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December 2010 Weddings

Yep just freaked out! Ugh

My FI's best man just popped in. He is FYI's little brother as well. He's 21.  He came here because he needs help in planning FI's stag and doesn't know where to have it or how to do it.  Ugh hello BM the wedding is in 6 weeks and you are planning a stag party now?
Then he tells me that he has nothing done and is hoping that the tickets they sell will pay for everything because he has no money to do any of this.  So I start to give him pointers where to have it, what to cook, who to get a hold of, etc.  He's talking and honestly I can feel my blood start to boil and then bam!:
"It's a month away! You just started this now! You don't have time and you can't get it done! Plus I'm not cooking. I have enough of my own stuff to do for this wedding and you're here asking me for help with something that should already be done and who the hell is helping us? Not you! Not your family! I am too stressed to deal with this right now." 
Then the FI comes home and the BM starts asking him about how to plan a stag and they are calling places and I'm thinking FI shouldn't be planning is own stuff and then in my glorious bridezillaness "Josh can you just go home. I don't want to deal with this right now please just leave." FI looks at me like I'm crazy and BM leaves. I felt terrible because BM is young and has never done this before and well, I know I hurt him. :(   Neither of them knew, but my sister had called me about an hour before bitching about FSIL, also a bm, and FMIL.  My shower is this weekend and they haven't helped her at all. They also made plans with her twice to help out and never showed and then wouldn't return her calls or texts. This pissed me off to start and this on top of it. UGH!  I wish I could just crawl into bed and sleep. 
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Re: Yep just freaked out! Ugh

  • ahhh so sorry to hear this!!! you might have been reacting on frustration for various reasons BUT your points are still valid. he shouldn't have waited til now especially since it his first time. i think right now the best thing to do is to make sure things with FI are smooth and then talk w/FI about who BM could talk to for help (maybe another guy friend or something). other than that don't worry too much about it, it doesn't directly affect you and if it's something FI will be annoyed/mad about if it's not done right then that's between him and BM. good luck and deep breaths!!  :)
  • Oh I'm sorry.:(  Don't freak out anymore.  Guys operate on their own timeframes so he thinks he has plenty of time.  They will throw something together and I'm sure your FI will love it. :)  Just DON'T agree to cook for them!  They can take him to Hooters or someplace!...

    I can't help you with the FSIL problems, I've kinda got my own. :)

    Turn that frown, upside down!

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  • Well it's been resolved! Got the "I love you sis. I know your stressed. Should have asked Dave (older wiser groomsman)"  It made me cry.  So emotional ick. haha
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  • Breathe :)

    Then, tell him to look on "The Plunge", they had bachelor party ideas on there. And as far as money, in my experience each attendee pays for himself plus a little extra to pay for the groom. Hopefully he can come up with his share.

    It's really easy to get caught up in everyone else's drama when planning a wedding, but you have your own. I have bitten FI's head off a few times when he didn't deserve it. Eventually I apologize and explain why  Iwas "crazy" and then things are good. Maybe you can give BM a call and explain, while directing him to the plunge and away from you.

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  • Glad it's all resolved now:-) Wedding planning= tears!
  • So glad to hear you got it all worked out!!  :)  I think we have all had our fair share of freakouts.
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