.

sucrets4 · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-not-open-gifts-bridal-shower?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:8a20e93b-c664-4a63-b570-80ca313efd24Post:488ed7d9-1c3b-40c2-8ded-3636b313222b">Re: Is is rude to NOT open gifts at your bridal shower?</a>:
[QUOTE]Seriously...Sucrets...you're rude and ignorant...share your opinion, fine...but don't act like everyone else's doesn't matter or that your opinion is fact, that's why it's called an opinion...RUDE.
Posted by bellekristin83[/QUOTE]

How on earth am I ignorant? Please explain.

And that's wonderful that your OPINION is that I'm rude. I'll be sure to take that into careful consideration in the future. On the Snarky Brides board.

cew - if my unborn baby can get me into the HOV lane, it sure as heck better make my opinion count for more than anyone else's!

SarahSmile23 · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-not-open-gifts-bridal-shower?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:8a20e93b-c664-4a63-b570-80ca313efd24Post:eca67406-8365-4e16-9e60-f422a1e9387b">Re: Is is rude to NOT open gifts at your bridal shower?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Is is rude to NOT open gifts at your bridal shower? : How on earth am I ignorant? Please explain. And that's wonderful that your OPINION is that I'm rude. I'll be sure to take that into careful consideration in the future. On the Snarky Brides board. cew - if my unborn baby can get me into the HOV lane, it sure as heck better make my opinion count for more than anyone else's!
Posted by sucrets4[/QUOTE]
apparently, ignorant now means, "i disagree with you but cannot articulate why so i am going to insult you."

Kimbie1127 · March 2010

For my shower, the host has asked everyone invited to not wrap the gifts and instead donate whatever they would have spent to wrap the gifts (granted probably only $5 or less per gift, but it is still going to a good cause) to a charity of my choice in mine and my fiancee's names.

banana468 · March 2010

valconel, care to cite these sources of yours that say etiquette is changing where one doesn't need to open her shower gifts at a shower?

sucrets4 · March 2010

I honestly cannot believe that people think that my responses are based on me being pregnant. What a closed minded, ignorant thing to say. Most women get all upset if guys blame their bitchiness on PMS or having their period, yet as a fellow woman you think it's okay to perpetuate that stereotype?

Me being honest has nothing to do with me being pregnant, and many people can attest to that.

Lenore2010 · March 2010

Ok, here is what I think in numbered order, so it is nice and clear for anyone who cares to read it:

1. Love the idea of bringing unwrapped gifts. I love it for a lot of situations, come to think of it and I hope it catches on. Very eco friendly, low cost, no fuss. Yea, it messes up the surprise factor but we are not eight years old. I would be happy to get or give an unwrapped gift!

2. "Snarky" is not an excuse for hostile/bitchy. I do not think it is fair to pick on someone's pregnancy, but damn, take it down a notch Sucrets-and Sucrets is not the only one-and "snarky" is not the only board where the hostile/bitchy/higH n' mighty is an issue around here. You can say something straight up with sounding like a big angry beotch.

3. I am spending the rest of my Knot time on other boards. Farewell to "Snarky". I have seen some very cool posters around here, but tired of the beotch factor that is passing for "snarky" too much around here. As I said on another thread, Snarky to me is honest opinions given straight up, which is not really what is going on with all to many people here.

Off to enjoy the other boards-and my less than two weeks from today wedding.

nda_roxybabe · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-not-open-gifts-bridal-shower?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:8a20e93b-c664-4a63-b570-80ca313efd24Post:f079f690-1a20-43a1-b9f3-017011cb024f">Re: Is is rude to NOT open gifts at your bridal shower?</a>:
[QUOTE]Ok, here is what I think in numbered order, so it is nice and clear for anyone who cares to read it: 1. Love the idea of bringing unwrapped gifts. I love it for a lot of situations, come to think of it and I hope it catches on. Very eco friendly, low cost, no fuss. Yea, it messes up the surprise factor but we are not eight years old. I would be happy to get or give an unwrapped gift! <strong>2. "Snarky" is not an excuse for hostile/bitchy.</strong> I do not think it is fair to pick on someone's pregnancy, but damn, take it down a notch Sucrets-and Sucrets is not the only one-and "snarky" is not the only board where the hostile/bitchy/higH n' mighty is an issue around here. You can say something straight up with sounding like a big angry beotch. 3. I am spending the rest of my Knot time on other boards. Farewell to "Snarky". I have seen some very cool posters around here, but tired of the beotch factor that is passing for "snarky" too much around here. As I said on another thread, Snarky to me is honest opinions given straight up, which is not really what is going on with all to many people here. Off to enjoy the other boards-and my less than two weeks from today wedding.
Posted by Lenore2010[/QUOTE]
Actually, it kind of is.

sucrets4 · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-not-open-gifts-bridal-shower?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:8a20e93b-c664-4a63-b570-80ca313efd24Post:11aec438-7e78-481a-86dc-3ee09dd4afc7">Re: Is is rude to NOT open gifts at your bridal shower?</a>:
[QUOTE]Banana486...here's a link to a main source: <a href="http://www.buffalonews.com/2009/05/03/659672/tradition-should-fade-away.html" rel="nofollow">http://www.buffalonews.com/2009/05/03/659672/tradition-should-fade-away.html</a> This comes courtesy of Miss Manners who believes that this should apply not just to bridal and baby showers, but kid's birthday parties as well.
Posted by valconel[/QUOTE]

Is this just the first article that showed up in your google search? You don't even live in Buffalo, presumably from your location. And 1 article that is writing about a trend doesn't mean that the etiquette has changed.

banana468 · March 2010

I'll buy that Judith Martin is a respected source on etiquette.

BUT that doesn't mean that the etiquette has changed.

And if anything, the impression I get is that she finds the way these parties go to be rather distasteful for their materialism in general.

trishandbrad · April 2010

I'm just going to say I hate opening gifts in front of people. However, if someone loves me enough to buy me a gift, wrap it, and come to my shower than if they want to watch me open it I will. However, it would not bother me if I went to a shower and they didnt't open gifts. Not wrapping could be a good eco friendly way to avoid gift opening, however if people are expecting that excitement of watching you rip the paper off and be surprised, I think not letting them wrap their gifts could upset them as well.
So, do what you want because you will never make everyone happy.

valconel · April 2010

Sucrets4...I realize that I am located in PA, but was not aware that my location precluded me from having the ability to travel or live in another state. That being said, no, this was not a link I just grabbed off of Google or Yahoo or whatever site you care to mention. Having a few friends in the business means that numerous wedding topics get discussed and often. As for additional sources, check out brides.com, MissFancyPants bride blog, teamwedding.com, etc.

It is interesting to note that the "norm" - standard way things are done - does change with one's location. "Clear" showers - where gifts are wrapped in cellophane or not wrapped at all - are becoming more the rage. In addition, down south it's not unusual to have a miscellaneous bridal shower/tea where the bride does open her gifts, but not in front of everyone at one time. She joins clusters of friends throughout the afternoon and opens their gifts in groups while the MOB and other female relatives visit with other guests that have joined the shower. In addition, in the UK it is not abnormal for a bridal shower to be more about a particular theme or activity than a general "showering" of gifts for the bride. In fact, this is becoming a trend even here in the states where a lot of brides are waiting until a bit later in life to marry and thus, have already established a home. This means that the shower takes the direction of something like lingerie, honeymoon fund, or even just a group of gals getting together to customize jewelry to go with their wedding attire. Things of that ilk.

Is is rude to NOT open gifts at your bridal shower?

Re: Is is rude to NOT open gifts at your bridal shower?

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