September 2012 Weddings

Crazy family vent.

UghFI's family driving me off the wall. First, his maternal grandma calls freaking out that we didn't invite her son who hasn't ever spoken to us, once. Saying she won't come if he isn't invited/doesn't come. Even though we were just there yesterday and talked about guest list stuff and she didn't mention this? Then his dad and step mom are mad that we didn't invite friends and family of theirs that we don't even know, I'm sorry but I'm not going to sacrifice a dance floor for folks we dot know. THEN they're mad because someone asked a question and I said 'Just ask Bob' on FB Bobhis dad even though it was absolutely in no way shape or form offensive? They were coming to visit tomorrow but now I guess they just got over being sick coveniently and won't be able to make it. They're driving me nuts!!! Them and the step moms side of the family skipped our sons whole baptism even though they all said they were going to it and just went to the party after, we even had to wait around for them and my family was quite upset since they were hosting, and they're hosting our wedding and asked us that we just put 'reception following' on invites and give directions on our programs to the venue and they're upset about that too. Everyone's mad!!

Re: Crazy family vent.

  • Yep... families suck.  For some reason, people think a wedding is a family reunion for their side of the family, regardless of the relationship to the couple getting married.

    My grandfather & (step)grandma are mad, and have been for almost a year, because my aunt & her family aren't invited (I haven't seen or spoken to them in over a decade, and don't really like them, and my grandmother doesn't speak to them so she would be very uncomfortable if they were in attendance - why would I invite them?).

    My great-aunt was going to come from Ireland to the wedding, and then asked if her cousin, who lives about 1 hour away from the venue, was invited.  Honestly, he's not even on my Top 50 list of people I'd like to invite if we had been having a bigger guest list.  I haven't seen him or spoken to him since I was probably 5 years old.  Now she's not coming because he's not coming.  Oh well!

    FFIL got really upset because he saw pictures of my bridal shower with my Dad & FI in them (the guys showed up at the beginning to meet up with my grandfather and FI's uncle, who had driven their wives to the shower, and take them out to lunch - and then came back to pick up gifts).  FFIL thought he had been intentionally not invited to a family event, and stopped talking to us for about 2 weeks.  Since he wouldn't take our calls, we couldn't explain - finally FI had to ask his sister, who lives near their Dad, to go explain it to him in person.  Geez...

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    Anniversary

  • Weddings just bring out the crazy in people.  The guest list was our first dip into the crazy pool.  No one is going to agree 100% with what you are going to do or who you are inviting.  The most important thing is to take a step back.  It's a wedding.  YES a wedding is an incredibly important and significant day but it is one day.  People just need to relax and let things happen otherwise everyone will be miserable until it's over.  Also, unfortunately those that are footing the bill do have some say in guest number, etc.  Choose your battles wisely and just move on.  
  • I'm bracing for impact between my shower and our wedding. My FMIL is a nut case and has already tried to put her 2 cents in where it was not merrited. I'm chosing to ignore her at least not show her she gets to me. FI has about had it with her too. But that stems from years prior to me being in the picture.

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_crazy-family-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:e8a1db71-8f70-48d5-874d-fcee568b0d7dPost:22a9fb0a-df1f-4106-ac12-c109a9382fa1">Re: Crazy family vent.</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'm bracing for impact between my shower and our wedding. My FMIL is a nut case and has already tried to put her 2 cents in where it was not merrited. I'm chosing to ignore her at least not show her she gets to me. FI has about had it with her too. But that stems from years prior to me being in the picture.
    Posted by FutureMrsR5711[/QUOTE]

    This entire paragraph is my life lol.... I've just about had it and I'm about to explode on her. But I am trying to keep my cool (after all it is still FI mother, even though they dont really get along).  Sometimes it is very hard to bite my tongue though!  I just want peace at my shower & the wedding...
  • Relieved to know I am for sure not alone! We are picking our battles, which is why I'm thankful for TK, a safe place to just let it all out so I don't implode on myself. It really is trueweddings DO bring out the worst in people! FFIL and his wife are paying for our flowers. My aunt bought my 750 gown and our stephanos Greek thing, not cheap AND hosting the rehearsal dinner, other Aunt and uncle are providing a venue, food, staff, get away vehicle lol, we are sooooo blessed to have all this help. But my point is, they are contributing so little, we already invited a ton of people in their family, so I'm perplexed as to why they feel entitled to so much.
  • Oops, by they I meant FFIL and wife. They are well off people, flowers are less than 500
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_crazy-family-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:e8a1db71-8f70-48d5-874d-fcee568b0d7dPost:547c2744-ca68-4cbb-bb51-6d629166ccdf">Re: Crazy family vent.</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Crazy family vent. : This entire paragraph is my life lol.... I've just about had it and I'm about to explode on her. But I am trying to keep my cool (after all it is still FI mother, even though they dont really get along).  Sometimes it is very hard to bite my tongue though!  I just want peace at my shower & the wedding...
    Posted by cronin85[/QUOTE]

    I'll keep you in my thoughts as I guess we totally understand choosing to be the bigger person and biting our tongues! LOL. Hopefully our FMILs respect the celebration and keep their issues to themselves.
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