Pre-wedding Parties

Separate guest lists for multiple bridal showers?

I'm not certain about the etiquette on this. My FH's aunt recently contacted me and asked if she could throw me a luncheon/shower. I'm really touched and would love that. My concern is that my BM and I were discussing doing a shower, spa session, and bachelorette party all on the same day, about two weeks out from the wedding. Right now I am figuring it will be easiest to have family/older people to the luncheon/shower during the summer and have the younger crowd turn out for a honeymoon shower/spa visit/bachelorette party. So my question is this, can the same guests (whoever is interested) be invited to both parties? On both sides of the families are some younger ladies that both showers would be applicable to. I just want everyone to be included and have fun but I also don't want people to think I'm fishing for gifts or double dipping. Thoughts?
-also posting in etiquette
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Re: Separate guest lists for multiple bridal showers?

  • edited March 2012
    No, I think they would be more offended if they weren't invited to all of them. I would be anyway. If you happen to talk to any of them on the phone, mention casually that they dont have to bring gifts to both showers, although they probably will. Save the bachelorette party for your closest girlfriends/ bridesmaids. No one 'expects' to be invited to that.
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  • I would personally just make the younger crowd thing a no-gifts occasion.  It sounds like you have enough other things going on.  Not to mention you said a "honeymoon shower" which I can only assume means you expect people to just give $$ towards your honeymoon, which is a bit taboo anyways.  If you have a shower, you need to be expecting physical gifts, because that's the whole point of a shower - to shower the bride with gifts. 
  • I don't really think there is a problem inviting people to both things, but you might want to consider keeping one for just your close friends and family. Some of your other friends/family might feel like you are asking a lot by having so many events. You may also say no gifts for one of the events.
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