Catholic Weddings

Pre-Cana

How many of you girls have already done Pre-cana? I am actually excited to go and was just wondering any feedback that you guys could give me on how it went, etc.

My Fiance and I will be going to a one-day retreat.


TIA!

Anniversary

Re: Pre-Cana

  • Calypso1977Calypso1977 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    ours was just 3 meetings with the priest.  it was very faith based, versus telling us secular based things like how to balance a checkbook, etc.  we enjoyed it, but we also adore our priest and knew him well as we were regular parishioners.
  • Theresa626Theresa626 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I just went this weekend. Look a few posts down for my experience of it. 
  • mbcdefgmbcdefg member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    We did a one-day session in the fall. We both enjoyed it ... it brought up a lot of good topics, and it was refreshing to see that we're both on the same page with major life topics (when to have kids, views toward money, life goals, etc.). Most people in our group, and us, said that it covered stuff that any responsible couple should have covered before they got engaged, but we thought it was still valuable.

    FI went into it grumbling, but by the end he said that he'd enjoyed it and he thought it was worthwhile and wasn't as dull/overly religious as he thought it'd be.
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  • chubbybunnychubbybunny member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Ours was two Saturdays from 9-2. Overall, I'd say it was a positive experience. THe first session was much more enjoyable than the second, but I think that was because of the presenters, rather than the content. The priest that presented on the second weekend struck me as quite sexist, which bothers me, but more than that, he just didn't seem prepared to be talking to a room full of engaged couples. I think it all depends on who the speakers are.

    But like I said, on the whole, it was a great experience. It was a good way to take a look at some of the really important issues that affect a marriage. Some of that stuff gets lost during the planning of the wedding. I hope you enjoy it!
  • edited December 2011
    We went last weekend. I don't attend church regularly but I still have faith in God, I just prefer to pray on my own.

    Anyway, I got a renewed sense of my faith after our pre-cana. We did a one day session. It was held by a married couple with about 25 other couples there. It was a lot of fun and FI even enjoyed it. We basically went over what marriage is all about in the Catholic Church and why it shouldn't be entered lightly. We also went over NFP.  Just enter the day with an open mind. It's not as bad as you might think it is. 
  • edited December 2011
    We did the one-day Pre-cana lasting 8 hours, and I really hate to say it, but our experience was not so positive.  It wasn't bad or anything, but I just felt a little disappointed that we weren't able to take much away from it, like we had hoped.  

    Here's an overview of ours, but it can definitely vary depending on your area:  There were a few different speakers and it was mostly just a lecture-style but we were able to give our input and ask questions if we wanted.  They talked about NFP for at least half the day (which I thought was pretty excessive considering the Catholic churches in my town provide free counseling for this anyway).  They also discussed finances and how to do a budget (which might have been helpful for some people, but we've already been doing this for years).  We also took the Myers-Briggs Personality Inventory to see how we match up (which was kind of fun, but I majored in psychology so I've taken this test in numerous classes already and it wasn't FI's first time taking it either).  We also filled out a family tree (once again...fun, but totally unnecessary for us because we've been together almost 5 years and were friends before that...we know each other's entire family.  Also, I would hope that if people are getting married then they've met each other's families already or at least talked about them!).  I do have to say the best part was that they had us write letters to each other saying why we love each other and what we look forward to in our marriage.  All of this has been discussed also, but it's still always great to hear it again or read about it.  It was actually pretty emotional.  

    Anyway, I hope everyone else's experiences have been a little better.  I was really hoping to get more out of it, I guess.  I've heard much better things about the Engaged Encounter Weekend but unfortunately, we couldn't go to this...the one we signed up for got cancelled and then we couldn't re-schedule because of FI's job.         
  • edited December 2011
    FI and I went to our Pre-Cana class this past Saturday, and our experience with the Pre-Cana class was much like Katie's. A lot of the info they gave us was pretty dry (I caught 5 people falling asleep during the finances portion of the talk) and/or didn't apply to us. We only briefly touched on the Meyer-Briggs personality test (we didn't actually take it, so that felt like it was missing) and we only really got to interact with each other maybe twice during the day (during the communications portion and the love letters we wrote at the end).

    When they discussed NFP, they had this guy blab on and on about why it's unholy to use condoms/the Pill, while his wife sat off to the side looking (and I'm sad to say this) very unhappy. I'm thinking she wasn't too thrilled to be tracking her mens and keeping a calendar of when they're not allowed to have sex.

    FI really didn't enjoy the class at all, and he's the one who's Catholic (not me, but I'm working on that). I, however, learned a lot, but I think that's because I went into it with more of an open mind.
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  • Calypso1977Calypso1977 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I'm thinking she wasn't too thrilled to be tracking her mens and keeping a calendar of when they're not allowed to have sex.

    when you use NFP, there's never a time when you are not allowed to have sex.  there's times when you might not want to if you dont want a baby, but its never not allowed.
  • Riss91Riss91 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    We did a weekend pre-cana session, about 7-8 hours on both Sat and Sun. I thought it was a really great experience. We had a really great instructor that was well read in marriage and communication studies. We mainly discussed how to communicate and understand each other's needs. We spoke of NFP very briefly, but they offer a separate class on the topic so they did not go into detail. I think most of the couples were pleasantly surprised at how helpful the program was.
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