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Can I ask the mother of my flower girl to rush order the dress??

slowlyfallingup3slowlyfallingup3 member
First Comment
in Wedding Woes
I sent out flower girl dress information to my friend, and the mother of my flower girl 3 months ago. She promptly replied and said she'd order the dress the next day. To my surprise I was talking to her husband a month ago and he mentioned that the mother hadn't ordered the dress yet. I sent her all the info again, and again she promptly replied saying that it was a done deal. Today I got a message saying "we need to talk about some things" and I'm freaking out because I think it means she still hasn't order the dress!! No brick-and-mortar places will be able to get the dress here for the wedding (It's in 10 weeks). I did find online sites that say they can rush the dress for $60. That means that this already expensive dress $180, is now going to cost $240 without tax. If she hasn't ordered the dress and said the stores won't rush it is it ok to say "I found this place online that will here are the links"? 

**Note: there's more than one flower girl and the other flower girl already has her dress, and their dresses match mine....
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Re: Can I ask the mother of my flower girl to rush order the dress??

  • loveshine1loveshine1 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    If you pay the difference.
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  • Butter CookieButter Cookie member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_can-ask-mother-of-flower-girl-rush-order-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:eefa41dc-29ad-48bf-8ec7-5c710dab48b0Post:42c0f79f-ab16-4f0e-a1ee-0fe5a9fc3639">Can I ask the mother of my flower girl to rush order the dress??</a>:
    [QUOTE]I sent out flower girl dress information to my friend, and the mother of my flower girl 3 months ago. She promptly replied and said she'd order the dress the next day. To my surprise I was talking to her husband a month ago and he mentioned that the mother hadn't ordered the dress yet. I sent her all the info again, and again she promptly replied saying that it was a done deal. Today I got a message saying "we need to talk about some things" and I'm freaking out because I think it means she still hasn't order the dress!! No brick-and-mortar places will be able to get the dress here for the wedding (It's in 10 weeks). I did find online sites that say they can rush the dress for $60. That means that this already expensive dress $180, is now going to cost $240 without tax. If she hasn't ordered the dress and said the stores won't rush it is it ok to say "I found this place online that will here are the links"?  **Note: there's more than one flower girl and the other flower girl already has her dress, and their dresses match mine....
    Posted by slowlyfallingup3[/QUOTE]

    If she hasn't ordered the dress you could just let her find the daughter something at a department store? There are really cute (and affordable) dresses out there for children.
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  • *Barbie**Barbie* member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    maybe the mom thinks that $180 for a dress that her kid will wear once is insane. 

    My FG got their dresses from David's, and the staff told the girs to wait until 3 months out from the wedding to order so that they could have a better guess on the size. Our girls were both about 4-4.5, and they both had growth spurts around that time- if they hadn't waited, the dresses would have been too small.
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  • hmonkeyhmonkey member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    talk to her first; freak out later.
    image
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  • MNNEBrideMNNEBride member
    First Comment 5 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_can-ask-mother-of-flower-girl-rush-order-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:eefa41dc-29ad-48bf-8ec7-5c710dab48b0Post:42c0f79f-ab16-4f0e-a1ee-0fe5a9fc3639">Can I ask the mother of my flower girl to rush order the dress??</a>:
    [QUOTE]I  Today I got a message saying "we need to talk about some things" and I'm freaking out because I think it means she still hasn't order the dress!! Posted by slowlyfallingup3[/QUOTE]

    I think you need to talk to the mom directly.  The message you received from her today could mean MANY different things, like....
    ....we need to talk because I've reconsidered and my daughter won't be in the wedding.
    .....we need to talk because I spaced off on ordering the dress and I can't afford to pay the rush order.
    .....we need talk because we can't afford for my daughter to be in the wedding.

    TALK DIRECTLY TO THE MOM
    image
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  • loveshine1loveshine1 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Also, that seems like a lot of money for a flower girl's dress the kid is going to wear one time, and MAYBE play dress up in.

    I think my FG's dress was $50, including shipping. She looked adorable.
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  • 6fsn6fsn member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    You asked more than one child to wear a $180 dress?  Yowza. 

    Listen to MNNEBride here.  I can't form any other thoughts because I'm hung up on fg dresses being almost twice my bm dresses.
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  • NOLABridesmaidNOLABridesmaid member
    First Answer 5 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    I need to see this dress.
    image
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  • slowlyfallingup3slowlyfallingup3 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    When I had originally sent the dress info to the girls' mothers' the dresses were on sale for $110. The sale is over now, so yes, the dress will probably now cost $180. 

    Here's the dress: 

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  • slowlyfallingup3slowlyfallingup3 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

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  • NOLABridesmaidNOLABridesmaid member
    First Answer 5 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    NO COMMENT.
    image
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  • loveshine1loveshine1 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Does your dress have that red thing in the back, too?
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  • *Barbie**Barbie* member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    how old are these kids?

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  • hmonkeyhmonkey member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011

    :: sits next to nola, elbowing and nodding ::

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  • Butter CookieButter Cookie member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    http://www2.jcpenney.com/jcp/X6.aspx?GrpTyp=PRD&ItemID=16c11ce&DeptID=70675&CatID=71083&SO=0&SelDim=4~285&x5view=1&Ne=285+5+29+3+1031+1017+8+18+949+833&shopperType=G&N=4294950551+4294966975&Nao=0&PSO=0&CmCatId=70675|71083

    These dresses are adorable. You could get it with shoes and hair accessories that match your dress and voila. Money saved for parents, and a dress the child can wear to Church or something.
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  • slowlyfallingup3slowlyfallingup3 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My dress is the same as the bridal dress shown in the other pic, without the pink. The color actually matches the bridesmaids(new picture attached) 

    The girls are 8 & 4

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  • 6fsn6fsn member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Got room for one more to sit with you?

    $110 is still crazy.  (Says the woman who bought $14 fg dresses)
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  • christyran1228christyran1228
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_can-ask-mother-of-flower-girl-rush-order-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:eefa41dc-29ad-48bf-8ec7-5c710dab48b0Post:85e29141-b865-42b2-8821-ef5a0e309113">Re: Can I ask the mother of my flower girl to rush order the dress??</a>:
    [QUOTE]You asked more than one child to wear a $180 dress?  Yowza.  Listen to MNNEBride here.  I can't form any other thoughts because I'm hung up on fg dresses being almost twice my bm dresses.
    Posted by 6fsn[/QUOTE]

    I felt terrible wanting the $100 dress & shoes my FG is going to wear (the one she picked out), so I gave my SIL half of the cost.  My neice is sooooo excited to wear it, and the shoes!  So I'm sure after the wedding she'll never take it off and we'll get our money's worth.  Obviously, my neice has me wrapped around her little finger. :-)

    And lots of department stores have TONS of really cute, appropriate dresses she can wear that are a little more budget-friendly.

    BUT, I would talk to her before you freak out about anything.


    edit:  I think THAT dress might be hard to find at a department store.   lol
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  • *Barbie**Barbie* member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    spaghetti straps on a 4yo? you're kidding, right? 
     I hope her mom is the one holding out - that dress IS NOT age appropriate. 
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  • LauriacLauriac
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I think its kind of cute how they match.

    However, IF I had a FG, I would have said to FG's mom "Get her something ivory and we'll tie a dark red ribbon around her" and left it up to FG's mom.

    You wanna hear about ridic FG dresses? When I was 5, I was in my uncle's wedding and his (now ex)wife picked out this insane $250 pink thing with puff sleeves and a hoop skirt. I should find pictures . . .
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  • Cant_wait!Cant_wait!
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_can-ask-mother-of-flower-girl-rush-order-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:eefa41dc-29ad-48bf-8ec7-5c710dab48b0Post:574b8ad4-0f6b-4159-b6db-7ae7ace72b7b">Re: Can I ask the mother of my flower girl to rush order the dress??</a>:
    [QUOTE]spaghetti straps on a 4yo? you're kidding, right?   I hope her mom is the one holding out - that dress IS NOT age appropriate. 
    Posted by *Barbie*[/QUOTE]
    as much as I hate "the dress", that's your opinion. I don't find spagetti straps age innapropriate for kids. I find them more innapropiate on older gals with side boob and cleave.
    image
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  • *Barbie**Barbie* member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    our FGs tried on one spaghetti strap dress similar to OP (no train) something like:

    and everyone thought it looked really inappropriate - there's just way too much bare on top.

    i'd still SMH at:
    but at least she's a little more covered. 

    maybe just my opinion, but OP's dress is way too "mature" for a 4yo. 
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  • *Barbie**Barbie* member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_can-ask-mother-of-flower-girl-rush-order-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:eefa41dc-29ad-48bf-8ec7-5c710dab48b0Post:2e6b0c2e-1356-4788-afb3-fff82d624e5b">Re: Can I ask the mother of my flower girl to rush order the dress??</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Can I ask the mother of my flower girl to rush order the dress?? : as much as I hate "the dress", that's your opinion. I don't find spagetti straps age innapropriate for kids. I <strong>find them more innapropiate on older gals with side boob and cleave.</strong>
    Posted by Cant_wait![/QUOTE]

    <div>that's a question of fit/finding a flattering dress, not so much age appropriateness. </div>
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  • Cant_wait!Cant_wait!
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    That's true, I just don't find them any more innapropriate than a bathing suit. But I also live in CA where people are probably much more naked on a daily basis than in PA, so maybe I'm just used to it!
    image
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  • *Barbie**Barbie* member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    i don't like skimpy bathing suits on little kids either - there are too many perverts out there. 

    ETA: 
    I might have to start shopping on the modesty suit site if i have a little girl ;-) 
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