Thank You Etiquette for New Husband's Family

My husband and I are three weeks newly married.  Wedding went off without a hitch from church ceremony to  luau reception for 90 done all by my family.  It was really hard work from which I think we all need another vacation.  I am in the process of writing thank you cards for gifts to those who joined us in the celebration, now.  Weird problem here is that we did not receive anything from any of my husband's family.  Of his 32 members including siblings, spouses, nieces, nephews, grandkids, one in-law not even invited, and two friends that attended our destination wedding, not one gave him or us a gift of any kind much less a card.  It  was so weird.  Almost embarrassing, really.  They all had a great time and expressed much appreciation for us getting married in such a beautiful setting.  Granted, they may have thought that their gifts were their presence in joining us, but to not even receive a card from any of them? They all just came for the party.  And, we've received numerous gifts from a good deal of folks who didn't even attend. I am trying so hard to not seem prissy, but I don't know what to think or how to react aside from dumbfoundment.  Am I obligated to send any of them thank you cards?  My  husband has already passed along the website info to all of them for accessing our wedding photos and they've spoken loads about the wedding fun they all had. Thoughts, comments anyone?

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Re: Thank You Etiquette for New Husband's Family

  • edited December 2011
    Wow, how weird!  Have you talked to your husband about it?  Maybe it is a cultural thing?  Or just what is customary for his family?  Granted, they probably did spend a lot of money to attend and gifts are never a requirement, but very weird that they wouldn't even write a card.  Could it be that they feel they have up to a year after the wedding to send a gift, and they just haven't done so yet because they've been saving up for the trip??  I don't know...just as there is certain ettiquette for the bride and groom to follow, there is ettiquette for guests.  Personally, I would feel weird and embarrassed to not bring or send a gift.

    As for whether or not you should send a thank you card, I'm not sure.  You could send them one and just say "thank you for your presence at our wedding."  I really am at a loss here.,.I would think the best thing to do is talk to your husband and see what he thinks.
  • edited December 2011
    Yes, send them thank you cards. If they came, you send one. We didn't get cards or gifts from all of my FI's friends either, but we still sent them TY cards. That way, you're guaranteed to be in the right!
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