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African American Weddings

Are you saving it?

Random questions:

1) Are you saving the top tier of your cake for your anniversary? We aren't, but I know some people do...what about you?

2) Are you and FI saving yourselves by holding back the goods for any length of time before you get married (as in are you abstaining or are you virgins)? We are abstaining...it's challenging, yet very rewarding so far.
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Re: Are you saving it?

  • msapril0730msapril0730 member
    1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    1) Are you saving the top tier of your cake for your anniversary?No our bakery is actually giving us a complimentary tier on our first anniversary because they did a no call no show at our fist appt with them. If we weren't getting a free tier I wouldn't save it.

    2) Are you and FI saving yourselves by holding back the goods for any length of time before you get married (as in are you abstaining or are you virgins)? I've been trying but my FI isn't happy about it! He gets mad, pouts and some more. I have discussed the benefits of it with him and he understands so we are down to about once a week.
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  • edited December 2011
    1) Are you saving the top tier of your cake for your anniversary? Once I find a baker I will know for sure.  If I don't get a free on probably won't year old frozen cake doesn't sound so good

    2) Are you and FI saving yourselves by holding back the goods for any length of time before you get married (as in are you abstaining or are you virgins)? We have talked about it a little and more than likely will more once we start pre-marital counseling.


    sn:great questions
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  • edited December 2011
    1) Are you saving the top tier of your cake for your anniversary? Our baker is giving us a free complimentary teir for our first year. They told us that year old cake is gross and not safe to their standards.

    2) Are you and FI saving yourselves by holding back the goods for any length of time before you get married (as in are you abstaining or are you virgins)? Nope in fact i am trying to talk him into giving those cookies up the night before so i can be on chill mode...
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  • edited December 2011
    1) Are you saving the top tier of your cake for your anniversary? Nope.... I will probably just go pick up a replica or something to eat on the anniversary.

    2) Are you and FI saving yourselves by holding back the goods for any length of time before you get married (as in are you abstaining or are you virgins)? We are abstaining and it has been difficult at times but I think that in the end God will honor our marriage. 


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  • csuperstar02csuperstar02 member
    Sixth Anniversary 500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    1) Are you saving the top tier of your cake for your anniversary?
    We didn't, and boy, were my people mad at me!!!! I don't want it, I'm not going to eat it, I don't care what you think! haha My cousins all said that that year old cake was just fine, but I'm still not interested!

    2) Are you and FI saving yourselves by holding back the goods for any length of time before you get married (as in are you abstaining or are you virgins)?
    We were planning to stop in July, but that didn't pan out.
    Embarassed I think we ended up going without for 2, maybe 3 weeks before.

    ?Well-behaved women rarely make history.?


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  • edited December 2011
    1) Are you saving the top tier of your cake for your anniversary? That's what our top tier is for, but we will probably end up tossing it if its not gone by a week. I don't think I want year old cake even if saved...lol.

    2) Are you and FI saving yourselves by holding back the goods for any length of time before you get married (as in are you abstaining or are you virgins)? At this point, don't think it'll happen. We've been together for 10 years so we're in too deep with that. Once we start premarital counseling, it may become a topic of interest. Seriously doubt it, but we'll see.
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  • TNMurrayTNMurray member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    1) Are you saving the top tier of your cake for your anniversary?  I plan to. I hear they are always good.

    2) Are you and FI saving yourselves by holding back the goods for any length of time before you get married (as in are you abstaining or are you virgins)? Sooooooo (with the scrunched up face) we say will but still haven't. I told him we gonna stop  but he looked at me like I was crazy. Hopefully after we start pre-marital counceling we will.
  • 7venAfricano7venAfricano member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011

    1) Are you saving the top tier of your cake for your anniversary? First Off I want to know who thought it would be tasty to freeze a cake, leave it for a YEAR, and then turn around and eat it? Hell to the naw, we're not doing that. Now, we may START to save the cake and it ACCIDENTILY gets eaten the following week...that seems plausible Wink

    2) Are you and FI saving yourselves by holding back the goods for any length of time before you get married (as in are you abstaining or are you virgins)?
    In this case, I have a hard time seeing that happening. FI and I go at it like rabbits when we live together and we plan on getting our own place soon. I think we could possibly go, at the most 4wks/a month- TOPS. I'm the same as him though, if I can get it, I don't feel I should have to go without it but to make our wedding night special I'm more than willing to wait but I don't think my baby can handle going without for over a month, even that may be too much (2 wks maybe). Anything more than that and he'll flip. I can only imagine suggesting we wait from January to June before getting it on again... men can be such babies when they can't get no yum-yum

  • prncszprncsz member
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    1) Are you saving the top tier of your cake for your anniversary? Probably not we will get a small round cake on our anniversary.

    2) Are you and FI saving yourselves by holding back the goods for any length of time before you get married (as in are you abstaining or are you virgins? We will probably abstain once we start marital counseling. We both agree that at least a month or two before we would like to abstain.
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  • cyndoncyndon member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    1) Are you saving the top tier of your cake for your anniversary?We aren't, it's going to be red velvet so, I am eating that bad boy!  However, the lady who is making our cake remakes your top tier for you for your one year anniversary.

    2) Are you and FI saving yourselves by holding back the goods for any length of time before you get married (as in are you abstaining or are you virgins)? We are as of 1-1-11.  I think I will be okay, but I think he is going to go stir crazy.
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  • edited December 2011
    1) Are you saving the top tier of your cake for your anniversary? 
    We left for our honeymoon right after the reception and my mother wrapped up the top tier of the cake and took it home for us.  When we got back we opened it and ate a piece.  I put it back in the freezer but I doubt we will eat it.  I will order us a little cake for our anniversary.


    2) Are you and FI saving yourselves by holding back the goods for any length of time before you get married (as in are you abstaining or are you virgins)?
    No were definitely not virgins. We already lived together for 9 months prior to getting married. However we did abstain for one month before we got married.  We both agreed on the time that we would abstain.
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  • edited December 2011
    1) Are you saving the top tier of your cake for your anniversary? Yep...it's probably going to taste nasty but we're saving it!

    2) Are you and FI saving yourselves by holding back the goods for any length of time before you get married (as in are you abstaining or are you virgins)? We're abstaining...very hard. Ever since our premartial course we've decided to stop having sex until the wedding. 8 days to go lol!
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  • edited December 2011
    1) Are you saving the top tier of your cake for your anniversary?
    Nope.  Our baker is giving us an anniversary cake

    2) Are you and FI saving yourselves by holding back the goods for any length of time before you get married (as in are you abstaining or are you virgins)? 
    Ok, this is the deal:  we talked about it about three months ago and we didn't really make a firm decision, so we haven't abstained.  FI asked me about it again yesterday and we really don't know what to do being that we're getting married in only 8 days!   I suspect the fornicating is getting to his conscious since he's the one that's brought it up both times.  We may end up abstaining by default because lately we both literally pass out when we go to bed at night!

    I wonder if it really makes a difference if you abstain (other than for religious reasons) or if the knowledge of being married vs. dating makes that wedding night special?  Any comments?
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  • edited December 2011
    1) Are you saving the top tier of your cake for your anniversary?
    Not at all. That really does not sound very good. Our baker gives you another top tier for your anniversary!!


    2) Are you and FI saving yourselves by holding back the goods for any length of time before you get married (as in are you abstaining or are you virgins)? 
    We have tried this and needless to say FI got all mad and pissy. I am going for stopping once we start pre-marital counseling. We will see how that goes!!
  • happe2getherhappe2gether member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    1) Are you saving the top tier of your cake for your anniversary?
    Hopefully we will find a baker who will give us a cake at the one year mark. Otherwise, I'd rather just go get a fresh cake.

    2) Are you and FI saving yourselves by holding back the goods for any length of time before you get married (as in are you abstaining or are you virgins)?  We have too long to go to even think about that for now but IDK if that will be something to discuss.  I'm the one who needs it more.. FI is more conservative than me so he's cool with whatever we do.  I think if I don't get it, the really b** in me will come out.  I know for a fact I'm happier when I get it.  Also, I don't know what difference it will make, we've been together for so long and by then it will be  almost 8 years - no big surprises here from what I can tell.
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  • edited December 2011
    1) Are you saving the top tier of your cake for your anniversary? We are not only because our bakery is giving us one for our one year!
    2) Are you and FI saving yourselves by holding back the goods for any length of time before you get married (as in are you abstaining or are you virgins)? WOW great question...we haven't even thought about it!! I apologize if anyone looks down on me for this BUT when FI is in a crabby mood that's how I get him out of it LOL!! But that is something I will address.
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  • edited December 2011
    #1 we ddn't save any of our cakes.  we had three rounds.  honestly i don't want to eat year old cake, even if it was in the freezer.

    #2.  we didn't abstain.  we've lived together for 3 years, so i really didn't see the need for it. 

    also folk were asking me if we were going to spend the night before  the wedding together.  we were like "of course!"  i thought it was silly for folk to insist thta we spend the night apart because of superstition. 
  • sadou02sadou02 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    1) Are you saving the top tier of your cake for your anniversary? We wont be doing it seeing as how we're having cupcakes. Funny thing I was going to ask this question too.

    2) Are you and FI saving yourselves by holding back the goods for any length of time before you get married (as in are you abstaining or are you virgins)?By default we are already doing it.  It will be 8 months by the time I see FI. We've talked about just going all the way up until wedding day but when he comes we both wont be able to hold out so we'll probably hold out a month after that initial visit.
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